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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Another weekend and another drunken DP ‘performance’

562 replies

Heatwavefry · 25/07/2026 08:13

I’ve had very broken sleep so I apologise in advance for any grammatical errors!!

There has been a trend over about a year now of DP going out once a month with friends and getting hammered, his behaviour when returning home has increasingly worsened though. We don’t live together but when he goes out he usually comes back to mine to stay for the weekend as I live centrally close to where the pubs are.

Last night, he returns about 1am and wakes me up asking if I can ‘see to him’. I say no and go back to sleep, he says he will sort himself out.

I hear loads of crashing about so am woken at least twice, and he says he’s sleeping on the sofa. After yet more noise, I go into the living room and he’s naked, there’s a massive wet patch on my sofa, which he said is because he ‘sorted himself out’ - he was still pissed at this point.

I go ballistic and tell him I want him gone first thing. He’s still on the sofa now. I am not overreacting here am I?! It’s my flat which I worked hard to afford and he treats it like this.

OP posts:
Havingaswimmoose · 27/07/2026 01:21

NoCommentingFromNowOn · 27/07/2026 01:09

@Havingaswimmoose bloody hell I remember that! She was very proud that it was an expensive restaurant, as if that meant more!

Oh, wow, thanks!
I was hoping that I had remembered correctly.

IndigoBluey · 27/07/2026 01:28

flobo3 · 26/07/2026 22:32

Op I’d just get this thread deleted now because all you’re going to get is sad individuals coming back to tell you how low your standards are etc etc etc. It’s all quite predictable and dull.

are you the sofa jizzer / wetter?

ReadingSoManyThreads · 27/07/2026 02:50

Oh dear, I'd bet money on you regretting not dumping him...that was the perfect opportunity.

There are so many better men out there, don't 'settle' for this disrespectful prick.

User565635 · 27/07/2026 04:23

Jesus Christ...
The shitbag partners that people have on here blows my mind.

daisychain01 · 27/07/2026 06:56

Every day is the perfect opportunity to dump scum like him.

daisychain01 · 27/07/2026 06:58

flobo3 · 26/07/2026 22:32

Op I’d just get this thread deleted now because all you’re going to get is sad individuals coming back to tell you how low your standards are etc etc etc. It’s all quite predictable and dull.

Apologists for vile male behaviour are predictable and dull but it doesn't stop you does it.

pag3turn3r · 27/07/2026 07:04

If he was really sorry, he wouldn't have done a half-hearted sofa clean up. He would have spent a long time cleaning it properly to show you he was sorry. The fact you had to clean it properly yourself tells me he's not sorry at all.

nutbrownhare15 · 27/07/2026 07:05

Someone said to me once you get to see what people are really like underneath when they are drunk. I would not tolerate this and would be seriously rethinking whether I want this relationship. Asking you to 'sort him out?' Just vile

flobo3 · 27/07/2026 07:22

daisychain01 · 27/07/2026 06:58

Apologists for vile male behaviour are predictable and dull but it doesn't stop you does it.

I’m not apologising for the male, he was vile. I’m wondering why grown women can’t simply step away from the thread instead of coming back to berate the op for not following their advice. People are being incredibly bitchy and unkind, why? It’s her life. Stop being so invested.

Jackiepumpkinhead · 27/07/2026 20:12

PetulaGordeno · 26/07/2026 17:14

Imagine buying the jizz sofa second hand?
I cannot understand why a woman in her 30’s, clearly has built a life for herself, would put up with this? I can understand that for all sorts of reasons women become trapped, but this woman isn’t?
She has actively chosen this man, he now really knows he can pull these stunts and get away with them.

Edited

Revolting isn’t it!

KarenNextDoor · 28/07/2026 12:25

Only just came back to this. So after all that, youve forgiven him? 😂 until next time hey…..

he booked into the pub to placate you but really so he could get a hair of the dog 🤦🏻‍♀️

All the best op

AcrossthePond55 · 29/07/2026 15:45

@Heatwavefry

Ok, that's your choice to make.

Just remember when it happens again (and it will) that there are threads on MN to support the partners/spouses of alcoholics.

I'll see you there eventually, I'm sure. And you will be very welcome and will not be judged.

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