Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To cry over DH?

149 replies

Pignata · 01/01/2009 23:02

DH has just told me that I ruined New Years Eve because I kept going to toilet and leaving him with "the others". By "the others" he means my family.

I have IBS and my stomach has really been playing up over christmas. Yesterday it was really painful. I decided not to drink incase it made it worse (it would have done) and DH said I was being a miserable cow and trying to spoil the party.

Today it has been worse. Everytime I go to toilet DH shouts after me "here she goes again, shitty arse" he made me cry earlier. Anyone else's DH would be supportive and maybe even sympathetic and I feel so angry that he treats me like this when I'm unwell.

Well I've just been to toilet and DH shouted up the stairs to stop showing off and seeking attention. This he said in front of 3 of our friends and they all started laughing. I've not been downstairs since. Great start to the new year.

OP posts:
thisisyesterday · 01/01/2009 23:03

and he is still your dh? he sounds like a wanker. sorry, but how can he treat you like that????

scrooged · 01/01/2009 23:04

Stick some picolax/laxative in his wine/beer/tea/coffee. Then he'll have a small idea how you are feeling. What a tosser!

stillenacht · 01/01/2009 23:05

agree thisiyesterday

perhaps though, (thinking charitably), he is tired and a little compassion fatigued?

Cupofteaplease · 01/01/2009 23:05

How nasty. Poor you

NorthernLurker · 01/01/2009 23:05

That's appalling behaviour on the part of your dh. I think you need to provide him with some written information about IBS and perhaps that will enable him to grow up and stop behaving like a vile beast. However - should he not moderate his behavioour I think you should consider it abusive and you need to think about exactly how much of that you will tolerate?

GivePeasAChance · 01/01/2009 23:06

Are you married to Jim Royle?

Yurtgirl · 01/01/2009 23:06

And you are with him why exactly?????????

He sounds horrible

I hope your IBS improves soon - It sounds like their are more problems in your relationship than just this problem though

I would be tempted to put laxatives in his dinner and see how he likes spending all day running to the loo

MaryMotherOfCheeses · 01/01/2009 23:06

That sounds absolutely awful, pignata. I'm shocked for you.

Is he normally such a git?

leoleosuperstar · 01/01/2009 23:07

Is he normally like this?
IBS is quite painful as well as .
Poor you.

leoleosuperstar · 01/01/2009 23:07

Also obviously YANBU

Penthesileia · 01/01/2009 23:09

YANBU! Poor you!

Put industrial quantities of laxatives in his food, and see how he likes having to go to the toilet all the time.

Yurtgirl · 01/01/2009 23:10

Sorry I said "it sounds like there are more problems than just this" - based on nothing at all that you said!

I just assumed that if he can be such an arse on this issue then he presumably is horrid to you about other stuff as well.

To belittle you in front of your friends is particularly nasty.

BoffinMum · 01/01/2009 23:10

Totally utterly YANBU.
He's practically giving you IBS, behaving like this.

Bicnod · 01/01/2009 23:10

what a complete bastard

poor you... is this normal behaviour for him?

SoupDragon · 01/01/2009 23:11

Did you destroy any Glockenspiels at this get together?

scrooged · 01/01/2009 23:12

I have a sachet of Kleanprep you can have. Horrible stuff, mix it with a litre of water/juice then spend all night on the toilet.

JasperCarrot · 01/01/2009 23:12

What a twat!

YADefNBU

ComeWhineWithMe · 01/01/2009 23:14

You do know he is bullying you .

This is awful of him to do he is a complete nob .

I agree with the others about laxitives and while he is sat on the bog sit and make fun of him what a wanker he is .

Original poster
Pignata · 01/01/2009 23:17

He's like it all the time but I am feeling so awful tonight. I'm worried about my health, he is being a bastard, our 'friends' are laughing at me and I really wanted a good start to the new year.
The doctor has given me some granual things but all they do is give me diarreah

OP posts:
katch · 01/01/2009 23:18

How vile. Btw, stress is a major factor in IBS - beibg arouns someone like that will exacerbate your problem.

Giving up wheat and dairy temporarily might help, or a general food exclusion diet. But you might already know the cause.

Bicnod · 01/01/2009 23:19

CMWWM is right - he is bullying you. How long has this been going on for? Have you spoken to anyone about this before?

Alambil · 01/01/2009 23:19

could you tell him to buck up or piss off ?

he is bullying you and humiliating you; "all the time" .... not good, not necessary and not at all loving

Yurtgirl · 01/01/2009 23:20

Just realised you are stuck upstairs! I would go to bed and try to recover. In the morning I would initiate a discussion/argument! No way should he treat you like this

IBS is hardly something you asked for, or can help is it?

Sympathies from me

Lotster · 01/01/2009 23:20

Pignata, you poor thing. His behaviour sounds quite abusive TBH.

You shouldn't put on a brave face or laugh it off. If he doesn't realise how hurtful and embarrassing his mocking, name-calling and putting you down in front of other people is, then firstly you need to tell him. It is also surely embarrassing for people seen to be laughing along with him, when they are probably mortified.

If he's unmoved by it, maybe you should then tell him organisations such as Women's Aid would class these things as being part of an abusive releationship. Hopefully he'll realise he's gone too far and feel bad, and if he doesn't then you need to have a good long think about your relationship hon, in sickness and in health should mean something, and you deserve more support.

JasperCarrot · 01/01/2009 23:21

some friends eh?

I would go downstairs and blast him

completely humiliate him the way he has you

and watch these so called friends squirm in their seats