I know I am but I'm going to do it anyway!

[mytetherisending]

DD2 is now 6mths, has been bf on demand mostly and is fully weaned on 3 meals with desserts, juice from a cup and the occasional snack. She is still demanding night feeds which I feel she shouldn't need if she took good feeds at 10 and 230. Instead she faffs with these and wants milk during the night. I have now decided to quit breast feeding as she will not take bottles- so it is all bottles or none iyswim. I hope that being able to see how much she takes during the day and a gentle prod to take more will reduce night feeding. I have dusted off the GF book which I used with dd1 (and who has only had a handful of disturbed nights since 3mths!) in the hope that the routine will get me some modicum of sleep. I am knackered.

I know it is unreasonable to give up bf for the sake of my sleep, however, dd1 is constantly tired (2.9mths) and is behaving awfully because of it. The baby disturbs her sleep every night

I just needed to vent sorry! Grrr to all those people who say babies get their own pattern and start sleeping eventually- I can't wait til 'eventually' happens!

What Scottish mummy said.

Rather than knocking bfing completely on its head can you chop and change it a bit and give her the chance a couple of times during the day whilst only offering a bottle at night?

marla - I think your views are quite extream tbh - I agree with you on some points but to an extent don't think you're fully appreciating things here. The OP WILL NOT be leaving her dd, indefinitely to scream the house down.

it's another parenting method that's all - hers & many other women's methods - are they all wrong? are those babies less cared for than yours - indeed than mine? cos I'll bet my bottom dollar that every mother does what's right for her DC, the choice that's right for them as a family - not dictated to them by a stranger online.

as I've said before I don't like CC - I didn't have the heart to do it with DS so have suffered the consequences - a DS who's sleep as been hit n miss of late. if a parent who likes CC gets her child going 7-7 then fair play their choice, their baby, their decision.

next you'll be likening CC to child abuse

'barnsley crying produces cortisol which is linked to depression in later life. That's enough for me. '

so I assume your child never crys in your house then?

I agree with Marla-CC just felt wrong for me. You bring this baby into the world and all it knows and needs is you-and you leave him/her to cry.
I would rather co sleep and cuddle than do that

Marla, your post re the cortisol/depression has actually reassured me that my cc was the best thing!!
My Dcs took less than a week out of their lives of cc to learn to settle themselves to sleep at night. After that i had the most well rested contented babies/children you could wish for. I see overtired babies/ toddlers screaming through the day at various intervals as they simply do not get enough sleep.

Mine are definately not on the road for depression if your theory is right.

well it's the same my end you're annoying me. and putting words int he OP's mouth.

I suggest we perhaps both agree to disagree, as we seem to both have strong opinions?

You can always tell you've hit a nerve when the swearing starts... not nice and not necessary..

MTIE - it sounds like you're doing a grand job. What a big baby you have! I totally agree that some babies are just very hungry at an early stage and become so much more settled and content when you start offering solids. As you say, you can't make babies eat something they don't want to eat. It's completely reasonable to follow your own well-informed instincts on this.

On the sleeping issue - I'm amazed at the number of people out there who don't seem to realise that it's in the BABY's interests to get a proper night's sleep, not just the parents' and siblings'. It's part of our job as parents to help them learn to sleep, and to recognise that over-tired babies sometimes do need to be left to settle rather than endlessly picked up and fussed with. I also think it's in everyone's interests for babies to get into a pattern as early as possible of taking most of their food during the day.

Being responsive to your baby doesn't mean accepting whatever pattern it seems to get itself into - it's totally loving and responsive to help babies get the food and sleep we know they need.

yes you are, and perhaps I should have chosen my words better, but you have been spoiling for a fight, your posts are full of self righteousness ('you might like to tell yourself it's kind, but it's not, it's just not, and that's that.' for example) which quite frankly is infuriating, and I actually agree with you in some aspects of your CC points but for the most part, you seem to miss the whole point - this isn't your child, and therefore isn't your choice - it's the OP's choice, (and her Dh's of course)

'Oh so if other people do X it makes it okay to do Y?

'Her down the road feeds her kids takeaways all the time so my dinosaur shaped chicken nuggets and smiley faces are fine by comparison' '

(how exactly is that relevant?? - OP hasn't once likened the 2 things)

now I could go on and pick holes, quote you in other posts you've made on this thread but some of us have to go and do some study.

once again I should like to think we'll agree to disagree & will talk to you politely on other threads should you so wish.

it's your opinion thou - just like all the rest of us have ours.

Spandex... am with you on this... I'm off too, once the swearing starts it usually goes downhill from there.

I have to say that in my initial op I didn't mention cc at all, just that I wanted to ff to control milk intake more . I only said later that I might go down the cc route if more milk in the daytime doesn't work.

DD2 did used to cry after 40mins in her nap, I left her 10 mins and she settled herself again. Now she doesn't wake during her nap and I wake her after 2hrs, so no crying. The point is that although initially they cry, in the long term as Barnsleybelle said it means much less tired and more contented children. They don't get overtired.

I did try letting dd2 go to sleep where she dropped but unfortunately she was so nosey that she maybe had 30mins all day and by bedtime was so exhausted it was impossible to console her, even with cuddles and she wouldn't feed properly because she fell asleep without taking enough only to wake up 45mins later screaming . It is much better now with structured naps- all be it achieved with a small amount of controlled crying.

Horrid nasty judgey thread Disgusted
My opinion on OP is irrelevan I belive she has been remarkably restrained and dignified in face of one of the nastiest threads I have seen in a long time

mytether-look what you have started!
It's your child-your choice. I don't think you should be condemned here or explain yourself-
I weaned my kids early because I felt that it was right instinctively.
Sleep wise, it is up to you, your child. The rest of it is just our opinions

Of course you can make a baby eat something it doesn't want to, you push a spoon into it's mouth and tip it down it's neck.
They are physically unable to eat until at the very earliest 17 weeks, so what are you doing before then?

My opinion of CC is that it's heartless. I have had to leave the baby to cry sometimes, I'm sure most of us have. Sometimes you;re bursting for a wee, or have to see to one of the other children etc, but that look on their face when you finally manage to get back to them? It's heartbreaking and how anyone can do that just to get some more sleep is beyond me.

Yes, it is in a baby's interest to get it to sleep at night, but waking once or twice a night is normal,it's the parent's best interest that they sleep through, which is totally different.

Anyway I'm leaving this thread now, there is no point me being here, tori and I will never agree and I think we both know this.

Oh they aren't all horrible! Just the 2 or 3 posters who realised my identity and enjoy a good fight with me!

HOW ON EARTH CAN A MOTHER'S 'INSTINCT' TELL THEM THEIR BABY IS PHYSICALLY READY FOR SOLID FOOD WHEN SCIENCE STATES THEY CANNOT BE READY BEFORE 17 WEEKS?!?!?!?!