AIBU to be annoyed guests announced vegan diets on arrival?

[Wtafdidido]

Wtafdidido · Today 11:27
I have guests. They have stayed before. No dietary requirements and no food dislikes. To accommodate them my child has to vacate her bedroom and spend the week on an airbed in our room which she very kindly does. Anyway guests have arrived and I have shopped, meal planned and prepared lunch, homemade quiche etc . They have now said “since we last visited we have both become vegetarian and dairy free as it is healthier” - so basically vegan. I am so annoyed. Had I been given the heads up I could have prepared and shopped accordingly . Aibu to be hacked off and have said that given their failure to let me know I won’t be able to accommodate that but can use what I have bought and minimise the amount of meat or they can shop for their own supplies and cook for us all? To be clear had I known in advance I would have accommodated their dietary fads. To be clear there is no medical grounds for any of this. They were already getting a week of free food and board and as we live in a very desirable holiday location would have been paying in the region of £800 to book an air BnB. They are not really family either and have in the past been ok guests though last time they were bemused I had not taken A week off to entertain them and take them places.

(And I agree, it doesn't sound like you like them very much!)

I would just say “I have shopped and prepped on the basis of what you ate last time. How shall we handle this - can you eat this without the meat, or do you want to go shopping and prep the meal?”
Put it into their court, and be clear that you will not be spending any more money or going to any effort beyond that originally planned.

Gah. I remember putting a bowl of chicken soup in front of a lunch guest who only then thought to mention she was vegetarian. It's so rude and thoughtless to do this! (She only ate a potato from the rest of her lunch and went out to smoke instead, bloody teens). I was actually a guest as well but seemed to end up doing a lot of the hosting, thankfully have not had to see them since.

I would not be hosting these people again @Wtafdidido, they sound like total users.

I’d be really tempted to say no problem at all, obviously as you didn’t tell me the meals aren’t necessarily vegan but it’s no issue you can leave anything that doesn’t fit your diet. Let them just eat salad or veg!

They'll have to go buy their food then.

Why would you make your kid give her room to these freeloaders? That's uncalled for. Give them an air mattress on the floor and stop having them.

“What a shame you didn’t mention it before I shopped and cooked for your stay. I’m afraid I can’t afford to do another shop, so would you like to just avoid the bits you don’t want to eat, or go to the supermarket yourselves?”

Outrageous not to mention it and still expect to be catered for. Ridiculous, who are these people!?

Of course YANBU.

Just say oh thats a shame as I've already done the meal planning and food shop.

Serve exactly what you were planning on serving anyway then some bread and margarine. They can eat the bread and margarine if they

🙄🙄
Way to miss the point completley

I'm puzzling over what you can do?

I think you probably need to say to them you'd shopped and meal planned so could they help in re-planning the meals as most of the things you'd planned wouldn't work? And would they be OK to maybe take a turn at cooking a few of the meals themselves as it's a bit outside your comfort zone good meals that would work for everyone (ie: including your own family)?

Yanbu op and I'm sorry you have to endure them.

But... I love a good cheeky fuckery story. Guaranteed, this is not the only way they are unreasonable guests. People like this leave the bathroom a mess, borrow your stuff without asking, are noisy at night, and absurdly critical about everything.

Dh and I haven't had anyone stay the night since before lockdown. Life is so peaceful!

As a 'faddy' vegan of 25 years YANBU! What inconsiderate guests.

As many have suggested, 'This is what I've planned, do you want to go to X supermarket and get some alternatives that could work instead of the (meat/dairy component)?

They can sort themselves out then. You need to stop letting them stay as they are entitled, disruptive and it doesn’t sound like you like them anyway.

That's terrible behaviour.

I would tell them that, say that you had no idea their food preferences had changed so dramatically as they didn't tell you prior to arriving, you've already shopped, they are welcome to join you for the meals you will be making but if they are unsuitable, they will have to sort their own food out.
It so cheeky of them to expect you to feed them for a whole week anyway ... maybe this will make them staying a bit easier for you.

Crazy they didn’t tell you. I have v specific dietary needs for health reasons and always tell hosts well in advance and often take some of my own food for an overnight stay.

I have friends who are vegan and also nut allergic and always cater to their needs but I have to know in advance. Now your guests can buy some of their own food.

'oh right, I'll put the meat I bought I the freezer for later then. I'm fine with you getting your own food, don't worry about it at all'

Then never have them back.

What will you actually do? Surely we're all too polite to tell them to piss off? Sounds like they eat eggs. Could accommodate for breakfast and lunch then do their own dinner or go out (and they pay).

That's completely unreasonable and they should've told you in advance. I'd be very clear and show them the food you've already bought and the meals you've planned.

They'll have to sort themselves out.

I say this as a vegan: cheeky, entitled fuckers. You must be fuming.

How old is your dd? She might be able to save this situation.

When i was about 4, my dm agreed to have an old school friend to stay but didn't stipulate an end date. I overheard my dm whingeing to my sister after about a week than she didn't know when the friend would leave. (Dsis and I had also given up our bedroom for her).

I boldly marched up to the woman and simply asked "When will you leave?" And she sort of tittered and said "oh why aren't you enjoying my visit?" And I simply said no. She left later that day and my dm showered me with praise, it's one of my proudest memories.

Depending on your dd's age, she could do the same for you?

@Wtafdidido I see a lot of dry toast in their future!
Very rude.
I had this late announcement a Christmas dinner one - they did not eat any vegetables and told me on the day
Suggest they do a shop that goes with what you have in - for example some more mushrooms, non dairy milks and cheeses etc, hopefully your planned stuff will adapt a bit
If it does not it is on them for not telling you!

They really are spectacularly rude. This should be their last freeload visit to you.

I would cook them what you’ve already bought that’s vegan —and don’t try to make it interesting— so pasta and tomato sauce, mushroom risotto, baked potatoes with beans. While you eat the lovely food you’d planned for them!

I had the same a friend id known forever was coming to dinner with friends, i told everyone i was cooking lasagne from scratch and she turned up and said shes veggie, i was furious so she ate nothing as i had nothing in to feed her in was so bloody angry...she said i thought you knew, i said if someone is cooking you dinner you remind them that youre veggie

‘Great, we aren’t though, so you’ll need to sort your own food if you can’t eat what we have planned’

That is awful. I am vegan and there is absolutely no way I would ever turn up anywhere without saying this (and bringing stuff with me) and then expect someone to cook me food without knowing this. They sound very entitled. I think I might ask them to go shopping for the food they can eat and suggest they might want to cook it themselves.

'Oh, I don't know how to cook vegan... but you're welcome to sort your own food.'

I respect food intolerances - I'm gluten free myself but I TELL people - but if it's just faddism, you usually find they're tucking into the quiche by Day 2...