I know I am but I'm going to do it anyway!

[mytetherisending]

DD2 is now 6mths, has been bf on demand mostly and is fully weaned on 3 meals with desserts, juice from a cup and the occasional snack. She is still demanding night feeds which I feel she shouldn't need if she took good feeds at 10 and 230. Instead she faffs with these and wants milk during the night. I have now decided to quit breast feeding as she will not take bottles- so it is all bottles or none iyswim. I hope that being able to see how much she takes during the day and a gentle prod to take more will reduce night feeding. I have dusted off the GF book which I used with dd1 (and who has only had a handful of disturbed nights since 3mths!) in the hope that the routine will get me some modicum of sleep. I am knackered.

I know it is unreasonable to give up bf for the sake of my sleep, however, dd1 is constantly tired (2.9mths) and is behaving awfully because of it. The baby disturbs her sleep every night

I just needed to vent sorry! Grrr to all those people who say babies get their own pattern and start sleeping eventually- I can't wait til 'eventually' happens!

LOL yes its always the natural parenting brigade who then complain their dcs don't eat well, sleep well, bite,kick and generally behave badly because they have no routine/structure or discipline mostly. They start of getting attention whenever they stamp feet and it continues into school.

LOL... How many times do you see the screaming or tantrumming toddler/child out and about and mum gives that smile and says " he/she's tired". These are the ones that are up 20 times a night cuddling/rocking/making bottles etc etc...

I feel like shouting, " Well bloody teach them to sleep then".

"LOL yes its always the natural parenting brigade who then complain their dcs don't eat well, sleep well, bite,kick and generally behave badly because they have no routine/structure or discipline mostly. They start of getting attention whenever they stamp feet and it continues into school"

Yes - in your strange little fantasy world where something called a 'natural parenting brigade' actually exists.

BB we would get on like a house on fire in RL! I feel exactly the same Natural parenting breeds stroppy, tired kids IME with friends dcs. They don't eat brilliantly so don't sleep brilliantly and so the next day their behaviour is terrible because they are tired.

Mytether... I agree... Do you not find that a lot of the time here on mn that people are basing their parenting on all the conflicting literature that is out there?

I confess to reading masses when i was pregnant with ds and felt swamped with what was right and wrong???? I quickly learnt that the answer to all the masses of " toddler taming" etc etc books was plain and simple.... sleep...

Get the sleep sorted and they are happy, contended children. At the end of the day, it's obvious.... If i don't sleep well i'm grumpy and irritable... imagine a child who has continual disturbed nights, of course they are grumpy..

By the way... i've had far too much wine, can't seem to drag myself to bed...!!!

mytetherisending

What name do you give the sort of parenting that you subscribe to?

And what do you mean by 'natural' parenting?

Fabsmum... don't want to answer the question for mytether... but i see my parenting as "positive parenting". I consider allowing your baby to rely on props to aid sleep, such as music, rocking, cuddles etc etc... as "accidental parenting".

Allowing a child to fall asleep safe and securely is a great gift.. I know young babies don't "sleep through", but at least when they wake, they are not so confused and insecure that they have to cry for that sleep prop to return.

Sometimes i hear dd babbling and laughing at 5am, but she nods back off. I love that she feels so safe that she doesn't have to cry for me to come.

fabsmum- co-sleeping while dc feeds whenever at night in the parents bed. Baby led weaning where more food goes on the floor but milk is not enough to satisfy hunger, causing the child to be constantly at the breast or on lots of bottles of formula, which leads to sleeping worse etc,etc,etc.
ALL UNTIL THE CHILD IS GETTING TOWARDS CHILDHOOD AS OPPOSED TO BEGIONNING OF TODDLERHOOD IYSWIM.

BB thats like dd2 now, she might wake at 530 chatters for a while and then goes back to sleep. No crying for dummy/boob/breakfast straight away because she knows what will happen and when.

DD2 was still awake when I put her to sleep and all I had to say was 'night night sweetheart''see you in the morning' to which she smiled and I walked out,closed the door to and she went calmly to sleep on her own. Both happy.
DD1 was parented this way and asks to go to bed if tired and has never got up in the night from3mths. She is only 2.10 btw.

Mytether... exactly... some mnetters would say they don't cry because "they've given up"!!!

I somtimes wake at 6am but have a wee, toss and turn and nod back off...

Just because a baby wakes early doesn't mean their day should start.

I have ds who is 6 and dd 13 months.

Both parented the same... Ds still can not get past 7.30pm before i get "i'm tired, i'm off to bed".

Dh works overseas so my weekends get a bit lonely. I wanted ds to watch x factor with me... 8pm and he said " can you tape it mum, i'm shattered". Good habits die hard!!!

Bless, bb, how cute!

I totally agree that a solid routine helps to make a baby stay happily in bed. Little Ff (7mo) goes to bed at 7.30 every night, and if she wakes can settle herself, and is more than happy to babble and chatter to herself if she wakes before 7.30 in the morning. I thank my lucky stars for her every day!

Aww bless him! Sure it will all change when they get to teenagers LOL! Where r u anyway?

Need to go to bed now anyway, so I can make the most of my lie in LOL Night ladies!

Mytether.... I live in Barnsley... Please don't wish teenage years on us!!!

freckleface... I'm a routine freak!!! it really does work though. Good sleep makes for happy daytimes..

Jumps onto barnsleybelle's bandwagon

I never thought that I would come anywhere close to a routine, especially during the insane first weeks, but now I can set my clock by the baby, and she is a happy, smiley little thing. Of course, she might just be like that anyway, but I can' help but attribute it slightly to the routine that we forged together.

Another good nights sleep had by all. So 7-7 without the dreamfeed. Yay!!!

Yee Haaaa... Fantastic news.

Just hope it continues LOL

"co-sleeping while dc feeds whenever at night in the parents bed. Baby led weaning where more food goes on the floor but milk is not enough to satisfy hunger, causing the child to be constantly at the breast or on lots of bottles of formula, which leads to sleeping worse etc,etc,etc.
ALL UNTIL THE CHILD IS GETTING TOWARDS CHILDHOOD AS OPPOSED TO BEGIONNING OF TODDLERHOOD IYSWIM"

I think that parents who are quite controlling probably look at families who are more 'go with the flow' and project their own feelings of anxiety about being dominated by their children's needs onto them. Also they probably assume a direct 'cause and effect' relationship when they observe any behaviour in children from these families that they deem to be undesirable. Ie - your children are clingy/fussy/demanding and you practice attachment parenting, therefore attachment parenting has made your child clingy/fussy/demanding.

Have to say - when I'm lying on my death bed I very much doubt I'll be saying 'Oh damn - I wish I'd spent less time breastfeeding/holding my children/singing them off to sleep and snuggling up to them in the night, and more time cleaning the skirting boards, re-organising the cutlery drawer/watching shite on telly with my feet up.

Yes ,but fabsmum at the end of the day, because my dd1 and 2 sleep 7-7 now and have plenty of rest during the day they are happier and not so grumpy. Consequently I can look back on the time I spent with my dcs as really happy times, as opposed to every day being a battle because ther dcs are overtired and emotional. BTW why does routine equate to cleaniong? More time to go out to places without the fear of being embarrassed by their behaviour because they're tired.

So is it just coincidence then that the children who I know who are parented in a routine are far more content, happy than those who don't. I know loads of children and without word of a lie that is what I personally have observed.