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AIBU?

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Original poster

To find that parents with kids aged 10 insisting their children believe in Santa are creepy?

209 replies

ssd · 14/12/2008 09:28

I know of some mums who insist their kids believe in santa and the kids are taller than me, whats wrong with kids NOT believing in santa?, doesn't make you a bad parent

OP posts:
kittybrown · 14/12/2008 10:12

Thank you sticksantaupyourchimney I was going to say something along the same lines.
The whole reason for christmas is celebreating the birth of someone who we can't be sure existed of if he did really was the son of God.

jeee · 14/12/2008 10:13

I politely nod when people tell me that their 8 year old still believes (never mind any older). Even in my day every child knew who Father Christmas was before the end of infants - and we were supposed to have grown up less fast than kids today. But we never let our parents know we knew. My sister (33) still told Mum and Dad that Father Christmas was real last Christmas, and sure enough Father Christmas made an appearance for her. Actually, I think he gave my brother (36) presents too.

laweaselmys · 14/12/2008 10:13

It depends how they're encouraging the belief and if the kids really genuinely believe.

Which I reckon is a whole lot less than is made out to be. I certainly made out I believed for years and years despite the fact I knew before I even started primary school that it wasn't true. I just wanted to keep being able to write a list and 'ask' for things, as I wasn't allowed to otherwise!

I think if you're child at 10 came up to you with doubts about Santa and you lied to them to keep up the belief then it's not really fair. It is incredibly unlikely they will get away with believing in Santa at secondary school.

sticksantaupyourchimney · 14/12/2008 10:13

It's no more creepy than believing in Father Christmas. I fail to see a difference. Can anyone give me a sensible explanation for why one is OK when the other isn't?
Religion is harmless fun for otherwise decent individuals, but overall it's probably humankind's most toxic invention.

Idrankthechristmasspirits · 14/12/2008 10:17

OK so i assume you won't be celebrating Christmas then kitty?

Oh how i love all the religion bashing on here, it's completely unacceptable to make racist comments or personally attack a poster but it's absolutely fine to label anyone who follows a religion with all sorts of nasty assumptions.

So far over the last few days on here i have seen christians labelled as "bucketheads", "fantasists", "bigotted twats" and now we are "creepy" too.

Mumsnet has been a fantastic source of help, laughter and sometimes friendship for me over the time i've been here. However the last few days have shown me that this is not really the place for me anymore.

TLESinChristmasStockings · 14/12/2008 10:19

I am 33 and still believe in santa and leave a mince pie, glass of brandy and a carrot out...and no thats not for the dc's lol

Although ds1 10 1/2 still believes in santa.
Why is it creepy to believe in the magic ?

MoChan · 14/12/2008 10:24

I believe in Santa and I'm 35.

QOD · 14/12/2008 10:29

My dd is 10 in 4 days, she beleives. But we do live ina small village and she is one of the oldest in her school year, Yr5, so most of her pals are just 9.
Next year will be her last year of belief, I will make sure she knows before secondary schooL!

Coldtits · 14/12/2008 10:29

I "believed" until I was about 12 or 13.

Mum took me aside and asked me if I really did believe ... I asked her if I would still get presents.

But I actually stopped Believing when I was 8. I just dragged it out for fun. Children who play power rangers, or vampire vets, or kung fu panda pirates don't believe they are really the character they are playing, they just allow themselves to get caught up in the fantasy of the game, and it's the same with Father Christmas. They don't really genuinely believe, not like a four year old does, they are just playing the part of a child who blieves in Santa

Coldtits · 14/12/2008 10:31

Personally I will stop bashing religions (note, I do not bash religious people) when religions stop telling me my children are going to Hell.

NotDoingTheHousework · 14/12/2008 10:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

fluffles · 14/12/2008 10:52

I was the older child and i pretended to my parents that i believed for years for the sake of my little brother.

I didn't really believe but i knew it was a little pretend game that grownups played to make christmas special - in many ways i didn't want to burst THEIR bubble.

I don't think there's anything wrong with that.

But if a ten year old did GENUINELY believe i'd start to wonder about their skills of logical deduction and critical thinking .

kittybrown · 14/12/2008 11:11

Idrankthechristmasspirits I wasn't bashing religon. I was trying to point out that believing in something that might or might not be real is not that creepy. Millions of people belive in thigs whether it's Father Christmas, Jesus, the Tooth Fairy, St Nicklaus or God. It's not that different. I don't personally believe in the whole Bible and nothing but the Bible. I do how ever try and live my life by a vaguely religious ethos. Treat others how I wish to be treated, love thy neighbour etc. I dislike the inflexiblity of belief in many religions. Actually I dislike inflexibility of beiefs and intolerance full stop.
I will be celebrating christmas, I will be looking back over the past year and will be thankful for what we have.

dingdongmerrilyonpie · 14/12/2008 11:13

10 year olds don't believe in Santa

They're just humouring their creepy parents

daftpunk · 14/12/2008 11:15

my ds will be 9 on boxing day...i still talk to him about father christmas....whether he still believes in him i don't know? but i think it's ok....i know i believed till i was about 12.

DumbledoresGirl · 14/12/2008 11:20

As far as I am aware, my dd aged 8, but nearer 9, still believes in FC. I don't think it makes me creepy, and I definitely don't think it makes me a better parent, except is so far as I have attempted to keep my daughter a little girl and not make her into a pre-teen before her time.

I don't like probing into this particular belief in my children tbh. What should I say to my dd? "Do you still believe in FC?" Wouldn't that give the game away if she did still believe in him? I don't want to be the one to spoil the fantasy, if that is the case. It is irrelevant to me whether she believes or not. I will still do her a stocking.

Also, as I have a 5 yo ds who has no reason not to believe in FC, I feel that the less said in our house about the fact that FC is not real, the better. Why should he lose out on a few more years of the fantasy?

I am proud of my 2 older sons who obviously know where the presents come from really but have kept quiet about it in front of their sister and brother. They are not normally so sensitive!

Lilymaid · 14/12/2008 11:21

DS1 wrote down his proofs of the non-existence of Santa when he was 7 (terribly analytical logical child) and gave them to me. However, he added that he still expected his stocking and, years on, is happy to wear a Santa hat. He will get a stocking as usual at Christmas (he is 21) but I no longer have to make teeth marks in a carrot for Rudolph or get DH to decant the glass of whisky back into the bottle!

Nemostwonderfultimeoftheyear · 14/12/2008 11:24

I used to help my parents put out gifts from santa to my sisters at the age of 15 yet I still 'believed' obviously not in a santa as such but just in a little magic and excitment. They also always kept a surprise present back for me.
I dont think there is anything wrong with a 10yr old believing or their parents thinking its nice they do. There is so much seriousness and responsibility even on young children now that whats wrong with a little magic?

Podrick · 14/12/2008 11:26

What is odd is the equation of how good a parent you are with how long your child continues to believe in Santa Claus which is clearly tosh

Not something I have ever come across though

edam · 14/12/2008 11:30

there was a news story the other day with parents outraged because a supply teacher had told their kids FC didn't exist. I was surprised when I realised these were nine and ten year olds and even more surprised that the parents demanded the headteacher tell them he did. It is a shame if someone else bursts the bubble, but a bit odd to tell a downright lie to an older child who will find out pretty soon anyway.

(I don't think FC is a 'lie', it's legend, myth and magic, but denying the involvement of your parents in keeping that magic alive when a kid is eight or older seems a bit extreme.)

Saturn74 · 14/12/2008 11:30

I don't know how you can insist that someone believes something.

Either they do or they don't.

DS1 is 12, and still believes. He has never asked the question, so I've never told him. He knows most of his friends don't believe, but it doesn't bother him.

DS2 is 10, and asked the question before Christmas last year. He categorically wanted to know the truth, so I told him.

He keeps the secret for the benefit of his older brother and for his friends, which is lovely, I think.

I don't think it's creepy.

I find other people getting wound up about it a bit odd, tbh.

Why should anyone else care?

edam · 14/12/2008 11:31

Oh, and I found out when I was five and it didn't bother me - I still kind of believed in a hopeful, willing-suspension-of-disbelief way even though I'd seen my parents wrapping the presents!

newpup · 14/12/2008 11:32

creepy!! I think anyone who wants to willfully spoil a bit of harmless make believe for children is a bit creepy!

Generations of children have gone along with the whole father Christmas tradition. There is so much horridness in the world why oh why would you want to take away such a lovely harmless tradition?

Children grow up so quickly, let them be children as long as possible.

CrackopentheBaileys · 14/12/2008 11:32

I dread the moment my ds aged 8 asks me 'does Santa really exist?'
Because I won't lie to him, if he's asking he obviously has doubts. But that little bit of Christmas magic will be gone, and I actually think he'll be really disappointed....btw he still believes in the tooth fairy too!

Saturn74 · 14/12/2008 11:33

I've never heard anyone suggest the 'my child still believes, therefore I am a good parent' idea either, Podrick.

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