AIBU to still feel shaken after drunk men made vile comments on Wizz Air flight?

[morello1]

I think I need a bit of a mum hug, because I keep wanting to cry about something that happened on a flight recently.

I was with my DD9 and there were three very drunk men I'd say early 30s sitting behind her. They'd moved seats during the flight and had been drinking heavily, getting louder and more obnoxious as the flight went on - really vile stuff. She had head phones on so I thought don't start a scene just ignore and get off.

Towards the end though you have to put away devices and as we were standing to get off I pointed at my DD and gave them a pleading sort of look, just so they realised there was a child sitting in front of them. I didn't confront them just guestured.
One of them put his hand on my arm said, “You're right, it's not funny. sorry love”
The other then said grinning:
“It is funny if I rape the fucking kid.”
The first one immediately said he'd gone too far using the “R word”, and they all laughed.

I was completely stunned. I didn't know what to say. I just wanted to get my daughter away from them, so I got her off the plane as quickly as I could. I told the staff as I was leaving that I needed to make a complaint and I was crying at that point but the staff were kids and just looked at me blankly I wanted to get my DD as far away from them as poss as quickly as poss

back in england I've reported it to the police. They initially seemed to take it very seriously, particularly because these were three drunk men on a flight making an explicit comment about a child. I've got a crime reference number and the airport police have contacted Wizz Air.
It seems to be difficult to identify the men because they'd moved seats during the flight, and the police are having difficulty getting the booking/payment details relating to the seat changes. They haven't said it's closed, but I have a new officer who gives the impression they were trying to manage my expectations.

I've also complained to Wizz Air and, despite sending everything they've asked for and chasing them twice, they've basically not responded. ZERO.

And now I don't know whether I should just leave it.
I keep thinking I should have done something differently. Got the cabin crew details. Confronted them. Made more of a fuss. But honestly, I was shocked and my only thought was getting my DD away from them and fast.

I know I've reported it and I've done what I can. But I can't seem to stop replaying it.
How do you actually move on from something like this? Would you keep pursuing it, or would you draw a line under it and try to forget about it?
I think I just need some mums to tell me I'm not being ridiculous for still being really really upset about it.

Well done for reporting it. That is horrendous - far, far beyond banter or a joke. I hope your daughter is okay.

I have never flown Wizz Air and never will, having heard how they have failed to respond to you and how they served already drunk men.

As you have already tried quietly, I would contact them publicly on Twitter about this, or contact your MP.

umm what the actual fuck.

If someone said that in ear shot regardless of if it was towards my child or someone else's or even just to other adults I would have absolutely made a scene. I just would.

if it was directed at my child id have raised hell on earth. Idc if I inconvenience the flight crew the other passengers or delay a flight if you talk about fucking raping my child or ANY child I would make sure the whole fucking plane new about it so they know what a disgusting pig has been sat amongst us.

That's what I'd have done.

it's too late now but I wouldn't drop it and get over it. sorry but you do not know who has potential to do shit like that and I wouldn't let it slide. Id actually want him to be on the sex offenders register. I'm very OTT about stuff like that coz you know it isn't funny is it it's disgusting and people like that do exist amongst us and they need to be called out shamed and have consequences.

no normal person jokes about that even when they are drunk. dirty bastard.

So sorry OP. Keep on at the airline. Do you have Social media could you make a post about it.
He's a disgusting vile man. Is your DD OK?

You did the right thing by getting her out the way and staying calm. I fear I’d have chosen violence in this situation and flew for the cunt, probably ended up arrested myself. Keep chasing it up it can’t be that hard to trace them!

You don't always know how you would react in the same situation. I froze when I was sexually assaulted. Would have sworn I would fight before it happened. With a child in a threatening situation, your instinct may be to go small for protection.

Same. I'd have called the police then and there and demand security detain them for threatening to rape my 9 year old. If this didn't happen, it would be me getting arrested because I'd have hurt them.

Try posting it as publicly as possible on social media or approaching a newspaper. Shame them into responding.

You did the right thing prioritising getting your daughter away without escalating things. I would have been frightened and done the same. I'm so sorry this happened to you.

I didn’t want to move the flight was full apart from the extra leg room seats that these men moved to so they could sit together- they were also in a bigger group split up so moving would have meant me and my daughter would be separated and possibly ended up with one of their mates that they were walking back and forth from from time to time

Thank you for this I did freeze I was in total shock as I suppose they had intended

and thanks everyone for your support. Do feel beyond furious I’m sick of the “manosphere” the female police officer who called me back used that word to describe the surge in aggression in public towards women that she is dealing with daily but found this deeply troubling herself too.

I do know not much will come of it but I’m so angry the airline has blanked me for weeks now. After the weekend they will be outside their advertised time scale of dealing with customer complaints so I will be able to escalate it with them.

Also the police confirmed it didn’t make a difference if they were looking into to also and that I could should still pursue it with Wizz. Some good thoughts here about ways to do that and bypass the normal official complaint channels so I’ll think about that now too like tagging the airline in a tweet etc

I feel stupid for not getting images of them but at the point of the incident I was standing and getting my stuff as I’d endured them for the flight and was ready to get the hell away from them I just didn’t expect this turn it caught me so off guard especially as one of them had “sided” with me and laid his hand on my arm as a sort of yes you are right dear patronising gesture

im so sad to hear other stories here also thank you for sharing everyone who has it leaves such a long bad taste in your mouth

Same. We would all be getting taken off the plane in cuffs if they dared have said that in front of me.

OP, I can’t believe nobody else on the plane said anything to them, did other people hear that comment?!

They used the R word about a child. That’s certainly not something to be shrugging your shoulders about. Being drunk and causing a ruckus using bad language is one thing making jokes about r a child is very very very much another

On a couple of Jet 2 flights (Malaga) I've seen the captain holding back and dealing with drunk men at the end of the flights. I wouldn't want to fly Wizz Air after hearing this behaviour wasn't reported by staff during the flight to the captain.

So sorry OP, this is horrible.
Ive a DD that age and my blood runs cold just reading about what happened.
For what it’s worth I would have reacted the same as you- I’d be shocked, scared and probably crying- rightly or wrongly, I was always taught ‘never to make a scene’.
You handled this very well. I hope your DD is ok.
Write to the CEO, head of customer service, every contact email you can find for Wizz air.
Share details of everything on social media, to the local paper , do everything you can to find this cunt.
I’ll never fly with Wizz air and i’ll be telling my friends and family not to either.
I hope karma bites this vile specimen on the arse.
Sending hugs to you and your daughter.

OP, if you tweet about this, maybe you could do it with a new handle (if you don’t want to out yourself) and then post it here and we can all retweet for you?

Another reason why alcohol should be banned.

Why aren't you doing as suggested put on social media or Twitter if your really concerned about it?

I'm so sorry you and your daughter had to deal with these disgusting scumbags.

Might be worth quoting their pr drive for gender equality to them.

www.wizzair.com/en-gb/information-and-services/about-us/news/2025/03/08/flying-towards-diversity-wizz-air-expands-opportunities-for-women-in-aviation

Same. Absolutely vile and really upsetting and unsettling.

Exactly right.

Straight onto their X/Twitter page, Instagram, the works.

I would @ the CEO, COO, all of them. I would letting parents know when it comes to holiday booking etc.

This would be a good thread for the DM to pick up but...

Did no one else on the flight hear this and say something?!

I think you made the right call, I'd want my kids away from them as well