To be a bit miffed at my friend’s idea of a ‘takeaway night’ tomorrow

[Teriyt]

My friend is kindly hosting a night for me and two others, a girly catch up.

When suggested we agreed on getting a takeaway and consensus from earlier this week was to get an Indian, and we earmarked the specific takeaway we’d order from.

My friend hosting has messaged to say she has picked up a ‘deal‘ from the supermarket this afternoon so she has got some ready meal curries and sides and said we can sort the money out on the night.

First world problem I know, but a supermarket ready meal doesn’t really hit the spot compared to a proper Indian takeaway so I feel a bit annoyed! She didn’t check with us before.

You are a dick if everyone has already agreed what they are going to eat and you over-ride that to get them something else , and then tell them they have to pay for it. That's just rude.

You're not a dick, it's a simple misunderstanding as to how much they'd care about it. As I said: massively blown out of proportion.

Yes, you absolutely are when there has been organisation and agreement to the contrary, and you unilaterally override this without any discussion to change agreed arrangements.

They would not be a dick at all if no food arrangements had been agreed on and that’s what they got. That didn’t happen though.

I'm telling you because I care (and I know you will too) - override is one word and does not require a hyphen.

Of course. Much more depth of flavour rather than a few spices in pan then bung the base sauce on top

What was it the op said? Along the lines of 'We have all been howling about this in a separate group'

Not pleasant behaviour at all. But you do you.

She can get a biryani and veg curry for a tenner

'Organisation', 'agreement to the contrary', 'unilaterally override', 'agreed arrangements' – more hugely out of proportion language for one simple meal round someone's house at a casual get together. What a fuss over nothing.

No, we aren't that poster who was temporarily living with her sister.

The entire history of comedy is based on laughing when people have been a bit of nob. Most adults are mature enough to take this in good grace. No-one respects characters who get their arse on about this. That puts one in the same category as people like Trump.

But as you say, you do you.

Well your posts are certainly contributing greatly to said fuss about nothing.

So you obviously find the 'nothing' conversation worthy too.

Why thank you good Madam, for that useful correction. 🙂

You mean by three replies to people who reply to me? If you say so ...

I wouldn't judge them for saying it to her face at all.

"Oh come on Jean, we all agreed to chip in for a takeaway treat. Its fine if you don't want to join in but we're all looking forward to it. Also on what planet is Asda anywhere near as good as x takeaway?" . Fine, IMO

Whereas something along the lines of "OMG! Did you see Jean expected us to eat a ready meal? I can't actually believe it. I wouldn't even give it to the dog in case the RSPCA had me up for animal cruelty. Lol". Is not how I'd talk about a friend behind their back.

Any time!

If she’s an otherwise good friend, it wouldn’t particularly bother me but I’m pretty easy going with food- I’ll eat most things! 🤣

When it is done to their face. Absolutely. Which the op and friends did not

I'd say

Dear friend,

Thanks for thinking of us while you were shopping but when we decided to get a take away the other day I honestly thought we meant restaurant quality food from a takeaway to be delivered on the night and have been day dreaming about it, so now I really fancy that and looking forward to a treat. Happy to buy my own if that's not what you had in mind. Sorry if there was some confusion as to what getting a take away means. Love you loads

Absolute twaddle.

Regardless of money/quality of food etc, I think it's weird to all agree on a specific takeaway and then one person moves the goalposts.

Yes, you are engaging in the literal definition of a conversation.

And I I do say so, yes 🙂

They are ok a quick tea but not for a get together i would prefer a proper takeaway

Oh come on, now you are just trolling! Like all those comedians, all through history only make jokes when the subject is in the audience.

OP and her friends have handled this well. They've laughed at the situation and come up with a constructive and respectful way forward with the friend.

If you want to label them bullies and backstabbers for this, then I will leave you to you singular definitions.

Yes. In front of them in the audience and most of the time they then have a laugh at themselves too. This was done behind the friends back. Jeez this is hard work. Are you deliberately being obtuse?

A conversation of three replies isn't 'causing a fuss'. Seems like you're just out of ammunition and flinging out any old argument.