To feel a bit sad for children in nurseries 8-6 every day?

[SlightlySad]

It struck me yesterday as I took DS2 to the aquarium then for a walk along the seafront that he was very lucky to be doing this. He'd had a few hours chilling out in the morning, taken his big brother to school, had a fun trip out, then back home for a nap.

If he had been in nursery since 12 weeks, then he wouldn't be doing half the things that he does - mother and toddlers, soft play, baby classes, singing classes, trips to the park, pre-school sessions... I know that some nurseries do these things, but it's not every day, and these are the better nurseries. Some children must spend most of their week in one room. I think this would drive DS2 mad.

I'm very lucky in not working, but this isn't a SAHM vs WOHM issue. I just think if I had to go out to work, that I would choose a childminder to care for my children rather than sending them to a nursery.

If you chose a nursery, does yours do lots of extra stuff? Do the children leave the nursery building/garden often? Why did you go with a nursery and not a CM?

i am NEVER EVER bored

i dont get the assumption that i am

the only negative word i would use to describe my life atm is 'stressful'

I love my life and and am at peace with my choices

i do not like being told on here that i am either a smug bastard or dull as ditchwater

LOL - Xenia as a military feminist. And why not?

But wouldn't young children/babies of working women have been cared for by their family members? There wasn't a Little Shits Nursery on every High Street.

Notanotter/asif/et al would like to think that we're missing out blueshoes!

Which suggests that maybe they're not quite as content as they try to make out!

its a question of being a role model - being a mother is part of who I am - a very important part but to do it properly I need to show that you can make your own way in the world , have an independent life (and independence includes being financially independent) and its very hard to be able to do that whilst sahm imo.

its not something new - as pointy says working/being a mother wasn't seen as different but what is unfortunately knew is the vitriol/guilt that seems to surround this decision..

What are you missing out on? About 50hrs a week of their company! Leaving you with, by my calculations, about 34 hrs a week. So logically you're missing out on more than half of everything that they ever do say or think. All those precious special moments, alongside all the nasty nappy moments admittedly!

slightlysad - I would guess that neithe of your DCs go to school yet do they?

Which goes back to my earlier point about you not being a very experienced parent (which is how your posts come across)

Once your DCs go to school you will understand about structure

I suspect you line up all of these endless dytime activities to give yourself some feeling of structure - when they go to school you will be governed by school runs, after shool activies (often having to wait with one child, whilst another is in a class, or at a party) , play dates, sleepovers, dragging toddlers into parent/teacher meetings, homework, PE kits etc etc - all very child centred I can assure you and something working mothers are all to familiar with as well as SAHMs

Do you serisuly think that WOHMs don't cuddle their children or something? [shock

It seems to me as though you are trying to make yourself feel better about the fact that your job didn't pay enough to justify you working with two pre school DCs, by making lists of things you imagine WOHMs miss out on

I have had several years worth SAHM/working f/t/workin p/t/commuting/working from home etc etc i.e. have first hand experience of all of these variations and can reassure you that children of women who work do not miss out on the things on your list - I don't feel my DCs had better quality parnting when I was at home - they just had a larger quantity of it and a less upbeat Mum

WOHMs are typically extraordinarily good at time management