To get slightly fed up with post's about 'gifted and talented' children

[MrsMertle]

because I think some of them are just an excuse for parents to show off, when what they really want to say is "look at my DC, they are so much cleverer than yours!!"

Sorry, did I miss something? Not all special needs have to be in a wheelchair. My friends ds is now 18yrs but is speech impaired. To look at him you wouldn't think he had sn. God help everyone if the only people included ha.ve to be in a wheelchair.

I never said that.
I used it as an example as to why you can't compare the 2.

i wonder if this boy is on G & T ?

DS1 (usually fairly levelheaded) was getting bored and antsy at school, his work started slipping - he went on the G&T thingy and started doing Maths and ICT extensions that pushed him and intrigued him and he regained an interest in school. Sorted.

DS2 was struggling at school, losing interest in school and falling behind. SENCO got involved (was already statemented for speech problems) and he was assessed for Dsylexia and given additional help. Also sorted.

DD is also being put forward for SALT, school is dealing with that too.

I couldn't give a monkey's what label the school or DoE want to put on my children if it means that they get the help and encouragement they need to be happy and do well (to the best of their abilities) at school. Simiarily I don't care if I'm being alternatively envied/pitied or whatever the hell the problem is over these labels.

If you don't like the threads, don't read them, but don't bother telling us you're fed up like the problems ours rather than yours.

Good post serenity.

I truly believe gifted kids need extra help. Now I thin sn kids come first because there's the difference there for many between basic independence and not but g&t is important.

My friend is exceotional- I can't give too many details as she is easy to id as she is so exceptional, but fully paid scholarship / head girl/ mega success at high flyers career etc

and huge social issues that I beleive could have been remedied with the right support but have made her life much harder.

I;m glad the schools run programs; I was G&T level Enhlish easily (and in Sn classes for maths before anyone thinks i'm bragging!) and had to have special classes with the head, I really was reading at 2- but when the head's time got busy, I got left in the corner ang became both bored and a complete pita; it was only recently I got my education finally sorted.

It's good its a separate topic- sometimes in an evil bitter moment I want to go on threas that say 'my ten mnth old ca walk' and say 'so could mine and he has a verbal age of a decade above actual; he's also asd, aggressive and unikely to get or keep much of a job'. Which I think is understandable, but so is the need to find a peer group which is what this section represents as much as sn.

I think it's fine for giftedness to be regarded a special educational need. To suggest it compares with not being able to say a single word though - i.e. to compare it with a disability is offensive.

I never said that the problem was not mine serenity, I am a primary school teacher and so the problem is very much mine too.

As I have said before, in my experience the G+T programme does help some pupils but for the vast majority it causes unhappiness and stress.

I am talking from experince. I am really, genuinely pleased that your child has had a positive experience but a lot of children don't. This is because they are labelled as G+T when they aren't they are just above average but have been placed on G+T register to make the school look good.

Please look at the bigger picture. Surely you can see that in these cases being labelled as G+T is not a good thing!?

Sorry, my fault. I should have put special educational needs not special needs. I hang my head in shame. Having a very bright child does often require the same amount of support and time as having a child with dyslexia. I think that my point about other areas of this site not having the same amount of shit thrown at it as the G&T thread though and was using the SN board as an example. I sincerely appologise if this was wrong of me to do so. I am well aware that some very bright children have SEN, such as aspergers. Parents do make up threads to boast about their child's ability which is wrong.

All those parents who push their children academically are making a bed for themselves. In the years to come their child will rebel, take that 11 year old maths genius who went off to Uni early then dropped out. She's an escort now isn't she? See my point?

Did anyone else see the TV program about the maths olympiad? The teens profiled were all genuinely G&T and nearly all had social difficulties. Most had aspergers, and all had experienced bullying regardless of the kind of secondary school they attended. These genuine G&T children do need extra support, although I doubt that schools are well placed to offer it. However, extreme IQ is so rare that most schools will never have to deal with it. It is ridiculous to suggest that each class of 30 will have a couple of G&T children, even if it is a superselective independent.

A friend of mine was sent a letter to say that her dd was G&T at gymnastics. However, the school did not offer any practical advice, just told parents that they should enrol her in a gym club

'Having a very bright child does often require the same amount of support and time as having a child with dyslexia'

and very ofen the two go hand in hand

someone said 'Having a child who is G&T can be just as difficult and demanding as having a child with conventional Special Needs.'

Total and utter bollox. Up 5 times a night? Deal with seizures every week? Spend hours trying to get respite help? Wait 2 hours for an accessible bus to come by? Wake up every fucking morning expecting your child to have died in the night? Been told they have 50% chance of dying before 10?
No?

I have a super bright child and she is a peice of cake compared to my other dd who is severely brain damaged, in a wheelchair and likely to not make 18.
I cant think struggling to answer her questions about electrons is quite as hard as getting epilepsy meds into a child who chokes on liquids.
Gods, some people don't appreciate how lucky they are

My opinion is that the G&T thing is misguided. Agree with some posts above that its really quite rare. IME gifted and talented children tend to be very very annoyingly self conscious and precocious and I get peeved that their parents don't try to teach them how to behave better and not be such big heads.

Also, they burn out quickly. For example, they get through school and then when they leave home for university they fall by the wayside, often finding that their peers at Oxbridge or wherever are just as clever and have caught them up, plus they don't have the psychological hang ups from years of special labelling.

I have never read the threads about gifted and talented children. I think it is a load of bull. This is because I was one, so I feel entitled to say it, having experienced it. Much better to just be treated normally and not have such parental pride/pressure/expectations heaped on you. Anyway, in the old days, such children were just treated normally and just read a lot more proper literature very early on. Which teaches you so many things you don't get in a classroom or mentoring situation: instant and private access to the finest minds and thoughts.

Often those who were gifted at maths seemed be almost at the end of the SN spectrum and slightly autistic. And before people start getting offended, this is the case with a very close friend of mine who did Maths at Cambridge, and also with DH who is very mathmo but a bit "special". Also, because he was so talented at maths and science, he went right through the highest levels of the education system without anyone noticing that he is totally dyslexic.

Well said Riven..........................................................

I have to agree with you there riven. I don't think people think sometimes...

Riven, kinds of puts things into perspective..

but you still can not compare G&T to sn.

course there are degrees. I have a 16 yo who was reading at 2, a 15 with aspergers who is as bright as his sister, a 13 yo with dyspraxia, also bright and dd, brain damaged.
I do have experinece of both you know. And dealing with a gifted child (and dd was incredibly hard work and difficult behaviouraly - she ran away at 14) is easy compared to dealing with a disability.
And yes, I did think dealing with dd1 was tough as she was so emotional and tense and flew off the handle at any thing. BUT its nothing like dealing with SN.
No-one, when a proffessional says 'your child is gifted and talented' gets that awful heart freeze you get when someone says 'your child is
People who say 'being G&T is like SN' have no idea what they are talking about.

and if someone would like to swap, they can have dd and I'll have their G&T child. But I bet not one person would swap the G&T label and percieved difficulties for a SN?

oh be careful saintriven they will all be stampeding to swap with you.................not.
I gate bloody angry with people who try to compare the two. why would anyone want their child to be disabled ffs, cos that is what the term sn is used for these days.

i have distinctly under achieving boys

can i have my own topic dya think

only if I can join and can we have a topic for parents of dc's who only wear black ?

there are vast categories of SN and by comparing Giftedness to some types of SN is ridiculous
However I have a dd (5) with minor SN (she was severe aged 18mths but has improved massively)
She is a delight, happylots of friends etc
My gifted ds1 however has had mental health issues at school (bullying and other things) his giftedness has Bern classed as a special need as well as an SEN at his school
Now while I'd not swap him for dd per se I can certainly assure you that dd has been easier from day one that ds1 has (he's 14)

I think people overreact when the comparison happens
And it is beyond SN vs GT
You would not swap your children regardless of the SN nor would we for our kids however hard they are to parent.

Can we not just say our kids present immense challenges at both ends of the spectrum?
We do not need to prove surely a winner in how awful our kids have it?

And I'm so fed up with primary school teachers who can't use an apostrophe correctly.

A pedant writes.