thinking that my husband might be abusing my child?

[morethanamum]

a very sensitive issue.
im shaking,crying and just want to know what happened yesterday when i went to the gp and left my kids with husband. in the evening dd1 started complaining about her genitals,i noticed redness and while applying some sudocrem i asked her "what caused it?"she said "daddy"i asked "how did he do that?"she put her hand over her genitals.i confronted him,he was furious and said im crazy and dd1 must have said this like she always does when i ask her about who did stuff she says mummy or daddy,even though i know it isn`t true.but why did she touch herself?was she just pointing at the pain?when she was 1 and 1/5 she sometimes would touch husband on genitals.we tried ignoring her and convert attention.it worked but afew days ago she did it again.
now should i believe a 3 year old.or is she lying.how can i know the truth before i do something stupid?

From your posts, the answer to your question is clear for all to see.

Sorry appologies if I'm wrong but I'm with mousemole and dashboard.
And if I'm wrong then get rid of him....you cant trust him, you obviously think he's capable of abusing your daughter...why would you wnat to be with someone like that. Think of your daughter.

im struggling to undrestand what exactly sounds odd?! he kissed her when she was about 2-3 months old.i wasnt happy with it.i told him.he said he loves her so much its not what it looks like but never will do it again if im not comfortable with it.
that`s how i solved it.

Morethanamum - You suspect, your DD has disclosed daddy hurt her, you have been anxious about the french kissing( actually surprised you did not up and off then tbh)

You have serious doubts about your husband

And NOW you are thinking of apologising.

You still have not answered my (and several other posters question)

What do you mean by french kissing?

On the mouth, a sloppy kiss?

Or an adult kiss?

alarm bells from your last post...

it's not fucking solved ,he kissed your child in a manner you felt uncomfortabe with,now you think he touching her???

was the kissing open mouthed kissing with him using his tongue, or big sloppy kisses??

dunno, this is all going a bit strange
and to put it in AIBU?

dash, when i say someone is full of shit - im being friendly, guess it doesn't translate well into type .

French kissing? Really? Are you sure - babies like to do wet sloppy kisses - but if it was from him, well, you don't need us to tell you - leave.

LEM is disturbed by this thread

yes lulu agree with you.

I feel uneasy anyway.

Agree odd place to post this but giving the OP the benefit of the doubt - please call the NSPCC and get some advice.

it's not what it looks like?

So he knew he didn't look good.

You need to sort this out and fast.

This has obv been a serious concern for a while given he 'kissed' her as a baby enough to make you uncomfortable , you posted last January about her touching him which you felt awkward about and now she has told you he made her 'sore'.

These 'issues haven't been resolved surely ?'

call the nspcc

do you hvae concerns abot him with any of the other children?

Um, what's odd is that it not normal for an adult to french kiss a baby. Period.

yes, it is absolutely odd.

why will you not clarify the kiss? If a proper adult kiss open mouthed thats wrong. To have a gut feeling about your husband is different to a stranger, you know him. If the worst was true he would be very clever and manipulating. I am replying in all serious because if the op were a troll I think that would make them quite sick. If you have a "feeling" please act on it it does not sound like you trust your DP. Years ago a friend of mine had the same situation the dh said it was the nanny`s bf and always has a good reason always acted indignant etc. When the second child started saying it my friend through him out, then found out from ex wife he had been abusing their dd too on access visits. If my friend had acted on her instincts she could have saved her dd from 6 years abuse. Have you got support, have you anyone "real" you can talk to?

Reading this, I would suggest that the OP has suspicions but really doesn't want to believe them to be true and is testing the waters as it were. Either that, or something isn't right with the story. BTW I used to be morethanmum - no connection.

please get professional advice. Call the NSPCC or go to your doctor.Anything,please, because this post is really worrying me.

Take her to the gp immediately, she needs to be checked...........please.

I think the OP IS getting off on this.

Sorry but this is really wrong, I wouldn't trust him

OP - If you are a genuine, please come back and answer.

If not, well I am too polite to say what I would want too.

"before i do something stupid? "

What is stupid about reporting your h if indeed there is a h who has abused your child.