Loo issue in the office

[Standingupstream]

NC for this..
I work in an office with mainly women. There is one man who is senior to us, although he isn’t our manager, and he only started coming over to our office a few months ago.We only have one loo that we all share, and before he started working in our office, this was never an issue.
Now, about 30 minutes after arriving, he disappears into the loo for ages. When he finally comes out, the smell is absolutely suffocating. There’s no window, in the loo and the air fresheners just seem to make the whole thing even more vomit-inducing.
Then, a couple of hours later, he goes again. And again after lunch. And usually once more in the afternoon. This happens pretty much every time he’s in the office, which is around 3–4 days a week.
It has now become a running joke amongst us. If someone needs the loo and it’s occupied, we ask ( other people ) if it’s him, because we all know there’s absolutely no point even attempting to go in for at least half an hour. 😂
My DH actually uses a different loo at home because I hate a poo-smelling bathroom, but obviously if it happens occasionally I’m not exactly precious about it because he’s my DH. I just find it rather gross being subjected to this at work by a man I barely know. 😂

The problem is, we genuinely don’t know what to do about it. How on earth do you approach a grown man about the fact that his toilet habits are basically fumigating the entire office, without completely humiliating him?!
I actually started to worry if he has some serious stomach issues. That would be actually completely different matter.
How would you approach it? Or should we just leave it. We are becoming very cross about it.

This is a management issue and that’s who you approach. If he’s not leaving skid marks, he’s not doing anything wrong. Management should fix the fan, provide more loos (1 for 15 people seems very low) or, if he’s actually done anything wrong, approach him. But I would complain about the facilities in general, not about your colleague, to your manager. Otherwise you’ll come across as petty and ignorant.

Come on OP, how can you possibly know he doesn’t have a stoma? Unless you’ve been intimate with him….?????!!

Not if they’re self contained.

How far is the toilet he used to use from where he works, compared to yours?
his issue maybe urgency. I have Crohn’s disease, and you get nano seconds warning that you need to go, so going downstairs to a disabled toilet would not happen.
My employer put a loo in for me, In what was a cupboard. Not ideal. But, it solved my issue and was not in the general work place, as Crohn’s, when in a flare, absolutely stinks. Not a normal stink either.

Ask if the toilet downstairs could be made a men’s or women’s and vice versa for the one in your office. From your post it sounds like he is coming over to use the toilet? Or is it actually for work?
You’ve had a lot of people say this is unkind etc but I’m with you and would find it disgusting at work and can see why you’re posting..!!

Not sure what your ‘office atmosphere’ is like, but can you have a jokey conversation around him saying ‘we’ve all agreed the upstairs loo is for wees only!! Downstairs to poo… 😄

If he’s having 3 shits over the course of a working day it seems there could be a health issue. Do you have HR or a manager? Suggest to them that there’s a can of vipoo or similar bought and he uses that.

We only have one toilet at work between 15 of us, mixed sex colleagues .

One of my colleagues has IBS...I genuinely feel sorry for them during a flare up as they politely announce to the team they may be occupying the toilet for a while and if we might need to go, go now.

I wouldn't dream of mentioning anything to anyone about toilet smells. Ours too is a windowless room and the air freshener isn't pleasant but it is what it is.

There is other toilets on site but each would mean leaving our building and I wouldn't ask someone else to do that to use the loo....if you want to use a different toilet op, thats on you but this bloke isn't doing anything abnormal. Hes having a bodily function, in the room (poorly) designed for such bodily functions

I feel you and your colleagues are coming across as gossipy and sneery about this bloke in your attitudes

I agree it’s disgusting to have to use a loo that stinks after last person uses it. All this ‘he may have a medical condition’ nonsense doesn’t make it anymore bearable & frankly I wouldn’t care if they did I don’t want to use a loo that stinks. I’ve had similar experience but with multiple men using toilet & they don’t all have medical conditions at all they’re just smelly. I wouldn’t care speak to management about the situation & see if they can put better ventilation or more facilities in place or give you single sex loos

Why don’t you use the downstairs loo?

Also how many people are in the office? There are regulations about required numbers of toilets depending on staff number

Well use the one that stinks of shit then. These are your two options. Telling the man to stick a cork up his arse is not feasible after all

But you’re happy to have the people who need to use the disabled toilet tolerate the smell you don’t want to? You’d be better off naming no names and asking HR to have the extractor looked at as it doesn’t seem to be working properly

But its acceptable for this bloke to use it purely because he doesn't leave the toilet designated for your office smelling pleasant enough for you and your colleagues?

Ok.....

well either you know him REALLY well or you have seen him naked.....

It’s not like I’m timing him but 10min too me is ages

It's a single occupancy toilet.
The only reason to have sex segregation is for decency and privacy - only one person is using it at any time, so no one's privacy is being threatened.

Would this matter less if it was a stinky woman? We all poop, and some have medical conditions.

Well then why don’t YOU go downstairs and use the toilet there ?? It sounds horrible, you all laughing and complaining about this man behind his back. The lot of you go use this other toilet snd shut-up.

100%

For those who keep saying this - single self contained loos don’t apply.

OP I experience the same at my work and I’m also the person responsible to sort it out so this is what I’d advise:

Approach facilities management and ask them to replace the extractor with a more powerful one and/ or adjust the timer so it runs for longer. It’s likely set to run a few mins only.
Request they clear out the extractor and check its free of dust.
Not all air fresheners are equal - ask them to provide proper neutralising air freshener and the spray or drops you put in the pan first - they are quite effective. Then communicate this to staff asking them to use it.

Use the disabled loo yourself instead but inform management / HR that at present most people are having to use the disabled loo due to the terrible smell.

We have a lot of men at my office do this too and it’s unpleasant/ sometimes impossible for the rest of us. None of them have a stoma or IBS (I would actually be aware because of my job title) they just like to go and sit and scroll the internet for a break and get paid for having a shit - I have literally overheard them joke about this - and they eat terrible diets with a lot of dominos/ kebabs etc. so it really is unpleasant for everyone else.

for people saying Op has the other toilet, it’s not that simple, from what I understand he stinks out the whole office. If it was just the toilet he was stinking out I’d agree a relatively easy fix is for everyone to troop down to the other toilet.

But the smell is permeating the office.

Assuming the disabled toilet downstairs isn’t close enough for him to be affecting anyone else’s working space downstairs(?) it’s much better for him or anyone else with frequently smelly poos to use that if out of the way of others.

It’s one thing hold your nose in the toilet and another thing having to sit and work at your desk with the smell of toilet wafting around.

Googling also suggests your workplace does not have enough toilets. The disabled toilet isn’t counted in the required provision.

Then you need to report the faulty extractor fan to HR and get it fixed on H & S grounds…….if there’s no window that can be opened then there should be a working fan! And keep on at them until the fan gets fixed!

I don’t know if there’s any specific laws but that’s a ridiculous amount of people for 1 toilet. We have 3 for 20 staff

The whole issue is the lack of adequate ventilation in the toilet area and the proximity to the office. That is what the OP needs to focus on and the fact that there is only one toilet available to 15 staff, other than the disabled toilet. This issue could have been bought to management easily and quickly without a group of women cackling on about this poor man.

I agree too. How is this person not aware of the stink. That’s disgusting. He has an option to use the downstairs one knowing he is stinking out the office. There is no way he doesn’t know and there is no way that anyone should just accept sitting and working in that environment