AIBU to think children do not need packed summer schedules?

[Didhereallyleavethecountryinabetterplace]

We have finished school where we are. We live in a warm place by the beach and swimming pools and so many things to do.
A family member has signed her children up to hundreds of activities and different camps. She doesn’t really work or at least not many hours and from home, they have plenty of money and a large home and garden.
I completely understand full time working parents having to rely on camps/clubs etc. But if you don’t/didn’t have to, is there anything wrong with just letting your kids relax and be at home with you and their friends a bit?
I love mine being off, do get overwhelmed sometimes yes, but generally love it and we can find lots to do and days that we don’t do much, they can relax-watch tv, play in the garden, do crafts, go for a bike ride, swim and so on.
Why do some have to be so over scheduled, especially when they have that normally with school then clubs and homework every night
As a child, I remember loving just lolling around, seeing friends and having some days not really doing much

I don’t understand it

Depends on the kids, and the adults. I find very few things more stressful than a day at home with the kids with nothing in particular to do. I do tend to keep our summers fairly scheduled. Not necessarily camps every week but plans or an outing for every day. My kids are too young to just go out with friends so we'd all be climbing the walls if we didn't have plans.

If you all frequently meet up then you know each others plans/make plans

@Didhereallyleavethecountryinabetterplace, I always remember a story my sister told me about her boss. He was driving his son to football camp, the previous week was Forest camp, when a voice from the back of car, asked, “Dad, when do I get my holiday?”

So pls remember kids need a break too, and boredom can be useful.

I think yanbu. I LOVED the 6 week break when I was a kid. We went on holiday for the first two weeks and then 4 weeks of "nothing". It was wonderful. A trip out to a museum or to see friends once a week or so but other than that........ playing in the garden, summer games and projects of our own choosing.
Scheduled activities have their place but I think kids NEED a holiday from that. Filling the school hols with activities is far too similar to being at school. Rather defeats the point of having a break from school.

Knowing each other's plans can mean knowing you don't/barely overlap. There isn't any way round the fact that some kids and adults aren't available much over summer. You do need to understand this.

I have already put in quite a few meet ups with friends of my youngest DC over summer, but we planned ahead because we knew everyone has a job and the little group all tend to be away a lot. There were still not that many days available, and there'd be even fewer if I were full time.

Aww 🥲 this is so sad and yes I agree

Not every child enjoys lolling about or chills out at home.

My eldest DD is very intense and needs a lot of exercise and stimulation or she just becomes destructive/ bickers/ incredibly untidy/ constantly wants screens and generally very hard work - she's like a working dog. She's up at the crack of dawn and by 10.30 she's climbing the walls. I generally plan something everyday - walk/ scooter / library and free library craft/ free museum and free craft/ park/ splash park/ activity day/ playdate and one big outing a week and a visit to grandparents 1 day a week. We usually do the activity around 10.30, incorporate a picnic lunch and then usually head back around 2.30. she will then be happy to chill out at home for the rest of the day.

My youngest is completely opposite, she doesn't mind a few days chilling out at home. She is happy to lay in bed a bit, laze around and generally potter about.

Exactly!

But we are similar to you, a mix of both, but not the majority of the holidays away at different camps all day

I find a mix works. The only ones round here doing camps are doing so for childcare. We are in a childcare desert here. Anyone wanting childcare for 9-5 in the summer holidays had to book one at 6am on 2nd January. We are doing a couple of sessions 10-12 and one 10-2 but that's it.

I do feel a bit sad for those whose whole holiday is camps and childcare but for some parents, needs must. Its far worse to not have food on the table or struggling financially.

Yes we just used to 'play out' in the 70s.

Completely depends on your kids. Some kids thrive on a lot of structure and high activity. You sound judgemental without much reason. Why?

Yes of course, I did say in my post that this doesn’t include those who have to put them in childcare/camp due to working full time-but this case isn’t this

My youngest ds would have hated just chilling at home during school holidays. He had mountains of energy and the days you describe didn't suit him.
Perhaps your family members dc are similar. They probably enjoy the activities/ camps.
I don't think it's something other people need to understand. Parents generally know their dc best.

Worth pointing out that just because it's not the case for a given household, doesn't mean they're not indirectly affected because friends in this position are unavailable.

Different kids thrive in different environments, I did full summer camps as a kid pretty much every summer for the full 6 weeks, I just didn’t enjoy being at home with no real plan for a couple of days, I thrived off the schedule.

I don't agree that it needs to be scheduled down to the hour. However some families do enjoy that and have the stamina for it. I'm on SSP so we can't be out here there and everywhere this holiday. However I've never had a good few weeks off in the holidays with them so I'll be trying to do as much as possible locally for free (library, splash pad, parks) most mornings before my fatigue hits in the afternoon. They are very active kids but the last week has been hard getting them up, out the door and bedtimes a nightmare. They really do need a couple of days next week not doing very much with no plans just so they can reset their nervous systems.

My kids are 14 and 9, I've not worked in the school holidays for years. The age gap is hard as the older one will just bed rot unless seeing friends, but is now old enough so I can take the younger one out to meet friends, parks etc. I plan a few outings and then the rest of the time I completely wing it! Yes there's lots of screens, asking for constant food, vbucks (which he has to earn) but there is also long lie ins, random bike rides, playing out with friends till dusk, holidays in the uk, coffee shops, and just no demands in general. Make the most of it if you can

Ewy. You touched a nerve there op! But this is middle class mumsnet where it’s a moral failing to allow a child to do nothing for 5 mins.

God forbid they might ‘laze about’ or ‘be on screens’ or be inactive in any way both physically and mentally during the long 6 week break. That won’t produce the rosy cheeked, high achieving and outdoorsy children that you might see in a Boden kids brochure or on the front of a private school prospectus. And that would be social death.

I know we're supposed to pretend everyone on MN is middle class, but some of us got much more than our fill of inactivity during long, broke childhood summers when the money ran out well before the month did.

I was replying to a previous poster on that one about using the summer holidays as a learning opportunity to entertain themselves, creating independence and resilience. That doesn't scream organising playdates and lots of wonderful days out to me. It suggests staying home and letting them figure it out with minimal parental input.

OP - your posts are dripping with judgement and I don’t understand why not everyone does things exactly like moi. Some kids like organised fun and some don’t. I was the kid who loooved clubs and organised things. Begged my parents to book me in everywhere. My own kids hate all of that so they are not doing it, except when they have to because I work.

Aw, such a shame your kids aren’t into sports and extra-curriculars the way mine are, OP! They’re missing out on so much not pursuing their interest to the highest levels. Poor
things 😢. So much life to be lived and yours are just lolling about doing nothing for weeks on end.

They’re not actually, mine couldn’t be less sporty if they tried but seeing as you’re throwing your superior parenting about, I thought I’d join in too. FWIW, mine get 12 weeks off for summer and I’m a SAHM and I send them both away to sleepaway camp for 6 weeks at a time 😱. What must you think of me, not loving me children as much as you love yours!

Mine has ADHD he doesn't like lolling

100%, my mum didn’t work & I did camps, activities but on the days I didn’t I was hardly ever at home with my mum. I was out playing with other dc on the street.