To not understand the cost of living crisis?

[tiggerbouncy]

Fully prepared to be told I’m being tone deaf here.

Before I start I want to caveat this and say I live in the North and I am comparing to other Northerners, as I know the South is a bit of a different ball game.

I earn less than the national average salary. I have recently had my biggest ever pay rise which has put me on 25k for 35 hrs a week. My partner is on similar but has a lower hourly wage (works more hours though). In total our household income is approx 45-50k ish?

We own our home (via mortgage) and we paid for the deposit with no family help.

We go on at least one or two foreign holidays a year and frequently enjoy meals out and day trips to different places.

We have two cats (one of whom has needed very expensive vet treatment) and soil them rotten.

A lot of my peers constantly moan that the cost of living being so high is trapping them either at home with parents, renting, not being able to go on holidays etc etc. Basically, I’ve had a few comments recently about our lifestyle being really hard to achieve and how it’s unfair we enjoy so much.

I just think that we have put our money into things we enjoy (ie holidays) and obviously don’t have children. But I genuinely don’t find like difficult? If our washing machine breaks we buy a new one, if the car needs work we pay etc. We both saved from having full time jobs out of sixth form in order to fund out deposit (again, big bonus of being northern I know!) but our mortgage payments are easily manageable etc.

I’m not suggesting that the world has our circumstances, but a lot of my peers either earn more than me or the same and moan they can’t do anything!

AIBU to think it’s about how you prioritise life and that “cost of living” isn’t an excuse for just being poor with money?

Again, I’m not saying that a single mum in London with 5 kids has the same options or anything like that, I’m meaning in our specific situation. Lots of people moan we earn nothing but to me it feels like quite a lot!

I also see loads of people on here moaning their 100k salary doesn’t go far anymore and they’re missing out on things. If I made 100k I’d be planning to retire in about 5 years!!

https://www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/174674348?utm_campaign=property-details&utm_content=buying&utm_medium=sharing&utm_source=copytoclipboard#/&channel=RES_BUY

£100k can buy you a house.

£90k mortgage over 25 years, £500 a month
income at £3.5k a month household

you should be comfortable. You are fortunate & live within your means.

you can obviously understand why others have different income and expenses though.

on a low income, it only takes a small run of back luck, redundancy, ill health or just bad financial decisions such over stretching on a car etc to get into a debt cycle.

😂

You’ve just said it yourself though ‘not the most amazing area in the world’ - the OP said you could buy somewhere ‘nice’ but that isn’t true. You can buy somewhere poorer or more downtrodden, but to say nice is naive

I do agree with you where also up north low mortgage, minimum wage jobs and manage fine my dd has just bought her first home with her boyfriend at 19 and are both in slightly above minimum wage jobs. I also have family and friends same situation on significantly higher wages who never have money well they say they never have money but are always going on days outs, concerts, always in new outfits always have up to date tech, cars on finance which is fine but then will question why we can afford things they can't when we earn less and they don't seem to grasp we have 10plus year old car, kids aren't in multiple clubs, don't have days out every weekend, haven't been to a concert for years, I haven't bought clothes for myself in a few years. Don't spend money on coffees, nails, brows, mounjaro. All that stuff does add up and over a year can easily pay for a nice holiday

Edited because I was too harsh and it doesn’t help my point.

there are cheap enough homes, but they are not ‘nice’ as the OP stated. They are acceptable, and that is fine, but the OP is acting like you could actually get somewhere nice but you can’t, you can live somewhere poorer, more run down, more crime etc.

Middlesbrough for example is the coke capital of the uk

I’d suggest watching the news, listening to the radio and reading. Try to imagine a life that has any variable to your own and you may start to find some answers.

We have a similar income to you, have 2 children and manage reasonably well, also in the North. We do have to be aware of money but can go on holiday and can afford to save a bit so that things can be replaced as needed etc. Definitely don't feel poor.

I got divorced two years ago. I’m in my 50s and to finally feel free is priceless. I am self employed and work my ass off for a decent wage doing a job that I am lucky to enjoy.

it is clear though, that unless I become part of a couple and cohabit / marry I will find the cost is living a challenge especially with university age DC. But I’m happier than I’ve ever been so am absolutely not looking for a serious relationship. Even if I was it would be hideously unromantic and mercenary to be doing so in order to have somebody to share the cost of living with.

I appreciate that some people wouldn’t want to be single, but others like me do, and it seems a shame that many people just couldn’t manage without a partner…..

Why are you pooping on your cats???

"We have two cats (one of whom has needed very expensive vet treatment) and soil them rotten."

I’m not sure if you’re from the area, that house is basically in the back garden of a Pupil Referral Unit.

There’s absolutely nothing wrong with living in Pally Park, I know lots of people who do, all of whom are normal pleasant people. Their kids go to the mainstream secondary school that’s basically next door, and it’s just a normal northern comp. No airs or graces, but not horrendous either.

But.. I also don’t think any of them would describe the area as “nice,” which was OPs description of £100-150k houses in the North.

I strongly disagree it’s naive to say those homes are not nice just because they are not the nicest ones on sale. A nice starter home is one that’s comfortable, decently appointed and in an area with the facilities, transport links etc that you need. If you are going to insist it’s only nice if it’s in the most desirable/expensive area you’ll struggle. I work in an office full of people on £50-100k salaries in their 40s and we all happily lived places like this in our 20s and felt they were very nice homes in nice enough areas. I think the OP has the right idea to find something nice vs something ideal (which I think is what you are describing). If your circumstances change and you want to you can move though more than one of my colleagues with a household income well over £100k has opted to stay in the part of North Shields that last house is in to facilitate loads of travel/experiences and I genuinely think their homes are lovely. There is a lot of space between “not the most amazing” and “not nice”

Ok so..,
No kids
No student loans from what you have said
The North is a big place and some parts are cheaper than others (York a lot more expensive than Hull for example)
Maybe others are saving?

Hard to know. Really not sure why you are posting. It’s like a reverse of one of those ‘we earn £11K a month but are struggling’ posts …..

I’m on North West and the nice starter homes round here are around £235k and that’s if they need a bit of work to them. If I paid any less I’d be living in an area that I would not class as nice. I can’t imagine where OP is living that is so cheap.

OP - I’m on a decent wage but am still feeling the squeeze as I’m the main earner in the house, no little kids / they’ve left home - I don’t live a flash lifestyle but I like to have a warm house in winter, and eat decent food, and just feel like bills are constantly increasing. It is a struggle.

Good point. Op is on £13.70ph so over nmw

And partner on similar /over nmw

so yes joint has to be £51+

I don’t think you are being totally unreasonable.
I live in the north west, combined income about £75k (i’m on 30), if we were more frugal with food and other spending, and weren’t parents we could afford similar.
However everything to do with kids are expensive. Running 2 cars are expensive. Having a few meals out each month is expensive.
If we didn’t do these things, sure. I know people in your position who have a pretty happy life.
It’s a lot cheaper up north . You’ll have people say they can’t imagine earning less than £200k but live in a big house in Surrey, it’s different.

This. At least get the maths right for your fake goady post 🤣

Well done you. A few things to consider

• You don’t mention kids: I’ll assume you don’t have them yet. Those things are bloody expensive. 2 kids could end up taking a full salary in childcare cosrs
• you live in the north: you’ve probably not had to spend at least £500k on your home like those in London would.
• £100k is not the riches you imagine. A lot is taking off in tax, and for many, additional payments for student loans, commute and professional fees

I've never known/noticed the price of food in particular rising at the rate it is now.

An item I buy all the time in Lidl has increased by 50% in the past year. Fresh vegetables have gone up massively too.

Irrelevant to the thread. But that house is a beauty

Well, not having kids is the biggest factor tbh. If we went 50k and had no kids, then we'd feel rich! We actually earn about 90k and have two kids, and definitely don't feel rich! BUT we bought our house at a really good time so have managed to crawl our way up the property ladder and have some savings, manage nice holidays (which again are so much more with kids as you have to go when it's most expensive, and you're paying for additional flights and holiday spaces bigger rooms etc, so holidays cost a small fortune with kids. Gosh the travel we did pre kids was amazing, and sooo much cheaper!) and have spare cash for fun things, but we don't go wild. I'm certainly not complaining as we live relatively well. And seem "better off" than some friends with much bigger salaries, but also have much bigger more expensive houses, cars and everyday costs than mean they don't have much left over. We definitely prioritise travel and experiences more than material stuff, which is why we're happy in our modest terraced house, with new-ish but basic cars, and aren't fussed on the latest gadgets and tech. It's about what people prioritise, timing and a little bit of luck tbh. If we weren't fortunately in the ideal position to buy a house at the exact time prices crashed 20 odd years ago, we would have struggled to buy a few years later when prices had gone back up.

It isn't really a cost of living crisis now because it's been going on for so long. It's just a country that has a lower standard of living than it used to.
You have acclimatised better. Well done.

That's true. I had a pretty basic lifestyle in my early 20s, in thr early 1990s. Bought a two bedroom flat. Second hand furniture.. No central heating. No dishwasher. No restaurant meals

My nieces and nephews would turn up their noses at that lifestyle. But to be fair, I've don't think cutting out Netflix and avocado toast would enable them to buy a flat now

I think the point of the CoL discussions is that the average person has a lot less spending power than they would have had x years ago

My household income is almost 4x what my childhood household income was (20-30 years ago) and yet our living circumstances are in no way comparable to those of my parents around the same age.

I do agree that you can have a perfectly pleasant lifestyle around min wage if you live in the right area and aren't reckless with your money. However, people aren't wrong to point out that there's not as much left after rent, bills, groceries, and travel costs are paid - costs for these have all gone up substantially in the last 5 years in particular.

I’m in the same situation as you OP. Not earning a lot by southern standards but comfortably off. I’m very fortunate.

I live in the North of Scotland and don’t have children. Its no mystery to me that these are the reasons the COL crisis hasn’t brought ruin to my door.

You’re just being goady.

LOL nice starter home for £150k? That was what I paid for my first ‘starter home’ [a shoebox flat] exactly 30 years ago in the south. The same property is on the market for over £600k at the moment. In todays’s market, I would never have been able to find a £60k deposit and leverage a mortgage agreement for the remaining £540k on todays equivalent salary as, in fact, as a comparable job only offers double what I was paid in the late 1990s.

You have no appreciation of the CoL in the south, as well as the impact of the cost of children, childcare, loss of earnings through shortened days to top and tail school pick ups and drop offs, nor university fees/subsidising older children at uni, or a million other child related expenses.

But you know this, I am sure. A deliberately goady post.