To have reported these builders ?

[beanieb]

At lunch time I walked to the nearest shops to work and passed a site where there are retirement homes being built. As I walked by a couple of builders whistled and shouted 'oy' . I noticed a sign outside the site saying something about 'considerate construction' so rang it immediately! I wasn't rude but I did point out that shouting at people walking by was hardly considerate.

Why do I feel so guilty then!? MEH!

"Do you think they will lose their job? Maybe they shouldn't be behaving so rudely towards strangers on the street then. I don't feel quite so guilty now I have read your response grin"

No I never did shout phwoar at a bloke I faniced

Perhaps I'm v. uptight.

might have said it quietly to friend

not cat called it and whistled him though

They are not going to lose their jobs. I've had conversations with my dad about this (40+ years in the construction industry) and he would only sack someone over something like this if they'd already got a stack of warnings/disciplinaries for other things and he wanted to get rid of them anyway.

WilyWombat, I'm not even sure why catcalling and the suchlike makes me feel inferior, but trust me, it does. One moment, you are walking down the street, lost in your private thoughts and happily anonymous. The next minute, some entitlement-minded fuckwit has drawn attention to you in a really embarrassing way, in public. One minute I'm me, the next I'm this thing to be stared at. It does my head in.
I used to shout back, but now I try to ignore, because shouting back only made the comments worse, especially if you had to pass that way again.

Not at all I can see nothing in what they did that was "designed to make you feel inferior" obviously you can but you posted in AIBU and quite as you asked yes I think YABU - if you just wanted agreement perhaps not the right section to post under?

Well if you were 40 stone, with a ladybeard, wearing a short skirt and wellies then they are obviously being abusive and I can understand your indignation but if you are within the boundaries of what could be considered attractive they they are obviously just saying "oh she looks nice"

I really dont want to get into a scrap with the angry people - you asked aibu, I gave you my opinion.

This thread is astonishing - and depressing.

I'm obviously an ugly old grunt (I've been called hysterical and uptight many times before, btw - usually by men when I won't sleep with them) because I don't get wolf-whistled these days; it dropped off dramatically when I hit 40.

And it's a relief.

Like most women, I used to get wolf whistles/comments/leery looks etc, every single time I left the house. And most of the time, it didn't bother me overmuch - I got used to it, as you do. But I do remember how horrible it was when I was in my early teens, and didn't really understand it or how to handle it. You hit puberty and suddenly you're under siege, aren't you? Some 12 year olds may like that, but I think it's really unedifying how many grown-up men (and not just builders) are happy to engage in what is basically sexualised bullying of children.

Not such a big deal once you're grown up, by and large. But I still disliked that sense that as soon as you leave the house you have to be prepared for passing strangers to comment on various bits of your body, and then be vilified if you don't smile or giggle. I'm also surpised at how many posters have made a distinction between the OP's experience and the difference it would have made if she had had children with her, for example. I don't think men who wolf whistle/yell at women in the street are much bothered about how vulnerable/offended/comfortable the women are feeling. If they're prepared to do one, they're prepared to do the other, I'll bet. And as for seeing it as a COMPLIMENT, some kind of affirmation of your attractiveness - well, words fail me.

Oh and I was always too shy to catcall random men but I had friends who would.

So when your 14 yr old dd comes home fuming because some builder has whistled at her, will you tell her to get a grip and get used to it?

Err no grown men shouldnt be ogling children

good for you OP! They will just get told to stop, and they will.

Well I'm sorry to remind you, but it starts around then

So when she's 18 suddenly overnight it will be OK will it? (She'll have been subjected to it for about 4 years by then and will be used to it)

From the boss's perspective, they should be getting on with their work, not annoying passing women.

It does start in the teens. I remember it happening to me, and talking about it to girl friends at school. To begin with, we were horrified, then we started shouting things back.
It isn't a backhanded or inept compliment, it's a little power trip. I can take a compliment, but an embarrassing sleazy comment it just that.

compliment my arse

The same builders you lot claim are giving compliments to adult women, are also catcalling 15 year old girls when you're not there.

Still think it's harmless fun?

lcd lcd lcd

dear god,

we have had

black people

disabled peeple

and now they are all paedos

seriously!

i was flashed at by a man in a rain man when i was about 7.

that doesn't mean all men wearing rain macs ...are flashers....just bad dressers.

So you're in favour of grown men catcalling and whistling children are you Custy?

I don't think anyone said builders were paedos except you custardo.

But the habitual harassment women are supposed to accept with a cheery grin, begins round about 13 or 14.

Builders don't know when your DD's 18th birthday is. They just see her tits.