To cry over DH?

[Pignata]

DH has just told me that I ruined New Years Eve because I kept going to toilet and leaving him with "the others". By "the others" he means my family.

I have IBS and my stomach has really been playing up over christmas. Yesterday it was really painful. I decided not to drink incase it made it worse (it would have done) and DH said I was being a miserable cow and trying to spoil the party.

Today it has been worse. Everytime I go to toilet DH shouts after me "here she goes again, shitty arse" he made me cry earlier. Anyone else's DH would be supportive and maybe even sympathetic and I feel so angry that he treats me like this when I'm unwell.

Well I've just been to toilet and DH shouted up the stairs to stop showing off and seeking attention. This he said in front of 3 of our friends and they all started laughing. I've not been downstairs since. Great start to the new year.

Poor you

I really wouldn't do the laxatives thing... it's not worth the aggro that will come afterwards. I would put my energies into working out a plan for the future...

x x

He sounds like another controlling, abusive, narcissistic bully. How dare he treat you like that. He deserves an entire box of laxatives in one go, so have fun imagining it, but as other posters have said dont do it. X

He sounds vile but getting back at him will not help, or change him, or make you feel any better (perhaps for about 2 minutes, but then you'll feel horrible that you lowered yourself to his level - trust me - i fantasised about hurting or humiliating my ex for a long time but never did it, and am bloody glad now that I was the 'nice' person and have nothing to be ashamed of.

You need to make a plan of how you're going to get out of the situation. Nobody is making you be with him and nobody can. So don't accept it any more.

I hope we can help you to escape this horrendous relationship.

Absolutely do not do the laxatives thing it would be very dangerous and could get you into a lot of trouble!

Remember people can only treat you badly if you let them. You can't stop him being an arsehole but you can refuse to tolerate it and leave or kick him out or stand up to him.

Good luck with whatever you decide.

Yes don't do laxatives. Keep your dignity. So so many people have said your dh's behaviour is out of order and you know it yourself too I'm sure.
Do you have a trusted friend or family member in RL you could talk this through with (entirely confidentially) and who might be able to help practically (e.g could you and ds stay with them if you did decide to leave, help pick up ds or whatever is needed)
The dynamic between you and your dh sounds so unhealthy you may need some space from him to think clearly.

Did you go to A&E to get your arm popped back in? If so they should have also hopefully been able to put your mind at rest regarding your iron tablets, anaemia, diarrhoea and black stool.
Hope your arm isn't too tender as I believe dislocation of the shoulder can make grown men cry in pain.

He has no right to be so disrespectful towards you (and that is putting it mildly). Truly appalling behaviour. Agree don't do the laxative thing. Hope you are feeling better soon. {{hugs}} xxx

Oh poor you, I would make getting shot of your selfish uncaring husband a New Years Resolution.

I have IBS too and know how embarrassing it is and you certainly don't need someone who is supposed to love you, making things worse.

How are things today?

Yes, how are you? How's your arm?

I know the issue is your not so DH but I was wondering if you've tried different things for your IBS? I had omeprazole and something beginning with an M that I can't for the life of me remember. But they were good. Only thing bad was that I had to take them 3 times a day.

Your H is horrible. He seems to uncaring. Maybe you could go and stay with your mum for a bit?

Hi Pignata - how are things today? Have been thinking about you x

.

Have things improved Pignata? Thinking of you x

I hope she's OK. She hasn't posted since she said about her arm. Pignata, if you're around can you even just post a quick update with if you're OK or not, even if you don't want to say anything else?

I know, it's always worrying when you read posts like this and then the OP disappears. I really hope you're okay Pignata. We just want to know you're fine and then we'll leave you alone xx

Seen Pignata posting on other threads on the 3rd so assuming she's just had enough of this one? Hope you're ok anyway.

Yep - really hope you're ok Pignata... if you do want to chat anymore just post on this thread again... x

Thank you for all the messages and words of support. I did not come back to this thread because I stupidly led myself to believe I was being OTT. Things escalated again last night however and I'm just so sick of everything. I've gotten to the point where I can't even be bothered to think about it.

You're not being OTT at all- he sounds positively bad for your health and happiness! Thinking of you, and hoping you can draw the strength to get yourself together, you deserve so much better x x

haven't been on the thread before just to say am unclear what op says is causing stomach symptoms is it
1.ibs irritable bowel syndrome which causes crampy pains and diarrhoea or

1. ibd inflammatory bowel disease which is v serious causing pain,blood loss and anaemia

if not sure,better get it checked out asap

So sorry to hear that Pignata. If it's any comfort, we're all here for you if you want to offload the stress. Lots of hugs xx

Hi Pigata - really sorry to hear that things have escalated again. What happened this time? Have you thought any more about phoning the Women's Aid helpline just for some advice? Sending huge hugs x x