Can cake really be offensive?

[ThisWildHedgehog]

Can cake really be offensive?

So my husband bought a really nice celebration cake over the weekend. It was large, cost £20, and was absolutely delicious, but there was too much for us to eat without some going to waste.

As we were seeing my MIL, FIL and SIL, I cut the cake in half and took it round to them in the box.

My only thought was, “It’s a lovely cake, and there’s enough to share.”

When I gave it to my MIL, I said, “We’ve brought you this cake because it’s really lovely and there’s enough to share.” She replied, “That’s fine.” I thought that was a really bizarre and ungrateful response, so I said, “Well, hopefully you’ll enjoy it.” She didn’t respond to that comment at all.

Anyway, once we got home, I said to DH that I felt a bit deflated because his mum seemed so dismissive about the cake. He said, “You shouldn’t have taken it, as it’ll be taken the wrong way.”

I asked how on earth giving someone cake could be taken badly, and he said that because they’re all a bit on the larger side, it would come across as, “Fat people like cake - here’s my leftovers.” 😳

Surely not?! They’ve known me for 10 years, and we’ve often had cake together. How could that possibly be what they thought?

Gosh, I’m praying you all think I’m not being unreasonable and that there’s no way I’ve offended anyone by giving them the cake!

Exactly, how on earth is it leftovers? If I make a big roast, and there is too much I will give my son’s a portion for their Monday tea.
that isn’t leftovers, that is sensibly sharing inevitable ability to completely over cater

Why not ask the other posters who said the same as me? I don't eat food from people's houses.
HTH

What weirdos! Feel free to drop off any unused cake to me in future, OP 🎂

“Bizarre and ungrateful”? It was half of a leftover cake you didn’t want anymore.

Get over yourself. I would be binning it.

Cake is one food that isn't seen as leftovers - think party bags, slices of wedding cake sent to important guests who couldn't attend etc. What you did was kind and perfectly reasonable.

My immediate answer to the title of your thread was "only if there's something obscene piped on with icing". 🙂

“Left over cake”? You’ve lost me with that one, sorry. Can anyone explain what this is please?

Anyway, changing the subject, did you know cake freezes excellently? Slice it up, separate the slices with a layer of grease proof paper then freeze. You probably only need an hour (?) to defrost one slice.

Can't get past you buying a 16- slice cake, only to eat 2 pieces then try to give it away....what a waste of money!

I make deliberately offensive cakes quite often so yes I would say so (not really, they're meant to be funny).

However in your case, I would have seen this as a kind gesture too.

I don't like cake at all, but if someone had have brought me their fabulous cake that they didn't want to go to waste I would have accepted it as a gift with good grace, and then doled it out to people who wanted some. I certainly wouldn't have been snotty about it. They sound rude.

I struggle to see how anyone could interpret that as offensive!

As always, mn has proved an eye opener. I had no idea there are people who don't eat food prepared in other people's homes! I personally love a foodie gift!

Lots of people don’t particularly want half an eaten , slightly dry because it’s been cut already, cheap cake. That’s on them but I don’t think she needed to be excited that you brought her it.

What nonsense. You did nothing wrong OP. You were perfectly reasonable

Hard to be offended by a bit of cake.

Don’t worry, think many people are a bit hot and bothered and grumpy at mo

I have got over myself. I just asked whether I was being unreasonable. 😊

I still think it’s basic manners to say “thank you” when someone gives you something, whether it’s a bunch of bananas or half a celebration cake that was intentionally put aside for you.

You clearly disagree, which is fine.

I’m not questioning your boundaries on this. However I’m interested to know why

I don't understand it, @Naurrr what do you mean you "don't eat other people's leftovers"? It's not a reheated kebab it's a cake. You know if you go to a fancy restaurant and have a slice of torte, other customers will have had slices off the cake before you? Do you still see that as eating other people's leftovers?

I asked how on earth giving someone cake could be taken badly, and he said that because they’re all a bit on the larger side, it would come across as, “Fat people like cake - here’s my leftovers.”

He said that, did he?

Just to be clear we’d only eaten two slices at the time - we finished our half yesterday!
I was also seeing my family after my in laws so had every intention of taking it to them but last minute thought the in-laws might like it instead. We don’t often treat ourselves but this cake really was lovely.

Yeah that's a point actually.

If this is true, the OP only brought it from one place to another.

It's not like she rubbed her arse on it.

Bloody hell!

They sound crazy! I would love these kind of leftovers. And I don’t actually think it’s leftovers, it’s sharing like you said.

You did nothing wrong at all! It was a kind gesture - you’ll know to just not bother next time!

Um ok, our friend had a birthday at the weekend and 2 people baked her cakes so she brought half of one to us so it didn’t get wasted. We enjoyed our afternoon cup of tea with an unexpected and very delicious slice of chocolate cake. Wouldn’t occur to me to be offended! Utterly rediculous if anyone is

There are some very odd people in the world and quite a lot of them have posted on here.
Sharing a cake is not 'giving people leftovers" from their dinner!

They are family, not random strangers giving out cake in a bizarre fairy tale.

Do you think these posters go to weddings and turn their noses up at slices of the wedding cake? 😂 "ugh not leftovers again"

Was a lovely idea just not appreciated. Cake going spare is not the same as left overs at all in my eyes.
Try not to dwell - who knows what they were thinking but you know you meant well x

You are normal, and everyone else on here, and your in-laws, are mad.

Sharing food is a very human thing to do.

Food doesn’t have moral value, so offering cake should have no connotations in that direction, no matter how everyone here is trying to make it so.

You did a nice thing and they are weird. And your husband is an arse for pandering to it.

PS next time would you please share your delicious cake with me? I am fat and watch what I eat but I’d never offend anyone who brought me a treat because it was just a nice thing to do.

Or if they go in a cafe and there's cake slices for sale?