to believe that teacher's children should be treated in the same way as other pupils

[MillyR]

At my children's primary school, there are a number of teachers working in the school who have children who are pupils in the school and sometimes even in their class. I believe that unless it is essential (because you live on a remote Scottish island), you should not teach your own child as it is unprofessional and almost impossible not to show a preference for your own child and the children that they get on with.

I work 10-7, so I do the morning drop off by public transport. I then stand outside school with my children, sometimes in very unpleasant weather. The children who come on school transport are also stood outside unsupervised. The teacher's children can be clearly seen playing in the classrooms.

Recently, I arranged to go in and speak to a teacher about my child after school, which I then had to take time off work to do. During this meeting, her children were in the classroom. There have also been times when one of teachers has walked past me with her daughters, the older daughter's best friend, and they have all gone in to play in the classroom while the rest of the children had to stay outside. They are also often in the staff room or using other school facilities that are out of bounds to other pupils.

There is out of school club available in a building nearby. My children go to it after school. I think the teacher's children should also have to go to it or wait outside like everyone else.

If a teacher wants to part of her work at home and supervise her kids there, then I am not going to moan about that. But I think it creates a bad atmosphere and sense of unfairness for pupils to be treated differently because their Mum is a teacher.

There is also a huge amount of repeating of confidential information because the teachers tell their friends things, but their friends are the mums from school!

AIBU or is this common?

I think tiny little priviledges are ok, because they probably get grief for their mum being a teacher, so that sort of evens it out.

But not all the priviledges you talk about in your OP. It seems a bit silly and I'm surprised they haven't been told to stop it earlier. Also, the discussing children with random people thing, and the children in the classroom when you had a meeting with the teacher is just unacceptable.

but the child was in school when everybody else has to be kept away for 48 hours

one of the parents should have taken the day off to care for the child.

Well that is clearly wrong then.

You are being very unreasonable how on earth can teachers leave their children outside unsupervised when we they are inside working.

When teaching(pre-kids) I arrived at school at 7.30 as always had masses to do. No way on earth would I leave my dc outside for 5 minutes let alone 11/2 hours unsupervised because somebody has sour grapes. The difference is you can wait outside and supervise your children as you aren't inside working, teachers can't. Schools aren't responsible for children until the children go in so it would be very unsafe for any child to be outside waiting alone.

My son's teacher has dc in their school, they have a friend in their class whose parent also teaches in the school. None of us parents would ever begrudge them waiting inside, it's total tedium for them anyway. Teaching is hard enough before being a parent I'm in awe of teachers who manage it with young dc. You must be the only person I've ever come across who has a problem with this it's a littlle petty to be honest.

Sorry-I thought you meant the mother was in school. The child shouldn't have been in school-there are clear rules on it!

It sounds as if Milly's school hasn't really thought things through if the children that come on school transport are having to wait about outside for 25 minutes in nasty weather, as well as those that come on the only bus near to the school (I am sure the school is aware of this fact). Our school let the children come into the school hall in similar circumstances. Probably because having a whole load of cold wet children isn't the best start to the day. I'm guessing if there are a sizable number of children clearly visible inside then that rubs salt into the wound. Resentment does have a tendency to breed if there is no outlet for raising concerns, and Milly doesn't seem to feel she can raise her legitimate concerns (about confidentiality and children being present when she is having a private meeting) so this smaller issue might be symbolizing a wider problem.

Personally I don't think children should be in workplaces except for emergencies. This occasionally happened where I used to work, and I thought it very unfair for the child in question, and it was resented by colleagues. Of course a school is an environment designed for children, so a little different, but I do think that giving some children privileges for whatever reason is far from ideal. But then, as I've said I was a "fac brat" and absolutely hated it.

The school obviously doesn't have an issue with unsupervised children in the playground though, as the children coming in on the school bus are (apparently) not supervised.

I suppose the holidays are worth it. I'm not sure though, during term time I'm a grumpy nightmare mummy. As my mum was when I was growing up, which is why I said I'd never be a teacher. Don't know what went wrong.....

That's what I wondered nooka and asked about the type of school, as no state school I have taught in would ever allow young children to be unsupervised after the school bus had delivered them.

I agree Violet,most schools I know send letters home on a regular basis reminding parents that until they go in they are not the responsibility of the school. Parents dropping and running is a common problem.

Schools are never going to ban staff from bringing their dc as a) most reasonable people don't care and b)teachers would then not get into school until 8.55 to cut down on childminding fees,not good for the children they teach and not good for staff as you'd spend the whole day catching up.

The fact is if teachers need to bring their dc in it affects nobody other than them,meetings with parents are rarely before school as there simply isn't the time.

I don't think that anyone could honestly expect a teacher to take their DC to a childminder, do their preparation at school and then pop out to collect their DC and bring to school!

I know a teacher who has done that, pisces, but teh childminder drops the child off at school as that is part of the cm's job.

It would be OK if you could find a cm to do it but I still don't see why a teacher should pay out for childcare when she is in her own time.If she chooses to be there at 7.30am it is benefiting her pupils so it is extremely petty of the parents to resent it. Luckily I have never come across anyone who had a problem with it in RL.

Golgi I am a grumpy mummy in term time, I am hoping that a change in school will stop that though. Dp said he noticed a huge change last term, I do tend to be preoccupied though

Know what you mean twinset!

That's why it makes me smile when I hear people talk about teaching being family friendly. Tell that to my kids! I have never worked as hard in any other job as I do in this one!

I think all professions have their advantages and drawbacks. I work incrediby hard in term time and have very little time for dd, to the extent that dp has had to cut back his work so he can care for her. But I hope I make up for it in the holidays.

But preparation and marking are part of a teacher's job.

People who work in a shop don't say they will only turn up the second before the shop opens and leave the second it shuts. No, they have to put in the extra time. People working in loads of professions have to put in extra hours. And those people - gasp! - have to arrange childcare. And pay for it.

I work as an LSA in a different school from my DCs. If I dropped them off at 8.45, brushed off any last minutes queries or distress, sprinted to my car and drove to work, I wouldn't need childcare. But I might be late and in the interests of professionalism, and not wanting to have to prize an anxious child off me because I am in a hurry, I decide to pay for a childminder for an hour. Which costs £9. Along with DS2's £35 for the day, this means I earn £35 and pay out £44. Which is why I am not working much.

More stories like this can be found on the thread called something like "to sink to my knees"

Sour grapes? You betcha!

Lucky teachers. No other profession would be able to swing this.

Balloonslayer - the people I have known who have worked in a shop, and for example when I worked PT in a fast food place, do generally get paid for the hours they do when the shop is closed - it is part of their directed/paid hours. IME anyway.

I have mainatained throughout this thread that I am lucky to have my job balloonslayer.

Although I dont feel that lucky as I have been writing reports since 10 this morning

balloon is right insofar that this is a perk for the 2% or so of teachers who teach in the school their children attend.

It's a tiny number, balloon. The rest of those goddamn teachers pay childcare too, you'll be pleased to hear.

I have to admit I dont quite get why people are bothered how much other people pay in childcare? I just get along with my own life not really trying to work out how much harder I have it than everyone else and have always been like that from being a penniless single mother to now.

It must be pretty bad to have such sour grapes for so many of your colleagues.

Preparation and marking are part of a teachers job and as a primary teacher I used to do it several nights a week long after I got home aswell as before and after school.

Believe me I don't know many teachers who don't do extra hours before ,after school,during the evenings and the school holidays.Because of this I will probably be switching to working as an LSA now I have dc.

Most of my friends who now have dc pay for childcare through the holidays, after school and before school if their dc aren't attending their school just like everybody else

We're talking about the few teachers who teach in the same school as their dc, I can't believe that anybody would begrudge them this little bit of time when it doesn't affect them.