AIBU for refusing primary school homework apart from reading?

[AntiPrimaryHomework]

My dc are 7,9 and 13. We’ve never done any homework at primary school. I strongly disagree with it all except reading.

The school aren’t happy but my dc all have ASD and ADHD diagnosed and they are too exhausted every weekday and at weekends we let them play and relax and take them out.

At secondary school we believe homework is necessary and ds1 happily does his but for primary we just don’t agree at all.

Does anyone else feel the same ?

I will encourage homework... when its necessary. it isn't at 6.

They’ll be different to their classmates and will be excluded from related discussions.

If they're having discussions related to homework in primary school that could result in children being excluded, they're either not assigning homework right or they're not doing class discussions right.

If you can't figure out how to sit down and do your work at some point between primary level and university/post-grad, you're probably not much of candidate for further education.

My homework free children figured it out just fine.

I have no idea how that relates to my post.

I’m the complete opposite to you, I think the younger they learn they have to do a bit of homework the better, it helps cement in what they’ve been learning at school and really they won’t be doing that much at primary school.

You said
Doing the homework means they get used to working at home. Which they have to do to get a degree and a masters.

I said
If you can't figure out how to sit down and do your work at some point between primary level and university/post-grad, you're probably not much of candidate for further education.
My homework free children figured it out just fine.

The point being, that I think implying you can draw a straight line of causation between primary school homework and the ability to work at home at degree and post-degree level is quite a reach. I'm sorry you seem to be having difficulty following the conversation.

I was with you until your last sentence. Manners is another thing people don’t teach their children.

There is a big difference between not doing homework because you can’t be arsed and not doing homework because you prioritise reading real interesting books. Homework can be a sop 10 minutes of spelling then here’s a phone.
Many posters on here have done their research and refuse to do homework because they understand real education is more than worksheets.

All the posters patting themselves on the back for being shit parents.

You can do both you know.

You can but the books were boring the worksheets were uninspiring. I wanted my dc to have joy in education and learning to be engaged and interested and questioning. We discussed the value of the homework, if they liked it we did it. I taught them to reason and make judgements to comply when it mattered. I taught them to love reading and they are both still active readers, despite primary school best efforts to teach the function and kill the love of reading.
Just for reference they both then went on to secondary did all their homework , went to uni and now have good jobs.

We did the homework and it didn't kill their love of reading. Hence the Masters in Creative Writing.

Well done. Lots of other parents have very different experiences. My dc loathed the school books with a burning passion and found the worksheets tedious. I focused on getting them moving, burning off energy and then reading something they actively looked forward to.
Others may want their children to do pointless activities to conform but I took a different view. You do you.

I had a similar meeting when my 9 year old started trying to cut his own fingers off with a kitchen knife because of homework.
We sadly, do not have a choice of schools, as despite an abundance, they are all over-subscribed.
Since then, that 9 year old is now 12, settled in a lovely secondary academy where he is supported every day and treated like a person and not like a maggot (the way the primary school treated him). He does his homework now with very little complaint, the only real issue we have is with reading.
Since I formally “resigned my homework duties” in that meeting, I refuse to do homework for my youngest too. If he ever gets in trouble l inform the teacher that all of her pedagogy is incorrect and outdated, and email several links to reputable studies that demonstrate how rubbish primary school homework actually is. I say this as an ex-SENDCO of 10 years.

That's nice.
Now what?

You can, but why bother?

😂😂😂

If your measure of being a shit parent is not making an exhausted 5 year old learn 10 spellings because they already worked for 6+ hours that day... Then you don't live in the real world.

If you mean not forcing my autistic child to do homework when he’s actively in a meltdown and trying to chop his own fingers off because of homework is shit parenting, then yes, I’m the worlds shittiest parent.
Rather be a shit parent then have my kid be sectioned over homework.

My younger two at primary only need to do reading each week. However at this same school years ago their two older siblings had to do written stuff and reading each week.

An exhausted 5 year old 😂 Exhausted from the rigours of a school day in Primary school?

Get a grip 😂😂😂

And yes it's lazy parenting. Do better.

Fuck off.

She fell asleep in the dinner once at 4:45. We had to bring dinner to 4pm, because she was in bed asleep by 6pm in Reception sleeping soundly until 7/7:30am.

So yes she was fucking tired.

I don't need to do better.
She's 6, August born, in year 2, and reads at year 5/6 level. She's currently reading The Wizards of Once after having finished off the How to train your dragon series for example.

She exceeds in all areas, she's doing just fine thanks.

Do they have learning difficulties alongside ASD/ ADHD?

Do have a 5 year old? Some of them are extremely tired after a day at school. Homework with an exhausted 5 year old child is a total waste of time. They will learn nothing. Except to hate doing homework. At 5 all they need is regular reading and 5 minutes practicing their spellings maybe.
And not all kids are the same. Just because yours weren’t exhausted after school doesn’t mean no ones are.
Be nicer.

In Wales homework is not compulsary in primary school. It makes no difference to attainment.