AIBU to be hurt about the school PTA taking the piss out of me?

[CalamityHen]

I joined the PTA at my DC's school at the start of term and have been trying to get stuck in and help out where I can.

I've just found out from another PTA member that some of the others have apparently been making fun of me behind my back for being too keen and a try hard. She showed me a message from a group chat where they've nicknamed me Penelope Pitstop because apparently I never have a hair out of place (this is actually quite funny in itself because it categorically isn't true. The only reason they probably think this is that the days I do school drop-off are also the days I go into the office, so they see me looking reasonably presentable. They don't see my usual scruffy self the rest of the time. And, for the record, some of them are considerably more glam and polished than I am).

But that's beside the point really. I'm genuinely quite hurt by it and now I don't know what to do. Part of me thinks I should ignore it, carry on as normal and hope they eventually get over whatever their issue is. Part of me thinks I should quietly step back and leave them to it. And part of me thinks I should say something, although I absolutely hate confrontation and would rather avoid an awkward atmosphere at school if possible.

I also don't know whether knowing about it will make every PTA meeting feel horribly awkward now, even if I pretend I haven't seen the messages.

So, WWYD? Would you carry on regardless, quietly quit, or address it with them?

Id have said Penelope Pitstop has left the building and then flounced.

Blimey so much drama on school whatsapp groups.

The trending converstion on the class Whatsapp right now is Vulva Incense burners.

It's a great school!!

Don’t resign- the money doesn’t go to them- it’s for the school.

I would change your profile pic on the WhatsApp though- just to make them aware you know

Don't leave.
You're giving up your time for the good of the school - ie the kids, not the PTA women.

I would change my profile to an obvious Penelope Pitstop pic and carry on.

Id be wary of the person who shows you the messages OP. Unless she was also showing you how she shut it down .... but she didnt did she.

Don't let them win 💐 Be the better person and carry on the good work. After a couple of months they'll get bored. Juvenile twats they are.

Say i'll take it and you are Dick Dastardly and Mutley.

This is really good advice. I would also recommend you take it as a compliment and carry on being yourself. They sound jealous and she shouldn’t have shown you the message.

Given that you're just at the start of a long stint with kids in primary school and you've got little ones and a job, a quiet stepping back would be fair enough.

Don't resign, just stop volunteering to do things - too much on at the moment, next time hopefully! You can push that can down a road as long as you like.

It's unpleasant to create an in-joke about a new person. You can bide your time until those involved are a bit friendlier to new volunteers.

In the meantime, yes do change your profile pic! It's actually a great nickname if you're up for it!

I've just found out from another PTA member that some of the others have apparently been making fun of me behind my back for being too keen and a try hard.

Why on earth would someone do that? To be honest I'd be more angry with her then with the chattering PTA members.
They're is absolutely nothing to be gained other than making someone feel embarrassed and awkward. This woman is awful.

Whatever you decide to do, @CalamityHen , make sure that you let the others know who told you.

What a load of spiteful witches. Try to rise above it and ignore them.

This is precisely why I refuse to help the PTA, they’re beyond bitchy but under the guise of being do-gooders.

I think we can tell whose little darlings are going to turn into bullys!
I would confront but i dont think that's the best idea!
My little one has just started reception and i ummed and ahhhed about joining PTA but things like this put me off!

Don’t resign - definitley change your photo to Penelope though and then just take a small step back from volunteering - unless it’s something fun or specifically involves your DD.

It’s a sub group of the PTA right? Not everyone so they might be leaving soon as their kids age out - don’t let them chase you away.

I wouldn't worry. They are clearly threatened by you. Personally I would leave, they aren't worth your time or energy. Bitchy, jealous bullies are the worst.

penelope pitstop is a baddie. I’d be delighted if someone likened me to her. Slay girl.

@CalamityHen She showed me a message from a group chat where they've nicknamed me Penelope Pitstop because apparently I never have a hair out of place

If this is intended to be an insult, then it's a strange choice to use the name of a famous and well-liked animated character who is depicted as a young and slim woman. Generally when people go for insults, they normally pick things like "Shrek."

Is it definitely an insult? Because without any further context it sounds like it might be meant as a compliment.

And this type of shit behaviour is what gives PTA mums such a bad name.

I wouldn't give up my time for these mean girls.

X

Quietly step back.

Take it as a (albeit behind your back) compliment on your enthusiasm and perceivable togetherness.

Change your profile pic, then rise above it and carry on as before, you're doing good things for the school

Absolutely change your profile picture to Penelope 🤣. Let them squirm with them feeling awkward, not you!!

Don’t leave, kill them with kindness.

I would lean into it even harder. Write a message saying ‘Penelope Pitstop here. Just wondering what the next activities are for the KIDS (after I ensure all my hair is in place of course). ‘

I'd change your profile pic and if anyone comments, just laugh and say that there's a mole in someone's WhatsApp group.

If you want to be on the PTA, carry on, don't resign.
Definitely change your WhatsApp profile!!
I met loads of lovely people on the PTA, some were a bit of a nightmare but the good outweighed the bad.

Please change your photo in WhatsApp to Penelope Pit stop….that will get them talking….haha