AIBU to change schools over my husband helping a neighbour?

[Schoolchanging]

Dh had always done school drop off and pick up due to my work hours and over the last 18 months I’d got increasingly irritated by him walking with or giving a lift to a neighbour whose child goes to the same school.

So I decided we would change dc to a different school a little further away and they are due to start there in a couple of weeks.

I didn’t want to spend time on discussions and boundaries and wanted to just eliminate the stress on our relationship. I told him I wasn’t comfortable that I’d asked him to stop and as he wasn’t I was changing schools to which he said ‘fine that’s your choice’. Dc are ok about it as we know people who go to the new school as well.

Neighbour has just spoken to us as we were leaving at the same time and she said to dh ‘back to the usual routine soon then!’ And I said ‘actually no, dc are going to be at a different school so all change for us !’ To which she turned to dh and said ‘why haven’t you told me this already?’ Which I found odd.

This 💯
I've read some bonkers stories on MN but this a new level of unreasonable

Your children are paying the price for your batshit behaviour. How unhinged.

It isn't odd, they are school-parent-friends and a child changing schools is a big event, not that you (or your DH) give a shit, so you'd expect it mentioned, to a neighbour you chat to. Have you considered that she's a decoy and the lollipop lady is the real OW?

Does your husband have form for cheating? If not this is a very bizarre and controlling reaction! And tbh even if he does have form you should be thinking of leaving him not moving the children’s schools!!

This, and the other school mum post this morning are going down well with my bucket of popcorn.

Your poor kid. Mummy puts her insecurities over her relationship before his well being. Kids and families walk to school together all the time. When my kid was in primary like we like near the school, I walked with the dad from opposite a lot, and the mum from the opposite way and the dad from up the street, because we all had to walk over the SAME BIT of street to get to school, and THE SAME time to get to school at the right time. Plus when the kids were in year 6, the parents could just pull out and the kids walked together. You probably need to deal with you insecurities about you husband and stop punishing your kid for your odd issues.

It's nuts to me that 8% of people on this thread find OP reasonable.

If he's up to something with the neighbour changing the kids school won't stop it. But it will disrupt your children's lives and education.

I would imagine she was really surprised to suddenly find out that she won't have help with the school run any more, it would have been nice to give her some warning if she is relying on the help.

Is this a reverse and your the neighbour living next door to a batshit crazy woman?

And is it really that easy to change schools?

What did I just read?! This can’t be real. If it is then this is abusive towards both the husband and the children.

This is possibly the most irrational thing I have ever read on here (and the competition is fierce).

Either there is a huge back story with trust in your husband which you have completely glossed over with your comment about “boundaries” or you are pathologically jealous and controlling.

You are choosing to uproot your children because you have the hump about your husband giving someone a lift to school? What the actual? If you actually suspect cheating you have a much bigger problem which you won’t fix by changing schools. If you don’t suspect cheating you are just a control freak.

Either way, the solution you are imposing is a bit like using a nuclear weapon to remove a stain from clothing: vastly and disproportionately destructive to your children, your marriage and your life.

You need to be honest with yourself about what the real problem is here. There’s a lot more going on than what you have disclosed.

The lollipop lady at the other school, perhaps?

Madness - you do realise there will be women walking/driving kids to the new school too, what if he makes a friend going in the same direction there too.

What on earth are you going to say when people ask why you’ve moved schools? DH was chatting to a neighbour? 😂

Changing schools isn’t a simple process, especially when they already have a place in a school. You went to all that effort because your husband spent time with a friend? What does your child think? Does the new school have a better reputation, is the location better, what about parking, the commute and all the other jobs that get tagged onto the school run?

If he is going to have an affair with her, changing schools isn't going to stop him. Or stop him talking to other people. It might even encourage him!

you sound insane. Poor kids

Missing the point of this thread, but your neighbour should be making their own arrangements for their child/ren to get to/from school themselves!

Op, I don't have enough words to describe how utterly unreasonable you are.

I feel so sorry for your children and your DH. I suspect he'll leave soon because of your unreasonable behaviour.

😂

I was thinking that too. Are they going to havevto move house?

Another fake thread?

To which she turned to dh and said ‘why haven’t you told me this already?’……….at which point I would have said…..” we’re telling you now”!

Nah this is too batshit to be true.

Lots things missing from this especially what it was about original situation that bothered you? Don't you think that might have been helpful to include? Otherwise it makes you out to be some crazy person that changes their kids school just because another woman talks to her husband

He does all drop offs and pick ups of course he will get friendly with other parents as you would as well. Are you going to change schools each time he gets friendly with another parent?