Loo issue in the office

[Standingupstream]

NC for this..
I work in an office with mainly women. There is one man who is senior to us, although he isn’t our manager, and he only started coming over to our office a few months ago.We only have one loo that we all share, and before he started working in our office, this was never an issue.
Now, about 30 minutes after arriving, he disappears into the loo for ages. When he finally comes out, the smell is absolutely suffocating. There’s no window, in the loo and the air fresheners just seem to make the whole thing even more vomit-inducing.
Then, a couple of hours later, he goes again. And again after lunch. And usually once more in the afternoon. This happens pretty much every time he’s in the office, which is around 3–4 days a week.
It has now become a running joke amongst us. If someone needs the loo and it’s occupied, we ask ( other people ) if it’s him, because we all know there’s absolutely no point even attempting to go in for at least half an hour. 😂
My DH actually uses a different loo at home because I hate a poo-smelling bathroom, but obviously if it happens occasionally I’m not exactly precious about it because he’s my DH. I just find it rather gross being subjected to this at work by a man I barely know. 😂

The problem is, we genuinely don’t know what to do about it. How on earth do you approach a grown man about the fact that his toilet habits are basically fumigating the entire office, without completely humiliating him?!
I actually started to worry if he has some serious stomach issues. That would be actually completely different matter.
How would you approach it? Or should we just leave it. We are becoming very cross about it.

As I thought.

Says everything really...

I don't think @Miss888 is worth arguing with. Anyone with an ounce of compassion understands your point of view. I won't say what I think about those that don't. Multiple people have tried to explain what could be the issue here but there are those who are still determined to think the worst of a man they have never met. It's sad honestly. Don't let them get you down.

This is what needs addressing. If there is no opening window there should be an extractor fan linked to the light switch. Bring this immediately to the attention of HR/HS rep.

The world needs more people like you. How lovely are you 🥰

Id just go to the downstairs loo myself and avoid the one he uses altogether

Why don’t you use the downstairs loo???

Only good if there is a ventilation exit shaft to take away any odours, I'm sure other people there smell too.

There isn’t a light switch. The light and extractor fan turns on automatically when you walk in and then automatically turns off when no movement is detected in a certain amount of the time.

Yes but the overpowering smell has taken over the workplace as it's so close hence he needs to pop downstairs.

I can see how some are protecting on here, those with illnesses etc but many of us deal wirh conditions either directly or with relatives and we must always consider others too. The loo he uses frequently is so close to his colleagues that they suffer the aftermath and that isn't ok.

Then I would suggest the toilets are unfit for purpose and hr should be looking at the extraction system rather than staff impugning the poor chap with his (probable) disability.

Thank you for the replies the helpful advice.
There is a lot of discussion here about legality or discrimination of employees with medical conditions. When I said this man is senior to us, I meant he is not an employee ( more like a partner in the company ). I don’t know if that makes him my employer ( his business employs me ) but it definitely makes him someone my colleagues and I or HR would not openly talk to about this issue. We don’t want to make things awkward in the office and we wouldn’t want to make him feel embarrassed or humiliated. Or maybe he doesn’t give a shit ( no pun intended).
Anyway, my manager had a meeting with our site manager and she is organising inspection of the office loo and hopefully installation of better extraction fan.

Aw thank you. My husband had his large bowel removed due to cancer and I've been letting myself get upset reading some of these comments wondering if anyone has ever talked about him like that. But anyone who has is not someone I have any respect for so I really shouldn't let it bother me.

But as i keep on saying many of us have or have relatives with serious conditions and that does not mean we don't consider other people whilst managing whatever issues us or relatives have.

I wouldn't humiliate anyone but nor would I meekly suffer when there are other solutions to a problem situation that is adversely affecting others.

My son has bowel issues due to cancer too but with him, it was his small bowel.

It makes me think that maybe he should just be a NEET when he gets older, go on PIP and not even attempt to work with his disability. Of course, plenty of people whinge about that too.

So what do you expect the poor man to do about it? It’s sounds like he might have IBS

Without knowing his condition if he has one, no one can actually say what the best solution is.

If he has urgency issues, using the toilet further away won't be an option.

I have every sympathy for those with bowel issues here. I truly do. But that's not the real issue here.

Bowel issues do not stop him using those sachets provided? Or using the drops (that I didn't know existed, but if I had bowel issues which I was self conscious about, would be aware of).

The issue here isn't the smell. It's the smell PLUS him choosing not to take action to minimise it.

That is what is inconsiderate.
And for that, there is no excuse.

I can't believe all the "himpathy" being shown. If women are in the majority in your office, then this man, whatever his problem, can use the disabled loo. Especially if he has a stoma, or other abdominal issue.
How ridiculous to suggest that the women use the disabled toilet instead. JC ladies, it's 2026, not 1926. Women have only had toilets outside the home for about 100 years ( see the urinary leash) and they had to fight for them. Don't give them up so easily.

This is the most likely scenario.

This. ^ I am not sure why a small handful of posters seem to think the rights, wants, needs etc. of this one seemingly precious man, trump the rights, wants, and needs of 15 other people! There seem to be a few people defending him furiously. It's very odd. 🤔

I'm glad to hear you wouldn't humiliate anyone. You did make an assumption that this man you have never met is inconsiderate and lazy though which suggests a lack of tolerance on your part. OP makes her own husband use a different toilet to her so there's a chance she is overly sensitive and the issue might not even be as bad as she describes. But many people are happy to assume that this is just a horrible lazy man.

Lots of people have suggested practical solutions which are now being pursued according to OP's update, and which don't involve asking him to use a different toilet which may not be suitable. Hopefully they will be able to fix the situation.

Yep, as I said, THIS is the most likely scenario.

As people have said several times now, if he has urgency issues, it isn't going to be that simple as the disabled loo is further away.

My personal experience tells me that most men are not selfish and lazy and they actually do give a shit about others. (I appreciate that not everyone will share my experience.) This is true of men in my family, my friends, my colleagues and my patients who come from all walks of life. I therefore don't automatically assume that someone who uses a toilet to do a poo does it to deliberately inconvenience everyone else in his office. I assume he does it because he needs to. It's utterly bizarre that so many people are vilifying a man they have never met due to bodily functions beyond his control.

I am a nurse though so my tolerance to bad smells is likely higher than most people's. 😂