to not want ds, 9, to attend the sex education lessons at school?

[fircone]

It's just that he is only a little boy. He is the youngest in the year and is completely un-streetwise. His friends' mothers are unhappy about these lessons too.

I'm not Victoria Gillick (remember her, anyone?) and I would be happy for information to be provided at the end of Year 6 before they move up to secondary school, but I strongly feel that at nine years old this is going to be all too much.

I know that there is the brigade who insist that children must be aware of everything from the earliest age, but I am happy for children to stay children for as long as possible.

I agree with the Codster. It's only human biology. When were you planning to tell your DD how to play hide the sausage, Lisalisa, on her wedding night?

yy

ok FOUR of us are right and the OP iswrong

cna we DO htis on mn
kidn of all gang up?!

I don't understand the line that sex education means children have 'lost their innocence' or are somehow not children any more ([I want] 'children to stay children'. Doesn't make any sense at all to me, would love someone who thinks along those lines to explain it.

OP, you've had some good advice about chatting with the teachers to put your mind at rest. Far better for ds to have the truth than be misled by playground gossip, surely?

Lisa, I don't get why you were angry - do you expect every other parent to hush it up in order to stop the truth getting back to your daughter?

I may get flamed for this BUT - You may all have seen the documentary where Davina Mcall went to Holland to see how they handled sex education? I thought it was fab and their statistics spoke for themselves, the lowest teenage pregnancy rate in Europe and guess who's near the top - yes the UK!

The more taboo you make it, the more it's seen as something naughty and dirty and thus something they HAVE to do to be rebellious. If sex is just part of everyday conversation, something that kids know grown ups do and that it's something we do to express love for our partners, then it stops being something that happens behind bike sheds just so they can pop their cherry and have VIRGIN taken off their status label.

I am very pro younger sex ed, as I want my boys to be respectful young men, taking care of future girlfriends and respecting wishes as far as having sex for the first time goes.

If left to my husband however it will be 'get in son, give her one!' (joke)

No that would be wrong and unheard of.

Pah, it looks like most people think IABU.

I just hope these lessons are reasonable.

Unlike some people, I do not regret not providing him with a copy of The Joy of Sex when he was 18 months old.

Children can still be children, even if they do know the facts of life. They can also still be children if they know about masturbation ... he'd be an unusual 9 year old who hasn't worked out what his willy can do in that respect.

Having a daughter who has been asking questions about babies, periods and sex since before she was three (she thinks it's "gross"!) I am amazed you've managed to get this far without telling him at least something.

Would you really rather he heard distorted "facts" in the playground than heard it from you or a teacher?

yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

op gievs in!!!
cna we try htis on xenia?

set em up and we'll knock em down

Xenia doesn't start threads in AIBU . She's always reasonable, donchaknow?

It doesn't work on Xenia, Cod. She is made of stronger stuff than us mere mortals.

Firecone - what are you expecting? Graphic videos? What would be your idea of Graphic?

I think it's really important for boys to learn about sex and understand that it's more than just 'any hole's a goal'.

Almost graciously bowing to the inevitable there, fircone!

I used Mummy's Laid an Egg, btw - The Joy of Sex is gruesome and not terribly appropriate for a 3yo. The pictures of hairy naked 1970s man who you could tell would be wearing a kipper tie and flares if he had the chance nearly put me off for life...

Yep, I noticed that people had been complaining that OPs never really think they are unreasonable, just seeking to ratify their view.

So I thought I will be the new role model of reasonableness.

(Still miserable about ds having the stupid old sex lessons, though.)

I don't think you should tell your children the facts of life because of anything someone else might do. Why be influenced by others? If you don't want him to have sex ed at school, then don't. You don't have to justify it. Your child, your decision.

oh and the Dutch approach only works because the WHOLE COUNTRY is united in their strategies for sex ed and it has been fed down the generations - it would be a big thing to get the UK to catch up as the taboo aspect is ingrained within generations of our schooling....brought up to believe it's not something to be talked about in public etc.

PMSL @ hairy 1970's man

I bought a book a couple of years ago called "Where Willy went" (Willy is a sperm). Informative and also funny and I would say aimed at about the year 4 age group.

Crazy for what? Not substituting The Joy of Sex for Biff and Chip?

Fircone, you are indeed establishing a new model of reasonableness IF you avoid the temptation to respond to people who are being a tad unhelpful.