AIBU to be angry that my husband is unconcerned about women’s safety?

[Peedoffdoesntcutit]

To be pissed off with my husband. I said how upset I am that the child abuse and rape leaflet from the government is judged as necessary and we are continuing to let these men into our country who pose a threat to women. He just shrugged - I said doesn’t it bother you these men are coming into our society. We have daughters , I am a woman. I absolutely do not feel safe anymore where we live and would not walk on my own anymore. He said no not really. Absolutely furious with him. Does he not have to care as he’s a big tall man? I’m so pissed off, I’ve walked off and he’s given me the ick.

They’re not just coming from Afghanistan you know. so why keep comparing the UK to Afghanistan, genuinely would like to know your rationale on this?

Of course, so where has similar rights for women and girls who will then get the leaflet?

In a population of 60 million people yes, it is rare.

I dint give a fuck if it's rare or not. One rape of one child is one too many, never mind a whole groomed group. FFS.

So what's the point of all you angry people

You just want everyone to shut up go away and when you consider you successfully close the discussion, you go and attack other people who are worried about VAWG? This is why so many people support Iran I suppose. They're quite happy with women and girls being treated like that

and this is MUMSNET ffs

Sudan and Congo aren’t much kinder when it comes to women, there has been mass slaughter, rapes, barbarism, yet many who carried out these attacks are running from persecution not prosecution.
The jailbreak in the Congo where 100 women were raped before being burnt alive. The Christian community in Nigeria butchered by machete attacks, babies too, yes, I know, it’s not just Afghanistan and Iran. There are sooo many countries that human rights against women are violated, we’re bringing the issue to Western Europe.

@EmeraldShamrock000 exactly
I can only think that some of the angry posters on the thread don't know about this

How is it whataboutery to compare to Afghanistan, when many of the men arriving here are from Afghanistan? The same men who are abusing the women there. We can see clearly their attitude towards women and girls from the way they behave in their own country. I don't understand why you want that shutting down.
Would you prefer to discuss the way men treat women in Eritrea instead? Lots of men from there are now in the UK. They don't lose that attitude as soon as their feet touch British soil.

Eh?

Of course it is, who said otherwise? What are you doing to protect women and girls in your area/family/networks?

Why do we assume that all the men in Afghanistan agree with the Taliban? I mean obviously some do, and we don’t necessarily know who. But to assume that those running away from the Taliban are somehow in agreement with every mad thing they’ve done is surely not reasonable?

The Afghan men you hear about are the ones who do awful things. Do you actually know any Afghan men in person?

I grew up in quite a well off area and I was always frightened of those Cockney/Essex geezer type men, assuming they’d be racist and violent. How ignorant of me, because now I know that’s not the case.

We all have prejudices, that’s normal, but it seems self harming to cement them based on horror stories.

Creating awareness. There is men patrolling areas in the cities in Ireland. They would be referred to as far right but they’re parents who are sick of immigrants sitting in children’s park, using drugs, smoking crack, leering at women. They don’t approach anyone as there has been a few occasions if immigrants carrying knifes. It’s more to create a visual awareness.

Are you about to try and say that the men arriving in Europe from Afghanistan are leaving because they don't like how women are treated in their own country? Does that really make sense to you?

Why didnt they patrol when it was local men taking heroin and doing pretty much the same things?

Local addicts don’t sit in children’s parks, they sit in laneways, hide from public view.
There has been a huge increase of men sitting in play parks, that was never socially acceptable in the past, nor was 20 people a day using the bush area in the park as a toilet.
Even addicts have social skills.

No, I thought I’d make it easy by saying what I meant.

Feel free to engage with what I actually said, or not. But we’re a bit old for guessing games.

I think it's very sensible to explain to men requesting asylum that the laws and expectations of behaviour in the UK may be very different than their home countries. Many of them will already be fully aware but explaining in detail what is considered rape and what is consent, what is domestic abuse, what is harassment etc, etc in UK law, seems like a good idea. It doesn't mean the government thinks all of these men are a danger to women.

You’re not even in England? 🤣 Oh god what a joke. There was a time when people called for internment for all the Irish in England off the back of a handful of violent ones. And now here you are saying you don’t want them ‘here’ (there?)

Oh stop

Do you think this is an England problem. I get that you’re pretty insulated in your views. This disgusting problem is happening all over Europe.
There was also a time in Ireland when English people were not welcome, attacked and even executed, so I can understand the worry in England as the Irish people did wish harm on them and did cause harm.

It was standard practice to hate the English people. We moved on, not without a lot of pain and bloodshed but sounds like you’re happy to repeat the experience this time around with the Muslim extremism, Ireland were puppies in comparison.

Oh I understand exactly what you meant. You're gaslighting.
If you can explain how we sort out the Afghan men who treat women worse than livestock from those who don't, I'm all ears. As abusing women is virtually encouraged there, I doubt the Taliban keep records. We don't deport them either way btw, even after they've committed a crime. If we wait until they commit a sexual offence before we find out, the damage is already done.

Why do you find it funny that the pp is not in England, but in Ireland? They are also facing the same issue, as are Scotland and Wales.

The IRA? They were pretty good terrorists, bombings all over England and killings all over Ireland. I don't think you would have called them puppies at the time and I wouldn't say it loudly in some Irish pubs now.

I don’t find funny necessarily, maybe insanely hypocritical that she’s been talking about NIMBYism when this isn’t her backyard, and not wanting foreign men when, again, she is not even here to be affected.

I’m not at all, I’m telling you my point of view very clearly. Maybe you can’t imagine a woman thinking differently to you.