AIBU to feel overwhelmed by an overly involved next-door neighbour?

[Seaswimmer23]

I’ve recently moved from London to a smallish town in Lancashire for work. I’ve found a lovely place to live, but the place not issue is my next-door neighbour. She’s been friendly since I moved in, inviting me in for tea, and chatting every time I step outside. And it’s this. I have a busy job and value my peace and independence. I now can’t step outside without a full rundown of her day, and a grilling about mine. I’ve tried to say I’m rushing, I often am, and I’m always polite, but I feel like I’m 15 again not being able to do anything without a million questions and a million moans. If I’m staying in with a book or film she phones me, several times, then knocks if I don’t answer as my phone is on silent. She keeps track of my every move! I love living here but it’s can’t bear this. I’m considering moving. Oh and she has a key, given to her by the landlady. AIBU?

Fuck me, there are two of them wandering the earth!! Has Bedlam had a jailbreak?

BTW I would be tempted to start freezing weird things in your freezer

Fake hands
Fake fingers
Fake eyes

Buy a ring doorbell & tell neighbour that you have installed CCTV

No need for her to go into your property ever

That doesn’t matter. It’s your home - landlord is so wrong here. Tell the neighbour to piss off. This is not a northern thing, it’s a cheeky fucker thing.

Sounds as though the landlady is using the neighbour to report back to her.
Totally inappropriate, nosey, intrusive to your privacy.
She let the property to you. If the landlady didn’t want to do and now wants it for someone else or wants to sell it, so she should not have done so.
You should be able to enjoy your property in peace and quiet. While you are renting it the space is yours.
Check your contract wording closely.
I would ask for the key from your neighbour. That is unacceptable. She cannot give a key to the neighbour without your permission. Although I suspect the neighbour will just have it copied if she hasn’t already got duplicates.
Your landlady needs to understand a few facts about being one. Tell her you are deeply unhappy about this level of intrusion, that it needs to stop.
I would look to leave this property and find somewhere else. I would get some legal advice.
I would register your concerns with a solicitor and ask what your situation is if you leave early. Also, go back to the agents who worked on behalf of the landlady and tell them all is not well too.

You need to speak to your landlady pronto.

Completely unacceptable to give a neighbour your key, she is interfering with 'your right to quiet enjoyment' of the property and has completely overstepped the mark by going in without your permission or knowledge. Landlords have to give 24 hours notice to go into any rented property and you have to give your express permission for them to do so. You want the key taken off the neighbour or you are reporting to the local council.

I would have tried "fuck the fuck off"!

Am afraid the neighbour is not being neighbourly. No neighbour who was would agree to this level of intrusion into a neighbours life. Nor hold a key. They would not agree to do so. There is nothing friendly about her behaviour at all.

I would have been inclined to give her the things she put in your freezer back to her.

I disagree. I am northern and friendly - happily chat to strangers. I don’t, and would not, however, let myself into someone’s house unless it was an emergency. Even then, only if I thought the person was injured/extremely unwell.

Not northern, batshit.

Oh OP that’s really shit! I would consider moving too!
Tell your landlord that your insurance requires no other keys and you are uncomfortable that she let herself in and it’s illleagl and you are changing the locks. Or just actually change them and don’t tell her, you are entitled to do so.

Possibly the accommodation came with kitchen appliances including a freezer so in the ndn’s mind the freezer belongs to her friend the LL. Bonkers.

I had nosy neighbours at my last house. I would say hello, sorry in a rush can’t stop! Keep walking and never stopped. When I returned home I’d say hello, nice to see you x, so sorry, I’ve got to put dinner on/expecting a phone call, and keep walking past her to get in without stopping. As long as you smile and say hello every time there won’t be a fall out. There’s nothing you can do about the key as she’s a friend of the landlady, but she shouldn’t be entering the property you’re renting unless it’s an emergency on behalf of the landlady.

This is crazy. I'm from Yorkshire and my neighbours do not have a key. Our friends do - across the other side of town, for feeding pets!

And no, do not sit down and tell the neighbour not to come in. It's not on you to have the confrontation.

I think this is the best approach too. You don’t know what happened with the last neighbours, maybe she is investing too much as a result of that. Talking is the best course of action.

Well you could have a fall out - a large piece of frozen salmon has gone missing from your freezer - someone’s taken it, it cost nearly £52 -contact landlady and insist locks are changed. ………
I would think she would fall over herself saying she knows nothing about it -which you accept -but I doubt the ‘friendship’ will be the same again