AIBU to still regret getting a 2:1 instead of a first?

[onedayillmoveon]

It’s been 10 years since I graduated from university and I still can’t shake off the regret that I got a 2:1 and not a first. I know that a 2:1 is perfectly fine for the vast majority of jobs and nothing to be ashamed of, my more and more people have gotten firsts for the past 20 years or so. When I graduated in 2016, about 33% of humanities graduates from my uni got firsts. I just felt so stupid, incapable, inadequate….. I know people say that grades and numbers can’t define us, but I sort of did let it.

I still can’t shake off this horrible regret that I didn’t get one. I got a high first in my second year and was so pleased, I genuinely loved my subject and had applied myself. In my final year (which largely determines degree class where I went), I became quite depressed and stressed. I could never focus and never really adequately prepared for my exams. I just can’t stop wishing that I had pulled myself together in some way.

Some of you, if you read this far, might think, “well if you have a decent job, nobody gives a damn what degree you got”, and yes, fair. Yet there are certain supposedly ‘elite’ jobs where a first is strongly preferred, and I think not getting one ruined my chances of those.

Anyway, if anyone else has ever felt the same way, or knows someone who does, and wants to share ideas or experiences, maybe that will be helpful.

Op? @onedayillmoveon

A 2:1 from Cambridge would be revered more in many circles than a 1st from bog standard uni down the road.

Thank you, you get it! To be honest I only really did a Masters to try and prove to myself that I could get a First and try to shake off the disappointment.

I’m in trading , and I have a lot of ex classmates in PE , ib, hedge fund , cfo etc type roles and trust me, whether you trot a first or 2:1 ceases to matter after you have a few years of work experience ..

Perhaps, although I think Firsts from other elite universities (Durham, LSE, UCL) are more revered by some recruiters. I don’t think there’s an exact answer to Oxbridge 2:1 vs other elite uni First.

Omg this is obsessive. If you really need to prove yourself channel this into doing a masters and getting distinction

I went to Durham and there were 9 firsts in 300 undergrads on my course. I actually quite liked having a life while I was there (and met my husband).

That's not true- I got a 2:1 from a not particularly great uni but did a grad role in a Big 4 accountancy firm and then went on to work for a Tier 1 investment bank. I also have some friends- barristers and magic circle - most of them didn't have firsts.

The key to actually getting roles in these fields is work shadowing, work experience and written answers which really focus on skills needed for roles. At the interviews you just need to be personable and confident.

Don't get hung up on degree as it's honestly not the main criteria. I was looking at CVs over the weekend and my selections were most certainly not based on degree grade.

I’m ok in my personal life, not depressed or anything. I’m single by choice and have an amazing family (parents and siblings). I enjoy running and having of my own space outside of work.

My average was 69.4 and I was so sad at my graduation... I also cried when I opened the results email and saw a 2.1 so I understand you completely. This made me obsess over studying when I did my master's and I ended up with a 79 grade average and an outstanding student award. Only then I forgave myself that 2.1

When did you go to Durham, if you don’t mind my asking?

To be brutal, if you feel undermined by your degree classification, it is perhaps unlikely that you would have had the resilience and sheer bloody-minded self-confidence to survive long term in one of these workplaces.

I did that, but I still can’t get over that undergraduate degree.

She has a distinction at masters level already.

I suggested doing another undergrad part-time through OU or similar (using credit transfer you'd only need to do 3 modules in total) if the intrusive thoughts are truly that bad.

But I guess if one is fixated on Cambridge, Durham, LSE, UCL, OU is a poor second.

Quite honestly I never give my degree classification or anyone else’s a second thought now. It’s just not relevant once you’ve been working for so many years and professional qualifications and achievements are more important.

Possibly yes, although one barrister acquaintance of mine told me that “many do then have very fragile egos underneath all of the bullishness and the marketing material about them on Chambers’ website”.

But why? What honestly do you think would be different in your life if you had got a first?

Barely anyone got firsts in art degree when I was at university- a handful of people. I think if any course is giving away 30-40% then it’s just become meaningless.

You can’t change the past. If there is something unsatisfying about your life now then you have to look at what can give you that fulfilment rather than obsessing over something that has happened and can’t be amended.

Are there many workplaces where people are still talking about where they went to uni and whether they got a first 10+ years later? It sounds juvenile.

I thought I was passionate about law as I always liked analysis and argument, from A-level onwards, but I just didn’t feel I was realistic candidate for it on paper and felt I’d be written off as “not bright enough”, which I didn’t want to do to myself. I didn’t want to spend years putting real effort into something that might never materialise .

Absolutely

I don't think it's as critical as you think OP. I got a 1st in 1999 and I was the only person to get a 1st on my course but due to ill health I haven't worked now in 18 years. I'd swap my 1st and all the top dog prizes I got back then for a healthy body and a more normal life.

Conversely my DH got a 2.2 and his friend got a 1st in their Engineering degree but my DH is now high up in one of the big five engineering firms while his friend who got a first is in a much lower, less well paid position at a smaller firm.

Also one guy I was at Uni with essentially flunked out with a third but is now a professor of robotics, another who got a 2.2 is now owns one of the biggest creative studio spaces in London and has his home featured in magazines.

To be fair for the last two family background and support probably plays a role but none the less what you get at University doesn't have as big a bearing on how things go for you as you might think.

I went to high performing school back in the day that teachers did not hold back in their cutting comments. I only passed two A levels - had I chosen better I would have got three. In my thirties I easily got that elusive third A level.

I got a 2:1 and didn’t think about it. A pass was enough to go into the career I stayed in. I think the only first went to someone who is now a professor.

I did a Masters because it helped me do my job better. I went on to do a PhD at the age of 50. I don’t really know why I felt the need. It was not for money because I could not get promotion. I can only imagine that it was the bitch of an English teacher’s cutting comments and the A level disappointment.

A long story, but I am saying that I understand you still feeling the disappointment. You have already achieved a distinction in your Masters so you know that you are capable academically. You have to look for another challenge. A marathon perhaps?

Less than 10 years before you went to Uni.

I don't think you're taking into account the entry requirements changing. When I went you needed BBB for my course whereas now I believe it's Astar Astar A so, to be honest, cohorts in the 2020s are better at exams and they are paying £8k a year more than I did so they want their money's worth. Recruiters know all this.

No, I doubt it, the first is just a foot in the door (in some places).