..irritated at being addressed by my first name

[raindropsonroses]

At the hospital today the receptionist was "Lucy-ing" me, she wasn't being friendly either, the opposite in fact!
It happens frequently especially in hospitals. It does annoy me, there is a section in my maternity notes where it asks how I would like to be addressed, and I have put Mrs......
I don't mind in certain situations my first name being used, or if a person introduces themselves by their first name, first. Does anybody agree?
AIBU?

It is to me as a divorcee, I want as much distance from him as possible. It means different things to different people and that's how I view it as a name for me.

My HA annoy me because all women are Mrs or Ms! I asked them to correct my name and they can't because Miss isn't an option!

am liking v. much "queen of the universe" in fact will use that this evening when i get home

The whole Ms thing gets my goat too - I can't be Miss Surname as that implies that I'm not married, and Mrs Surname has me married to my Dad as I didn't change my name when I married! So it has to be Ms Surname. I have a PhD, so to be honest I use Dr Surname a lot just to avoid the issue.

People are strange though. I found out recently that a load of my side of the family thought that DH must have been married before, as we had a civil ceremony (and avoided the family church). The thought that as non-churchgoers we would feel completely hypocritical standing up there "in the sight of God" seems to have passed them by... It does explain why quite a few people didn't dress up much (compared to a "normal" family wedding) though. I suppose I should be grateful that they bought gifts, although maybe they thought that DH's first wife kept them all.

(am grateful that they bought gifts anyway, of course)

My doctor phones and says "It's Dave here" and every time I tell him he worked hard for his qualification and should use it.

So under the circs I think it's okay for his receptionist to call me by my first name.

But I like to lead a double life - the children in my music group at ds's school call me Mrs Pence, but ds's class get to call me Twenty when I help with the school play.

IME teachers always check what you want to be.

MrsTittlemouse, nobody is going to force you to use Ms if you prefer to tick Mrs, but it is essential for many of us who don't fall neatly in to either category that there is another category for people in my situation.

In my idea, the ideal would be if every woman was Mrs or Ms and no assumptions could be made (as for men).

When you say "the Ms thing gets your goat" that is upsetting, because it's like saying you don't give a shit that many of us have no title! What would you have us do!??

I see what you mean. Ignore the first and last paragraphs of my post. I would choose to be Dr over Ms too! although Queen of the Universe is in second place.

I don't think first names in schools necessarily invoke disrespect. I've known of a few schools who do this and there doesn't seem to be any issue. I think it's how the teachers act that makes children respect (or not) them - trying to be hip and cool and the pupils' bezzy mates imo is asking for disrespect down the line.

Sorry, didn't make that clear did I? I want to be Ms, it's the way that other people react to it that gets my goat! It seems a bit naff to use my title of Dr outside of work, but it does glide over the whole issue.

Well, MTM, I'll be happy for you to be Ms if you can be happy for me not to be

I do understand why people want to use it and I think it depends on the circumstances, for me to be a MS is a sign of my divorce so I don't like it, I would be Miss if I had never married, I wouldn't have chosen Ms. I can understand why people who don't change their name would use Ms or why a professional would want to use it and accept that some people just do.

Our local Tesco has stopped supplying carrier bags at the checkouts and you now have to ask for them. The problem is I can't help but ask for the bags in a really grumpy and pissed off way. Why should I have to ask for bags like I've committed a heinous crime by failing to bring my own. I understand the idea behind it and I do my bit by recycling all my carrier bags. Why don't Tesco do their bit by reducing plastic packaging instead? I know that truthfully I abu but for some reason it really really annoys me.