AIBU to think children do not need packed summer schedules?

[Didhereallyleavethecountryinabetterplace]

We have finished school where we are. We live in a warm place by the beach and swimming pools and so many things to do.
A family member has signed her children up to hundreds of activities and different camps. She doesn’t really work or at least not many hours and from home, they have plenty of money and a large home and garden.
I completely understand full time working parents having to rely on camps/clubs etc. But if you don’t/didn’t have to, is there anything wrong with just letting your kids relax and be at home with you and their friends a bit?
I love mine being off, do get overwhelmed sometimes yes, but generally love it and we can find lots to do and days that we don’t do much, they can relax-watch tv, play in the garden, do crafts, go for a bike ride, swim and so on.
Why do some have to be so over scheduled, especially when they have that normally with school then clubs and homework every night
As a child, I remember loving just lolling around, seeing friends and having some days not really doing much

I don’t understand it

Sadly round me, many kids don’t do anything like the OP mentions. They just spend 6-7 weeks running around, or riding microscooters and screaming.

When working in the supermarket, they just did that inside the store. Plus mess around with toys - didn’t buy them of course!

I pray for rain as that is when the screaming is subsided

They are into sports and extra curriculars and do this year round (not every day though as too much for kids) As I said it’s a combination of staying at home, in the garden, reading, playing, baking etc, playing with friends, bike rides & dog walks & beach, pool with some days out at museums, park, playground, library. It’s all fun & relaxed and we’re together, we won’t have it for long and I’m so grateful and want to make the most of it whilst i’m able to

Are her kids safe and looked after? If yes then meh. Her kids her choice. Focus on your own.

*Year round-school time

Yes but they’re clearly exhausted and struggle at school and are far behind

So they are far behind at school because they go to summer camps?

Ok but this is not your concern. They are not going to be at school - it’s the holidays. If they are safe and looked after, your concern should end there.

For some families it isn't relaxing. I will be making sure my SEN child isn't going to be flooding the floor all the time!

Good for you. Some people like to go skiing in the winter break, some like to stay at home and read and do puzzles in front of the fire. Neither is better than the other. To each their own. Do you not understand that? Motherhood doesn’t end when your children reach adolescence or adulthood. You’ll be taking walks along the beach with them when they’re grown up, too. Instead of passing wholly offensive and unnecessary judgement on others, maybe spend a little time thinking about your own choices. It kills me every time I drop my kids off at sleepaway camp, literally sob in the car before I set off home. The house is desolate and quiet and boring when they’re gone, I feel adrift and bereft without them. But they love it, look forward to it from one summer to the next, learn vital skills, blossom and flourish with the independence and the new things they learn every year. I’d be extremely selfish keeping them home with me so I could enjoy them and “make memories”.

This is just the kind of stuff we do usually anyway though, but I guess if you don’t manage to get any of that stuff done during the school term it might be a nice chance to. For us though, we are at the library every week, we go swimming every week together, my two play outside after school for hours every day, they bike or scoot every day to get around, we are often at the park. DD1 is only at school for 6 hours a a day Monday-Thursday so there is a huge amount of time for her to do all that stuff already.

So summer holidays for us are more of a chance to do other stuff that DC can’t do during school term, like activity camps for new sports, she’s doing an outdoor science camp which she’s so excited about, craft workshops, etc.

It depends. 2 of mine need to be encouraged to be active otherwise they don't sleep at night.

I meant what ages are your kids compared to theirs.

Re: jealousy, because the word overscheduled is often used as a lazy insult for people whose kids happen to have a passion for / be really good at a sport or activity IME.

Might have been useful to mention this in the first post then, hey?

Im not sure there is a correlation though. Sports and music are shown to help with academics as they use different parts of the brain.

My son does not benefit from too much time at home. Appreciate it might be different as we are working, but he chooses lots and lots of activities year round. He doesn’t like faffing around, doesn’t do crafts or baking and just wants to be running around doing things with other kids. My daughter needs quiet time. So I meet their differing needs. No one needs to feel sad for either of them, they and we are fine.

Yes, because people who send their kids to sport send them there 24/7. They couldnt possibly have a lie in on other mornings.

Selfish?! To have your children around family and friends? Ive heard it all now, what a bizarre point of view you have, it’s why we have kids

You don't think it's selfish to keep your children around your FOR YOUR SAKE if they want to be elsewhere doing other stuff? You had children to have them around your family and friends?!

And you think I'm the one with a bizarre point of view?? Frankly, your original post makes a whole lot more sense after this. Wow.

I’m a SAHM and my kids will do a few different camps over the summer hols because they enjoy them.
they do a camp at school where they get to spend time with their friends doing sports, activities and crafts and do a gymnastics camp where they get to do gymnastics all day long (and love it)
it also means I can crack on with stuff around the house so when they are home we can do other fun things rather than waiting for me to do laundry, cleaning, etc.

you don’t have to understand it, it’s not what works for your family, but it works for them

So it’s fine for a parent who works to put their child into camp (even though they might not want to go), but not fine for a parent to choose to put their child into camp when they want to go?

weird way to think

I have something planned to do with the kids almost every day of the holidays, it's just what works for us. They start each day by asking what we are doing, finish every day by asking what we ate doing tomorrow, and bicker or complain constantly if stuck in the house too much (they can manage the odd day, but to days in a row would be too much). I run out of ideas pretty quick if I'm just winging it, so spending a few weeks booking things and writing out ideas or what's on when makes our summer run more smoothly.

That doesn't mean they don't also play, doss around and relax. The activities vary in length from 1 to maybe 5 hours, so even on days with longer activities there's still 7+ waking hours foe chilling out.

What on earth are you on about? THEIR friends….! They play with their friends in our cul de sac, we meet up with my friends whose kids are their friends too, we see our wider family-grandparents, aunties, uncles, cousins to play with, time with Dh and I..I can think of nothing better tbh!

If they really want to go yes, but what if they really want and need to relax fully for a while

Yes similar here, although not every single day. Days we don’t leave the house by car for example, we go in the pool or dog walk or bike rides around the neighbourhood. Kids will often knock on to play or vice versa

My kids get 8 weeks off over the summer, it makes for a better balance for them to have days at a holiday camp where they can spend time with friends or doing activities they enjoy while I also get a break from them and can get household chores done.

spending all day every day with each other isn’t good for us either.

My kids went to a couple of week long summer camps and participated in activities of various sorts. But they spent many hours riding bikes with their friends, building forts, getting muddy at a nearby creek, swimming in the local pool, and creating their own games with their friends. They both like to read and make art. That worked well for my family. But I had the luxury only working part time. Many kids these days are following 8 to 5 structured programmes of some sort. They don’t have much time to just goof off with their friends or to create their own fun. It’s tough on working parents to have arrange signing up for multiple supervised enjoyable summer sessions for their kids and to organize drop off and pick up at different locations. Most of those children will be fine too. I think there should be some limits on screen time in the summer, but that’s just me,