To put my 6 week old baby in to nursery for 1 half day a week so i can have a break?

[babylovesmilk]

I am pregnant with my 3rd child and am planning to put my new baby in nursery from 9 -1, 1 day a week. My other DC will be at school. I had PND with my last child, have no family nearby and think the break will be a life line. AIBU?

Pucca you OK? Sound a bit stresed

(and I DO know what its like- 3 of the intolerant ones!)

ope all is well.

OP we have to find ur way through this parenting maze ourselves- do whats best to help you and your family keep healthy. Good luck.

I am arsey because as i predicted, because i am not in the gang of "of course you are not being unreasonable" i am getting flack. I am just stating my experience and my POV, but will back off now.

Also i guess i just do not understand at all. Even though when i had PND i felt like jumping off a bridge at times, i never wanted to be away from my children.

Erm... there is a about a 70% chance of postnatal depression recurring if you have had severe postnatal depression the first time. Its really quite terrifying.

I am shocked by how nasty and judgemental people are. Prehaps posters like pucca are still suffering PND, and this might account for her absolute bitchness. Prehaps if she needs to organise a bit of respite.

Just because other mothers go through hell does not mean that babylovesmilk has to. What she is suggesting is not illegal and I am sure the baby won't suffer in anyway.

I ask the question again. If I put a six week old baby in the sports centre creche so that I can take my six year old son swimming is it any different? What about if I use the sports centre creche and go to gym while my son is at school.

this is

My Dh will be taking a few weeks off and the I have doula coming for the next 3 weeks to get my dc ready for school and take them. (I think this will be a massive help)

pucca you need to take a chill pill.

you where the one that said all nb's do is sleep.

I'm not surprised you're Reallytired if you plan on spending 4 hours in the gym or swimming

Hi Peachy... I am fine, thanks for asking, just feeling like alot of other around MN i suppose hence why i don't post that often now.

I am not being bitchy, i am fighting my personal corner, i guess i am just of the old school variety and thats why i just don't understand why anyone would want to put their 6 week old baby in nursery for any length of time. Besides which as someone else has pointed out what difference is a few hours going to make to the mum anyway? if you are going to get PND it will happen regardless.

Reallytired - check the sports centre - ours has a creche but won't take children under 6 months!

this isnt about what you would all do.it is BLM trying to reduce the potential impact of pnd

BLM Look at ofsted homepage go to search by postcode use drop down menu select nursery

4 hours MAY make no difference to me gatting PND but it will give me some child free time. I want to at least try and fight it!

twinklemegan, you can get mother's helps from most childcare agencies.
or just look around for one yourself, they're unqualified. they come in to "help" the mum, as the name suggests, and as such don't have sole care of kids, they'#re just there to help out (just explaining that because it might seem weitrd that they're unqualified etc etc)
you could put an ad in a paper for one, or as someone else suggested, look for a student on a childcare course to come out and help for a while each evening or whatever

I couldn't have put my newborn in a creche while taking an older child swimming, either.
I suppose we are all different but I couldn't have been seperated from mine when they were so young without getting upset.

BLM - it's good that you are looking at all the options that might work for you.

4hrs is sleep time,rest time,adequate nutrition,time to protect/maintain ones mental/physical health if at all poss

time to seek support/counselling/peer support

Reallytired... Mmmm yes ok! You are talking bollocks.

My DH is a SAHD, an old SAHD (I'm sure he won't mind me saying that...) and when I went back to work we made the joint decision to put DS into nursery for half a day a week to give him a break. Now obviously DS was 5 months so older than BLM's baby will be, but the principle is the same.

DH really looked forward to that half day and it did him no end of good. On the flip side, I take half a day off week each week (compressed hours) to spend with DS - that means all the world to me. It's simply not true that half a day a week isn't worth it. The promise of a break can really help you cope.

Pucca - no need to try and turn this into a slanging match. What is your problem?

babyslovemilk - no of course YANBU - you are being very sensible and well planned

Enjoy those few hours peace and quiet and promise me you will not use them to catch up on housework!

mygreat

There is no chance of that!

My motto: "An immaculate house is the sign of a wasted life"

mygreat

I am so with you on that.

My friend recently had her 3rd, leaving her with 3 under 4 years old. She advertised in the local paper for an occasional nanny/mothers help and has found a wonderful woman who entertains her three for a couple of afternoons a week leaving her peace to ummm catch up on housework.

Is it worth considering this option rather than nursery, as it may well work out roughly the same cost, and means that you will get a break without your new DC being in an unfamiliar environment ?

babylovesmilk, when ds3 was a premmie newborn, I had to go to ds2's school once a week every week for a course on how to help ds2 with reading. I left ds3 with MIL for a couple of hours. Aside from my suspicion that MIL put ds3 off taking bottles ( she can be a bit forceful with bottles!) ds3 came to no harm and in any case, I needed to do it for ds2. I can't see any difference in your case except that you obviously don't have a Mum or MIL nearby to take up the slack and a 6 week old is not going to know who is looking after him, he will want to be fed and burped and changed and after that will not give a monkey's!
Pucca, I do know where you are coming from, I am a bit like you in that I try to do it all myself but you know what? We won't get any medals for it and our babies won't remember anyway!

I think being narrow minded about parenting is a sign of insecurity. I think that postnatal depression can really cloud common sense. Its why depression is next to impossible to shake off without professional help.

We all have different circumstances. Prehaps some posters are unable to understand that. They are too blinkered in thinking that everyone is the same as them. I see no reason to "fight my corner", parenting is not a boxing match.

Personally I would not use a nursery at 6 weeks for a whole morning, but I can see the sense in babylovesmilk doing so. Taking the boxing ring analogy the blue corner has a different view to the red corner. Both views are valid.

juuule, I am not going to stop loving my son when my baby comes. There will be times when he comes first and the baby second as well as vice a versa. My son loves swimming and needs the exercise. He is still little and needs qualtiy time with his Mummy.

Taking him swimming once a week will be away of giving him one to one time. My baby won't die for being seperated from me for two hours at the very most.

I am also surprised that a gym creche would take babies from 6 weeks - neither of the gyms I've belonged to would - both had 12 weeks as the minimum age, and with each the time was limited to 1 session i.e. about 1 and a half hours.

That's just my local experience though. I didn't use them because you have to be on site for the time the children are there and I took dd swimming at weekends instead.

No problem, then, RT. Just saying that I couldn't have done it. Would probably have gone with the w/e swim like pooka said.