to feel uncomfortable being served by woman with tourettes that kept swearing at me?

[racmac]

I went to a well known high street store and was served by a lady who had tourettes. I have no problem with this or any of her ticks BUT she kept saying cunt and wanker - i dont use these words in front of my children so dont expect others to AIBU in expecting that she shouldnt be serving customers?

It was rather disconcerting to be told "thats £20.00 please, cunt, wanker"

Racmac

wish we could here hercules! In this city we cant even get on the farking buses.

Yes, Ruddynorah,that is what I meant.

Please don't try and club me together with those who think it's indecent to have SN people out in the community.

No Anna- I mean he should be better supervised tbh. I know there's a fine line between independence and supervision, but in this case discreet shadowing to teach appropriate behaviour would be better (he clearly has the ability to be taught this 'rule'- no masterbating on public transport- if he's travelling independently). It's not fair on him to expose him in this way. If he has LD's he is vulnerable and in this case is being put in vulnerable position.

sad isn't it..that some people think it is indecent for this woman to have these tics in their presence...while others feel it is indecent that she shouldn't be allowed to do this job.

You see disablities that don't make people feel uncomfortable are deemed to be okay but those that make people squirm a little should be shielded from delicate eyes and ears. What a wonderful world eh?

I don't understand why this lady can't be given another job, one where she will not be talking to unsuspecting clients every minute of every day.

Can I also point out that it is a small proportion of people with TS that actually have complex verbal (foul language) tics.

Maybe she likes her job?

She could if she asked cote. But if not - if she wants to do this job then under the DDA she really can't be moved. Pretty much the only thing that the DDA will allow discrimination for is health and safety. Which this just isn't.

I think discrimination is itself indecent.

I hold my hand up and say at the start of this thread I wasn't sure and I wasn't sure why I wasn't sure IYKWIM. After all, if she had had DS or a physical impairment I wouldn't have even thought about it. So much so that I wouldn't have been thinking well done M&S, I just wouldn't have considered it strange/unusual at all.

I think it was more to do with the swearing than the disability. As I said, my problem. This thread has challenged me though.

I'm going to be a pain and ask if someone could briefly describe the offensive part of the advert as I can't find it anywhere, unless it's the one where the athlete shatters into pieces.

maybe having her stay right where she is would help the general public become less unsuspecting?

I am not that bothered about social acceptability, but it does bother me immensely that people want to hide away anyone who's a bit different in case they challenge a few people, or make a few children think a bit about the world. You don't need to have a child with SN to be upset and offended by that.

Obviously this is pure speculation, but when I look at the DS young man, he is clearly much loved and cared for (he is exceptionally well groomed for someone with a disability, so someone obviously puts a lot of effort into making him look good) and I am sure his parents and whoever supervises him during the day would be horrified to know he masturbates on the bus. And because this is a very nice area, he doesn't get beaten up on the bus - but little old ladies and mothers of young children get off the bus because they just don't want to see this - because it is "socially unacceptable behaviour", there is no getting away from it, even in someone with SN.

I think the advert showed a child ending up in a wheelchair because they ran across the road.

This thread has changed my mind. She's as capable of doing the job as anyone, presumably she takes and processes the payment, gives change and a receipt.

A few swear words doesn't alter the fact that she's doing her job and while it can be shocking to hear, I'd much rather hear cursing from someone who can't help it than from those who can and have no excuse for swearing in public.

Nobody has suggested that this woman can/cannot work.

Nobody has suggested that this woman is unfit to do a job.

Nobody has suggested we 'put her in the back'.

Nobody has been disrespectful towards this womans condition.

The only thing people are suggesting is that she would be better suited to a job where she wasn't swearing and using words such as 'cunt' and 'wanker' in front of young children.

And yes I do think it's awful that so many of you have a relaxed attitude towards swearing in front of young children. For goodness sake, we're not talking about teeneagers, we're talking about 3/4 year old, small children. The mind boggles, it really does. I'll say it again, awful!

Once again people are becoming overly sensative and jumping on the bandwagon. The only thing the op and others have suggested on this thread is that we would be shocked if this happened to us. Can I please remind those who have children with disabilites that not everybody's children do, therefore it may be your norm but it isn't ours. I for one am not used to life with a disabled child around, nor adults for that matter. Sometimes things shock us becasue we aren't overly aware of them in our day to day lives, that isn't our fault it's just unknown to us. Therefore when I see or hear someone with a diability it can shock me and it can upset me, because I'm not used to it.

We also think it a bit inappropriate to have a woman with tourettes of this kind to be serving the public when there are small children around. I would be shocked if this sitation had happened to me, but if it was just me then it's not very nice to hear but it's one of those things. I wouldn't want my daughter to hear it though. That's not bing precious, that's me parenting the way I feel is right.

Every one of us are given jobs depending on our personal strengths and weaknesses - someone who is good with numbers but not great with people will be working at accounting or financial planning and not at customer service.

If you can't control your language, whether because of a disorder or not, you would not be very good at a customer service position. Just like someone suffering from Multiple Sclerosis would not be a very good skiing instructor.

What is wrong with finding jobs that fit the abilities of each person?

'he is exceptionally well groomed for someone with a disability'

really? Cos usually disabled people smell and are unkempt right?

so if your reaction is because you are unused to seeing people with disabilities it's a good thing that people like this lady are working with the public, non?

what about their colleagues cotedazur? or should they be in an office on their own and eat the lunch on their own and keep away from public transport?

No, needmorecoffee. But he has expensive clothes, a very good haircut etc - someone is putting an exceptional amount of energy into making this young man make the very best of himself.

'Therefore when I see or hear someone with a diability it can shock me and it can upset me, because I'm not used to it. '

oh ffs. Get used to it. Educate yourself.

Actually Cote, I'd probably be a great ski instructor cos I am bossy. I have MS.

Small children do not melt when they hear a swearword. I'm astounded by how overly sensitive some people are. If you're that sensitive, keep them inside till they are 18.

This thread is hilarious.

I am now off to apply for the job of principal violinist with the Royal Philarmonic Orchestra. The fact that my musical ability is somewhat limited shouldn't be a barrier after all, should it!!

Anna - maybe he is making that effort. Why assume someone else is?