To think Meghan Markle isn’t the problem, it’s Harry?

[WryJadeWren]

I don’t understand why Meghan is so often treated as the driving force behind everything people dislike about them, while Harry is portrayed as some helpless man who’s been led astray.

He’s a grown man with his own opinions and the ability to make his own decisions. It’s his family and presumably he has far more history with them than she does. Why is the assumption that she’s manipulated him, rather than that he has his own grievances and is doing what he wants?

You don’t have to like Meghan to recognise that Harry is responsible for his own behaviour. I actually find him more irritating, particularly the impression he gives that everyone else is responsible for his unhappiness.

AIBU to think she gets a disproportionate amount of the blame, while he gets far too much benefit of the doubt?

She isn't liked because she is poisonous, not because she is black.

Yes probably. If she wanted fame and riches she could have just stuck it out in the RF and had all the money and fame she wanted in return for not doing very much, or been the 4th wife of some American actor. I suspect they both regret the whole thing. I can't see her being happy in the UK and I can't see him wanting to go back to the US but they have children who should not have to be ferried across the Atlantic just because people who are not affected by them in any way want poor little innocent Harry back without his wife.

Theunamedcat
I thought that as I typed my post. Was she the only member of Meghans family at her wedding?

Yes.

I don’t think either of them are. Sure Harry gaffed on things, as do we all. The whole sorry shit show, as far as I can see was caused by the royal’ press secretaries all briefing against each other. PR people, a job the planet doesn’t need, as proved by that tedious PR Disasters thread on here.

It’s a useful way to spot the deranged, mention their names and the howlers run for the moon. Obsessed morons.

She was offered help and support she didn't want it she was unprepared partly because of her own actions mosty because of harry i think had he dated her for another year she would have run like the rest of them

The “how I curtseyed to the late Queen’ got me. Harry didn’t know where to look.

No but would you slag off your family in your book? Just to sell copies.

Do you feel the same about King Charles and the book he wrote which included less than flattering information about his mother and father?

I dislike them both in equal measure. I don’t think she’s lead him astray. I think his bitterness and unhappiness has always been there, but maybe when they got together she stroked his ego and he was no longer alone with his thoughts which brought everything out in the open. Both showed who they really are once they did the Oprah interview. After that there was no going back for either of them. Especially when their reasoning for leaving the UK was to seek a quieter more private life, yet that turned out to be a blatant lie. You don’t leave for privacy and then subsequently set up a huge tell all interview about your family within days of leaving.

Exactly this. So many drama lovers on this thread, all dying to blame the woman. I find it pathetic how many people think they know what’s gone on when we know nothing.

I think the problem is the entire royal family and the whole concept of monarchy.

If they'd just left Harry to have a long military career they wouldn't have half these problems. He had a messed up childhood started to find his way and then that got messed up too. I think he's allowed to have a few familiy issues. The only reason his family issues are so public is because his family is so public, it is simply a reflection of his life.

I don't know anyone who asked their grandmother for permission to name their child.

As for Megan she has married into a complex family, to a guy with complex trauma and she's still there, which is quite something, most people would be divorced in that scenerio and that's without the added pressure of media and public scrutiny.

Hugging is quite jarring for us though. I mean, how many times a day do you hear people complain about people leaning in for the hug...
😁

Exactly this!!!

It’s literally because she’s a woman and anytime a man does wrong (doesn’t see his family or kids etc) it’s apparently because a woman is stopping him or the ex is crazy etc etc.

Harry has been very vocal about how everything was his choice and why but it’s still somehow her fault.

Well this is an absolute record. It took until page 2 for a self-appointed, prefect type told OP off for not posting on one of the Royal boards. Most people just treat it all a bit like cleb gossip like we used to have in the olden days. Some us of admit it is not big or clever and just use it as a mild distraction, most people mainly do not care either way. As a (very privileged) couple, they really do not help themselves. If they do have a PR team, they either ignore them or they are mind-blowingly crap at what they do.

Yes.

And Markle seems to have quite a few sins besides being a woman -

1. she is American - therefore annoying and fake
2. she is an actress - which proves she is annoying and fake
3. she is divorced - which also proves that she is annoying and fake 'cause she dumped the first husband
4. she is black.

There’s a grandly named psychological
condition called folie a deux ie they egg each other’s worst bits on.

They fit each other’s flaws nicely. And they’re convinced nobody understands them except them. This ends up being very sane, as no one can stand them & they get isolated.

The Duke of Windsor and Mrs Simpson were the same - she didn’t want to marry him but kept being lured back by the bling, and he was dazzled by a big EXIT sign flashing above her head, escape from the unappreciative royals.

@Supersimkin7 I think you might be right. It's a real shame, because some partners do the opposite and bring out the best in each other. No idea what that's called :-).

She isn't liked by me...

There, I fixed it for you.

Boring and untrue. Kate’s popular. Diane was popular. Anne is popular. Camilla admittedly not so much, but not because she’s a woman, more that people have found it hard to forgive her for being partly the cause of the Charles and Di spilt. And it’s just so so tedious that some people think you can get a free pass to be obnoxious just because of the colour of your skin. People don’t like her because she’s been shown to be unpleasant, time after time. I actually liked her initially as she was a breath of fresh air, as did a lot of people. Then I didn’t like her because she started showing us who she really was. Simple as that really…

The use of Lillibet as the actual name was so disrespectful. They could have called the child Elizabeth and used Lillibet as a family pet name. I would love to have seen the late Q rolling her eyes!

“how I curtseyed to the late Queen’

Are you talking about the bow in the Oprah interview?

She is referencing Medieval Times Dinner and Tournament, which is a live action theatre chain in America. She was doing a parody of that. She says it very clearly.

But by the same token, you can't be surprised when your family react badly to the slagging off you've committed to print and the co-opting of a pet childhood name that was only ever used by close family.

I think that H and M are equally odious - a rather dim and petulant manchild with a prince-sized chip on his shoulder and a vain and shallow z-list actress on the make whose overwhelming ambition far outstrips her competence in any area. The best thing they can do now is to buggar off back to Montecito PDQ.

And didn’t Charles also sell jam too?

I always find it interesting how certain royals can do xyz and it’s absolutely fine but if another royal does it, they’re trash/cringe, attention-seeking and need to lose their position this instance 🙄. The hypocrisy and bias is ridiculous but whatever sells paper. I wonder how much the British tabloids make for stirring up unnecessary and often baseless drama and why people choose to actually believe it when the evidence is six degrees and further of separation. I wouldn’t be surprised if some of it was a bit like the game ‘telephone’ (think that is what it’s called) where you whisper a message in someone’s ear and by time you get to the fourth/fifth person the message is something else completely and what actually happened is much more boring than people expect.