Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

rude worker in whsmith upset my 8yr old d

288 replies

pastapestofor6 · 10/07/2008 22:17

my dd 8 has been saving up to buy some hsm magazine, she has got the required 3.50 so today was the happy day for the long anticipated purchase to take place,
she went into smiths, I sat on bench directly i mean DIRECTLY outside with 2 younger ds's, she entered shop and the shop assistant[who i might add i dont know] said 'where is your mum?'
dd says 'just outside on the bench', woman then says 'what you doing in here' dd replies'just looking around', woman says 'do you have any money?' dd replies 'yes £3.50' to which woman replies'well you wont get anything in here for that' at which point dd fled the shop white as a sheet and shaking
I made to go in the shop and give her what for, but dd begged me to leave it, considering her upset i did so, very reluctantly i might add!
but aibu for letting her go into shop on her own [she is nearly 9]
and if not , then what should i do?

OP posts:
Flashman · 11/07/2008 22:29

ChukkyPig - I would point out that in life there are some things which are a serious vexation to the soul and if they can be avoid, avoid them, that you as consumer is king - and if you are not happy with a service to take your business somewhere else.

RegenerAitch · 11/07/2008 22:33

and what's wrong with that, flashman, is that it appears to be company policy (at least at the store level) to treat kids like wrongdoers, so it needs to go higher. if it's store-wide, take your business elsewhere. if not, then the OP can prevent other children being treated like this.

come on, it's a shit way to treat a person, you must see that.

Original poster
pastapestofor6 · 11/07/2008 22:33

you are clearly macho enough to sacre them into giving you no shite
you are a big man, my dd is 4 ft 3 and weighs 4 stone
you are an idiot in my honest opinion, and its not because you have disagreed with me, it because you are comparing yourself and your reactions to those of a little girl

OP posts:
ChukkyPig · 11/07/2008 22:37

Well yes flashman...

But I do the high street round every day with the baby. Mothercare shut down when she was 2mo. So that leaves me with WHS, boots, robert dyas and waitrose. And WHS have two shops where I live, one book and mags, one art stuff etc.

Anyone guess where I live yet?

The thing is, I want them to behave better, as a presence on most high streets, what they sell has an impact. I want them to be responsible.

psmith · 11/07/2008 22:38

I would have complained too? If it had happened to me then I would have dealt with the individual but if it had happened to a child then I would have done the same as you. I want my dcs to know that if anyone discriminates against them then I am going to fight their corner for them until they are capable enough to do it themselves.

WendyWeber · 11/07/2008 22:38

Flashman, you have not yet experienced parenthood, correct? So you have no idea of how an attack on your child feels? So you can't legitimately comment on this threwad. So shut up.

pleasant

WendyWeber · 11/07/2008 22:39

threwad = thread, obv

Flashman · 11/07/2008 22:41

I am not compairing myself to a 8 yo. My answers were all to questions how would you like it if this happened - that would seem to imply that they were expecting a response how would I like it now - it was only once I could clearly say yeah happened so what, that it was mentioned no not the same as an eight yo. i agree but that was not what was asked. Read the thread again I am not compairing myself to an 8 yo. and the "clearly macho enough to sacre them into giving you no shite" was a reference to Magnificent not the thread in general.

You think I am an idiot fine - I think you are a little thick. Not because you disagree with me, but rather you are projecting what you think I said to what I actually said.

Flashman · 11/07/2008 22:45

Well in fact perhaps it is easier for me to comment on this thread as I don't have a child yet to get all bent out of shape over an injustice or not.

RegenerAitch · 11/07/2008 22:45

By Flashman on Fri 11-Jul-08 21:45:30
RegenerAitch Oh I don't perhaps, perhaps not - but I just don't seem to remember my mother ever really coming in and fighting my battles when i was younger when someone said things to me. It was a more get back in there. Perhaps why now I don't really have any self esteem or confidence issues. In fact prob a little bit to have the other way with a dilussions of grandure!

apart from the spelling issues, which i will forbear to go into... you do seem to be comparing yourself (remembering however accurately what it was like to be a child) to the OP's child. not only that, you seem to imply that the OP's approach will give her dd self-esteem and confidence issues. i can see why she's pissed off about that, particularly given that you don't yet know how you'll feel as a parent.

TheMagnificent7 · 11/07/2008 22:46

Flashman, i see what you're saying.

But when I read it out loud it sounds like " la la lalala la laaa la laa alaaa la laa la"

Enjoy your wankacino and your copy of How To Win Friends And Influence People.

Come back to us when it happens to your child for the first time and let us know if you still feel the same. I bet you £3.50 you don't.

You've got to get your head in the game

Original poster
pastapestofor6 · 11/07/2008 22:49

how would you like it if this happened to your child is the OBVIOUS QUESTION in my op flashman, as you dont have a child, you are talking from your own experiences, which are obviously not relevant in talking about how someone was rude to my 8 yr old dd
as for thinking im thick , thats fine
thick as mud and probably common as muck too!!

OP posts:
Flashman · 11/07/2008 22:55

RegenerAitch well to be fair that would be compairing like with like as I was thinking as a child - however -

StealthPolarBear on Fri 11-Jul-08 14:43:40
Flashman, so would you mind being quizzed as to the contents of your purse as you enter a shop? And then being told to p*ss off (I can't see any other way to interpret "well you wont get anything in here for that")

StealthPolarBear on Fri 11-Jul-08 15:51:36
so would it have been OK if they had been like this to an adult? Because 30 something women have been noticed coming into the branch and not purchasing anything?

So from that I thought the question was how I would feel about it at my current age - perhaps I am mistaken and in fact it was addressed for me to consider in view of being 8??

Oh and sorry about the spelling!

Flashman · 11/07/2008 22:59

err no its not - your question was what should i do. And having a child or not having a child is not relevent to that satement.

RegenerAitch · 11/07/2008 23:02

thing is, flashman, as people who've been 'not parents' and 'parents', we're probably better qualified to comment on whether you're qualified...

Original poster
pastapestofor6 · 11/07/2008 23:12

well maybe it could be construed as 'as the PARENT of an 8 yr old what would u do?'

I am fed up arguing with you now flashman
why are you even on mumsnat on a friday night anyway???

OP posts:
Original poster
pastapestofor6 · 11/07/2008 23:14

obviously meant mumsnet, too bust drooling at/watching gordon ramsey on c4

OP posts:
ChukkyPig · 11/07/2008 23:16

Flashman I think the difference is that how you felt when stuff like this happened to you when you were a child, and how you will feel when stuff like this happens to your child are very different.

The OP's daughter I'm sure will forget the whole thing very quickly. The OP won't. So your view of how things were when you were a child are not relevant, as much as how did your mum and dad feel.

I remember one time I tearfully went to my dad at a school fete because a man had accidentally elbowed me in the face. And not apologised. My dad was livid. He calmed down before a fight, but, flashman, it is a very primeval thing. No-one hurts your children in any way. If they do they deserve to die.

Looking forward to your posts when your PFB first gets knocked over by a bigger kid.

lilacclaire · 11/07/2008 23:25

Without being drawn into the 'brawl' lol.

I think thats a horrible insensitive thing to happen to your dd pasta.

Something like that can really knock a childs confidence and I can totally see where your coming from.

I would be furious as well and I don't think the response to your complaint was satisfactory.

Flashman · 11/07/2008 23:26

pastapestofor6 - I am on here on a Friday because at the moment my life is on pause unti DW "pops".

And if you wanted it to be constructed that way perhaps that is what you should have wrote!

And after 219 post - I can see your point - go get them Tiger. And have you considered writting to the PM office and see if they can put some pressure on WHS for you. Watchdog??

Tortington · 11/07/2008 23:29

of all the threads i read this afternoon i didn't expect this to appear when i logged on.

how the geoff did this kick off?

Original poster
pastapestofor6 · 11/07/2008 23:31

grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
I won't swear at u flashman
I won't I won't I won't
now sod off theres a dear boy
and its written not wrote

OP posts:
ChukkyPig · 11/07/2008 23:32

Flash, looking forward to the announcement. And then you will switch from being the kid, to being the parent. Best thing ever. But I know for a fact things I did as a kid, I would never let my kids do. And I now understand why my parents were so worked up all the time.

Tortington · 11/07/2008 23:33

i'll swear at flashman - is flash actualy a man? think ig athered with no children?

that says itall really. fuck off theres a dear

Flashman · 11/07/2008 23:34

I can't sod off if someone puts a question or a comment to me.

See thats why I won't be writting any letters to anyone - can't spell for shite.

Hell why would you be swearing - its not like it personel.