AIBU for refusing primary school homework apart from reading?

[AntiPrimaryHomework]

My dc are 7,9 and 13. We’ve never done any homework at primary school. I strongly disagree with it all except reading.

The school aren’t happy but my dc all have ASD and ADHD diagnosed and they are too exhausted every weekday and at weekends we let them play and relax and take them out.

At secondary school we believe homework is necessary and ds1 happily does his but for primary we just don’t agree at all.

Does anyone else feel the same ?

Haha how did they make you?? Did they threaten to expel your children? Are you worried your kids will get behind if they're not getting as much practice as the others? Just curious, no judgement.

Lazy parenting to have read the research? To understand how homework fits in to learning? Lazy parenting to push a wide range of rich texts not the pap that schools send home.
A lazy parent simply does what they are told. An engaged parent takes time to research think and then complement the curriculum with a range of exciting activities. Doing a Twinkle worksheet does not make you a good parent. Do better.

Why be performative?

Perfectly put @Greenleavesandsunshine. I sometimes think that wanting to stick your child in front of some rote task after school is an indicator of a parent who doesn't want to actually have to think about parenting.

I also think that a person who doesn't understand or acknowledge that making it through a six hour school day of navigating social interactions, following schedules, rules, and learning academics is indeed a long day for a 5 year old is the one who needs to get a grip.

Reading is reading so I think reading anything ought to count as homework if its just reading those boring early readers (had to do those with both DC when teaching them to read in English and fully understand not wanting to read them when capable of reading something better), though DS's reading homework is often things like read the next page of the science textbooks so that obviously can't be replaced by any book.

But uninspiring worksheets? Not everything has to be inspiring. So long as they were related to what they had been learning in class then they would be useful. Homework here is always continuation of the lesson to reinforce learning - returning to something after a break of a few hours really does help it stick in your head better, or going through their books to do any missed tasks from the unit for revision for tests (helping build essential study skills)

What do you mean?

That says it all.

What?

Why jump through the hoops of school homework just to look the part? Especially if you prioritize doing things at home that are actually educationally beneficial at home, like reading together, engaging in discussions, etc.

It's hardly jumping through hoops. Not doing it is lazy parenting.

I'm a secondary school teacher. We read with DS every night and do the spellings but most of the time we ignore the other homework. This month he did do the creative project because he wanted to (and my husband had time to do it with him, which is obviously required). He does sport, we go to the park, and some days they just play, have a snack etc.

The school sounds mad - you're absolutely right about prioritising their attendance and not letting them burn out. I also don't agree that they need to have done homework in primary school to cope in secondary. I work in a private school where half our intake comes from the junior school (where they get a lot of homework) and half come from all over the place and lots of them have barely done homework. Years 7-9 are partly about them adjusting to the idea that they have to work outside the school day. It sounds like your older one is fine. Tbh I try to get the most I possibly can out of them in Years 7-11 without loads of homework because they already spend enough time in school each day and lots of them do loads of activities outside school and are doing homework at 9pm when they are 12 years old. What a mad world we live in.

Stop being so ridiculously narrow minded and rude.

Please enlighten me why she absolutely must do this work at home....

I'll wait...

So they got a masters in creative writing.
..

So what?

Back at you.

Wait away.

Refraining from doing something that has no benefit isn't lazy, it's thoughtful.

I'm sure the school feels the same...

I serve dinner 4.30pm for this very reason. My 9yo is often awake before 6am. Still exhausted after school. Supper around 6pm if they are still hungry. Often asleep before 7.30pm. No joke.

You're not alone.

School doesn't care as DD will be bringing home the SATS for them with probably 120 all round h ha ha
Never done homework, they've never said anything z she's exceeding beyond ARE.

So nahhh, you crack on and make your kids do the work if you really feel strongly about it.

I'll let my daughter read, experiment, play, learn her violin, cook, write stories, dance etc not sit and write out a page of sins like 12+8, when she can already add 189+226 😁

Reading is perfectly fine.
We dont do homework..let them be kids.
Mind you in your country they fine you for none attendance...go figure.

Oh, so you have nothing.... No justification for calling people lazy parents for not doing the homework.... Yet you can provide no actual reason why we should?

My "kids" are both adults. My initial post to you was being supportive, but if this is the way you go on at the school staff, they probably can't be arsed with you.

Much like me now.

I'm open minded enough to know that some people might think it's necessary to do homework and that's up to them, but also open minded enough to understand that not every child is the same or needs to participate in homework and that we don't need to resort to insults to try and "win" an argument.

I admire your stance. Homework is hell in this house. It’s never 💯, it takes too long, caused untold friction with DS. It’s the last thing I need after fighting to get him to school, then after school it starts again.
I would refuse but DS is a stickler for the rules, if Teacher gave out to him he’d be distraught.
The school are aware of the stress. I am thinking about requesting a meeting with them.