WIBU to give my daughter's friend a lift home in torrential rain?

[DinonneS]

A bit of advice need to how to handle this situation. So dd is 15 and walks to and from school. It’s about a 10 min walk so not far and dd has a group of friends, including one of our neighbours dd, who all walk together. Today we have had torrential rain all day so I dropped her this morning and said I’d pick her up. Messaged my neighbour (who works until 7pm) and asked if she’d also like me to pick up her dd. She said yes please so I’ve rocked up outside school to pick the two of them up. While there I see dd’s friend who lives about. 20 min walk but only a 7 min drive away and offered her a lift too and it was genuinely pouring down. She was very grateful and I know her mum so I knew she’d have no problem with it. All in all the extra drop off took me an extra 15mins and we were home at 3.10pm instead of the usual 2.55pm. Neighbour has completely kicked off that I didn’t tell her I was picking up and dropping another child while her daughter was in the car. She said we’ll be chatting about it tonight when she’s back home. Not sure what I’ve done wrong tbh

ffs - the girls are 15! Quite capable of deciding themselves whether or not to accept lifts.

Erm ok....?

I would tell her that I would not be ‘chatting about it’ tonight or any other time.

I'd be rolling my eyes but would just say something like, "Sorry, it was such a short extra detour it didn't occur to me that you'd worry."

Then if she gets really snippy about you having another child in the car, you say, politely but firmly, "Neighbour, I don't need your permission to offer a 15 year old child a lift. If you want me to run things liek this past you, then it's probably better if I just don't give your DD a lift again."

My DD is 15 and I never speak to the parents anymore. The kids all have phones. I'd offer a lift and allow the kid to communicate with their parent. I might prompt them to check with mum/ dad but they are old enough to be making some basic decisions themselbes. This is batshittery of the first order.

It is ridiculous but my mum was incredibly anxious back in the day and I’m just wondering if the normal for then is that the daughter let’s her know she’s home. Or if she was checking a ring doorbell or something.

Are you actually kidding? Id avoid that conversation as I would want to punch her for being so ungrateful.

Tell her to fuck off

The only things I can think of is the mum has fallen out with the other child's mum so doesn't think the child 'deserves ' help or she thinks the child is in someway a bad influence
Both of which are absolutely nuts reasons

Can't see what difference it makes, what a really strange oddball neighbour. Don't take any nonsense OP, you were kind.

Yeah but her kid is 15 years old, she isn't an actual child, bit weird that she didn't give a bit of grace to account for traffic/OP having a chat with someone at the school gates/one of the daughters running late coming out of school etc etc etc

I wonder if there's some issue with her daughter and this other girl - maybe she's been bullying her? It's the only thing I can think of. Well you'll find out soon enough by the sounds of it!

absolutely batshit behaviour.

I know that. But my mum would’ve been beside herself. Even if I was 15. So all I’m asking is - is there a “rule” that the girl is supposed to let her mum know she’s home perhaps? Or was the mum checking for her getting home

But would your mother have dared take issue with another mother who was doing her daughter a favour? You can be anxious but know you're being unreasonable too and just keep your mouth shut. She's incredibly rude and ungrateful

How did she know the girl was late because you gave someone else a lift? Has her daughter somehow complained to her mum? Weird whatever the reason.

How thoughtful of you OP.
You have done absolutely nothing wrong.

"we will be talking about this later"
Nope ..fuck off and don't bother contacting my number again.

Shes 15, she could be a parent herself.

Do not think you have done anything wrong here, AT ALL. You did what any other nice mum would have done. Your neighbour is very odd and very rude. If she is this worried about her daughter, I would suggest to her that probably best you don’t offer her any help in the future ‘just in case’ you offend her.
At 15 years old, this is WAY over the top behaviour from your neighbour!!!!

No good deed goes unpunished.

Tell neighbour that if she didn't want another child to be picked up then she should have mentioned that.

It's not like you picked up a strange man.

As my Mum always quotes at me, ‘at 15 I was working full time’.

Yes my mother definitely would.

you said she would be home at x time. I was expecting her.

and she would have been up to high doh.

YANBU, your neighbour is an idiot.

Yeah I cannot think of a way to rationalise this.

As others say what if the OP got caught in traffic or popped off to grab some shopping?

How and why did the neighbour even know her DD was 'so late'? Is she tracking her?

For the sake of neighbourly relations I wouldn't be too rude but I would certainly make it clear there will be no more lifts "to avoid situations like this going forwards"