To not understand the cost of living crisis?

[tiggerbouncy]

Fully prepared to be told I’m being tone deaf here.

Before I start I want to caveat this and say I live in the North and I am comparing to other Northerners, as I know the South is a bit of a different ball game.

I earn less than the national average salary. I have recently had my biggest ever pay rise which has put me on 25k for 35 hrs a week. My partner is on similar but has a lower hourly wage (works more hours though). In total our household income is approx 45-50k ish?

We own our home (via mortgage) and we paid for the deposit with no family help.

We go on at least one or two foreign holidays a year and frequently enjoy meals out and day trips to different places.

We have two cats (one of whom has needed very expensive vet treatment) and soil them rotten.

A lot of my peers constantly moan that the cost of living being so high is trapping them either at home with parents, renting, not being able to go on holidays etc etc. Basically, I’ve had a few comments recently about our lifestyle being really hard to achieve and how it’s unfair we enjoy so much.

I just think that we have put our money into things we enjoy (ie holidays) and obviously don’t have children. But I genuinely don’t find like difficult? If our washing machine breaks we buy a new one, if the car needs work we pay etc. We both saved from having full time jobs out of sixth form in order to fund out deposit (again, big bonus of being northern I know!) but our mortgage payments are easily manageable etc.

I’m not suggesting that the world has our circumstances, but a lot of my peers either earn more than me or the same and moan they can’t do anything!

AIBU to think it’s about how you prioritise life and that “cost of living” isn’t an excuse for just being poor with money?

Again, I’m not saying that a single mum in London with 5 kids has the same options or anything like that, I’m meaning in our specific situation. Lots of people moan we earn nothing but to me it feels like quite a lot!

I also see loads of people on here moaning their 100k salary doesn’t go far anymore and they’re missing out on things. If I made 100k I’d be planning to retire in about 5 years!!

If you’re not renting, you don’t understand - especially if you bought before the pandemic. This is mostly a cost of housing crisis.

And kids are ridiculously expensive

I do think many have an expectation of a higher higher standard of living than a basic income provides.

You are only getting a small house in a not great area with a deposit like that though!

rent on a small 3 bed terrace in Liverpool is £800-£900 if your on minimum wage that’s a large chunk of your wage gone.

when did you fix your mortgage and when’s it due? Potential of that going up £300-£400 a month!

my kids sports cost me £200 a month, our food shopping is probably £200 more than yours to feed them especially during the holidays, days out cost a fortune, a holiday is £5000

You don’t have children and you have a partner plus you live in the north. All of those things are huge things.
I have house deposits for my 2 children. I’ve given the first one his and the second one is tied up until he is old enough. So this is money I have earned but don’t have as it won’t stay with me.
I don’t have a partner (well I have a boyfriend who I don’t live with so this is not the same as halving the bills.). I Live in an expensive area.
I earn more than the 2 of you (£70,000) but get taxed more and pay a lot into my pension as a public sector worker.
So of course in your situation things will be comfortable, which is good. 2 full time workers with no children should be comfortable. You are not giving away chunks of money for house deposits etc. Also if I booked a family holiday I would pay for 3 people. You pay for 1 and presumably your partner pays for themself.
I choose to spend a lot on my children (who are 17 and 19). I have paid for driving lessons/ cars etc. So I am always skint. I think it makes sense that I am skint. I have a lodger to help me pay the mortgage.
We all make our choices and the ones you have made will mean you are comfortable financially. The choices I have made mean at the moment I’m skint currently but I’ll hopefully have a comfortable retirement.

Two salaries and no children. For a mediocrely decent life. You answered your own question.

I do get what you are saying for people who are the same position as you. I have two kids one is amazing with money and budgeting the other is awful with money. It’s like sand through his hands. My eldest lives well, but manages her money very well. She has her interest free over draft in a highly interest account.

You know nursery for one child full time costs approx 1000/pcm, right (that's with the 30 free hours!)? And that's in the north, I'd dread to think how much it would be down in that there London. I'd be absolutely loaded if I didn't have kids or all the associated costs that came with them

No kids, no student loans, live in the north.

How much did your house cost?

Well this really, having to support 2 people on 2 salaries is a bit different to having to support 3, 4 or more!

How far north are you where you’re buying a starter home with a 10k deposit. The outer Hebrides ?

I'm alright, Jack, so what's the problem is an awful attitude to take, and insensitive in the extreme. Why even feel the need to post something like this? You must be blind or live in the clouds not to see there's millions struggling desperately to make ends meet.

My mum’s house would go on the market for around £100k. My sister bought in 2022 and paid £105k for a 3 bed semi.

It’s definitely still possible in some areas of the North, particularly the NE.

I think the northern bit helps ALOT
It would be interesting to hear your outgoings

i do think not having the latest phone/expensive car bit helps too

Show us your combined income and all outgoings. Then we can decide whether you are representative of the average household.

I mean I get why people complain as cost of living has risen dramatically but you absolutely can buy a nice starter home in that budget.

These are all north east where much of my family live and it’s a pleasant enough area with decent schools/facilities.

https://www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/89112582

https://www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/91019736

https://www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/172747481

https://www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/173061260

This is near where my brother lived when starting out. Not the most amazing area in the world but it was a perfectly nice starter home with easy connections to the city centre and coast

https://www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/91404567

There are a lot less cheap houses than there used to be 10-15 years ago but you absolutely can still get something for under £150k that would be perfectly acceptable to most people as starter homes

Depends when they bought. I’m in Scotland and bought a two bed semi in a nice area with a £5k deposit but that was in 2013 (95% mortgage). I made good money on it and bought my current bigger house using the profit as part of my deposit in 2020 (70% mortgage).

I'd love to know what year you bought your house?
And did you struggle to save for a deposit whilst paying rent? Or did you have fairly reasonable rent payments?

I mean… 10% on a starter home where I am is $100k+… so that’ll do it for one… plus property taxes of $1k/month on said starter home.

childcare was $4k/month for us for 5 years because there are NO nurseries with space so it was either make the incredibly short sighted choice to get out of work or pay for a nanny (who incidentally earned a hell of a lot more than you!!). Then our DC has an awkward birthday so we effectively had a whole extra childcare year over summer borns and we’re abroad so school starts a year later.

Then its choices:

we kept DC at private school for an additional year because of slightly complex needs.

I’m not sure how much your foreign holidays are but mine are usually $5-$8k and we usually have 2-3 plus domestic holidays so probably spend close to your take home on holidays every year.

We ski, locally but still another $1-2k for the winter.

We try to buy organic and unprocessed food.

Our dishwasher broke, the new one was a $2k Miele. Could’ve chosen a cheaper one but we wanted one that would last 20 years.

We save 20% in pensions which can make monthly cash flow seem low even though we earn a lot.

You don’t have kids if I didn’t have kids I’d be saving £7k net a month

When you say you earn £25K, is that gross or net?

Because if it's gross, you're on slightly above minimum wage and your partner is on minimum wage?

“If I made 100k I’d be planning to retire in about 5 years!!”

I promise you that you wouldn’t. On a 25k salary you barely pay any tax or NI so take home the majority of what you earn - you wouldn’t take home 4x the amount on £100k.

They also say they had their biggest payrise. So either just turned 21 so min wage goes up, or increased hours.

it seems odd to that OP refers to it as a big pay rise

I was soooo loaded before I had kids! It was really easy for me to go without something just to save up for a holiday.

Now we’ve holiday clubs, lunches, food for four, school trips, school shoes, school uniforms, class photos, birthday and Christmas to name but a few - not so easy to just give up

What are you on?