Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to be disappointed and quite frankly let down and pissed off with dh for getting me slippers for xmas?!

187 replies

pinktree · 26/12/2008 11:24

Ok so am I or am I being spoilt?

I am angry, 30 wks pregnant and hormonal so don't be too harsh!

Oh and I made a detailed list for him back in November! Although we did only get paid on 20th Dec (Own business,long story, whole other thread!)

I've ordered him to take back everything and he's just gone out now

OP posts:
Nighbynight · 26/12/2008 19:28

ok to be annoyed, not ok to make him take them back. Imo. but what do I know, ex h never gave me anything, and I was too downtrodden to complain (just divorced instead, lol)

NiceShoes · 26/12/2008 19:30

"disappointed and quite frankly let down and pissed off" is when your hubby screws someone else,blows all your money,kicks the dog not buys slipper's

slippers= disapointed
can you see the difference

Theresa · 26/12/2008 19:35

DH asked for slippers and he got them, along with a few other bits and bobs. I bought my own pressies and gave them to him to wrap up with children. Christmas is for the children not us. The only reason we buy each other anything is so they have things to wrap up. I'm a pain in the bum (and a bit of a control freak if i'm honest!!) and DH said to me several times in the 'run up' that he really didnt have anything for me, he wasnt kidding and would i please tell him what i wanted as he knows i dont like surprises (as they usually involve him spending ages in town buying me tat!). I said that was fine, all the stuff I wanted (a new handbag, some bubble bath etc etc) were in the bottom of his wardrobe for him to wrap! YABU to make him take them back, although maybe he could have stuck to the list if you gave him one.

FrostyTheSnowman · 26/12/2008 19:53

If I didn't get slippers I would be disappointed.

Original poster
pinktree · 26/12/2008 20:02

Well just to annoy you all even more dh apologised to me when he got home! Runs and hides.

Obviously I've rocked some peoples boats quite a lot and I'm sorry if I've offended anyone.

However I know my worth

OP posts:
NAB3hundredChristmaslights · 26/12/2008 20:04

Sorry, but.

You DO sound spoilt.

izyboy · 26/12/2008 20:06

'course you're worth it! Pregnancy can make some people feel a bit frumpy and ..well..slippers can have connotations of ..unsexiness. I was given a food processor for my 21st from an ex BF. He had to take THAT back too!

NiceShoes · 26/12/2008 20:07

dont think anyone feeling offended or boats rocked.you are not that worth it,hun

izyboy · 26/12/2008 20:08

..if that sounds spoilt well he only bought me that because he wanted me to make guacamole like his mother...I dont think so!

Zebraa · 26/12/2008 20:08

Your DH is a lucky man. Bet he feels really special and appreciated.

bohemianbint · 26/12/2008 20:10

erm....was just having a bit of a chuckle over this thread and told DH about it, and he said

"He gave a pregnant woman slippers she didn't want after she'd told him what she did want?! Snurk...."

tiredsville · 26/12/2008 20:13

Well done Pinktree

Tortington · 26/12/2008 20:19

i would be disapointed to say the least. and i think you did the right thing entirely - i cannot for the life of me see why this is an issue

Joolyjoolyjoo · 26/12/2008 20:20

Can nobody see it's not the ACTUAL gift of slippers that is upsetting to the OP, it's what it tells her- ie her dh hasn't listened to her and has disregarded her ideas, buying her instead something that he should KNOW isn't her kind of present. It might also be that, compared to previous years, her dh hasn't made any real effort to get something she would like. And it might also be what the slippers represent to the OP. To me, DH and I decided to spend less money on each other this year, but he still got me a lovely necklace, as he'd noticed I'd lost my old one. It may be worth the same amount of money as a pair of slippers, but it shows he thinks about me, and buys me a a present for a lover, rather than a mumsy present that isn't really me.

I appreciate that some of you think slippers are a great present, but the OPs partner should maybe have known she wouldn't appreciate them. I'm not saying she was right to insist he take them back this very day, but maybe she isn't behaving quite so badly as many of you seem to think

TWINSETinapeartree · 26/12/2008 20:24

But you can love someone and not buy them presents.

Dp never buys me presents but he loves me, my ex husband lavished me with gifts but was a twat.
As I said before though I understand that especially when pregnant you can read into things.

However if there is more to this then maybe the OP is not being unreasonable/

izyboy · 26/12/2008 20:25

Joolyjoo I think that's what BB's old man was hinting at.

kittywise · 26/12/2008 20:29

interesting pinktree, your 'worth' is about having a go at someone because of the present they dared to buy you.

Lizzylou · 26/12/2008 20:32

I personally hate slippers, I can't stand having hot feet (and have horrendous feet to prove it).

BUT I wouldn't ask anyone to take presents back, that's just rude and ungrateful. OK, I guess you can be excused being 30wks and hormonal.

This year DH gave me a set amount of money and I chose my own clothes. As money is tight at present that was the best present ever.

BUT even when he bought me a 34F (was 36D at the time) Bra and size 10 knickers (was size 14/16 at time) for a saucy sexy surprise many moons ago, I never told him, I went and swapped (was very pleased he had thaought I was so much slimmer than I was) and then told him afterwards what my correct sizes were.

mumeeee · 26/12/2008 20:40

I would never order ny DH to take back what he bought me. I actually like geting slippers for Christmas. DD1 21 asked for slippers amongst other things and she loves them,

nooka · 26/12/2008 20:54

Slippers were top of my list this year, but actually I'd quite like to take back the ones that dd and dh bought for me, as they aren't the type that I like (they don't have backs, and I find that very uncomfortable. My family always does lists, and we love each other very much. Writing a list does not mean that you are ungrateful or selfish, it just gives those who love you and want to buy you something you like and want some good ideas. My mother always got us to do them at the beginning of December, and then co-ordinated them for relatives and this year is the first one that my dh has got the idea. It was fab, because otherwise dh just buys himself whatever he wants whenever he wants it, so he is very difficult to buy for (and I think that November and December should be fairly treat free in the build up to Christmas).

Gettign presents that are really wrong is upsetting. Not sure I'd have the balls to send my dh out on Boxing Day though! In the long term being honest is almost certainly worth it though.

AuntieMaggie · 26/12/2008 20:57

"However I know my worth" ???

What the hell is that supposed to mean?

TWINSETinapeartree · 26/12/2008 20:57

I just find it sad the presents seem to be the priority for people at christmas

kittywise · 26/12/2008 20:59

Nooka, I think lists are fine if everyone agrees to them, but just because someone gives you a list I don't think you should feel bound to use it.

I like to be given an idea of what to buy people and am happy to give ideas to others but in no way do i feel they should have to stick to my wish list!

Lizzylou · 26/12/2008 21:00

Am so with you Twinset.

I find nowadays that I forget I even have presents, I'm so wrapped up in the DS's/doing the dinner etc.

Christmas just isn't about presents for me.

nooka · 26/12/2008 21:03

Oh yes, I do agree with you there Kitty. But if you give someone lots of good ideas of things that you would like, and then they give you things that you don't like at all then that's really not good. Of course Christmas is not just about presents, but it is one way of showing someone that you love them, and when it goes totally wrong then it is upsetting.