AIBU to find a lawyer for my nephew whose pregnant girlfriend says she doesn't want him on the birth certificate?

[Hillfarmer]

My lovely 35-year old nephew is in a very stormy relationship. He and his GF already have one DC of 18 months. She is pregnant again, due August - we could debate the rights and wrongs of that until the cows come home - but we are where we are. They have just had an almighty bust-up, she's kicked him out of the house and now telling him she won't have him on the birth certificate.

He is a devoted Dad and would be devastated not to have parental rights from the get-go, but what can he do? Are there any family lawyers on here who know whether he can force her hand in some wayl? Are there any legal means he can use before the baby is born - say, get an injunction?

He is named on the birth cerficate of his first DC and of course wants to be named on the second one's birth cert. If he's not on it, I understand that it will be much more of a fight to get access etc.

Any advice welcome!

Contraception isn’t 100% safe though, and many people are opposed to termination. Still, this was an established couple with a child already, there’s nothing to suggest this wasn’t planned.

The first half hour is normally free

I thought this too.
Hes 35! You don’t need to be involved.
I highly doubt hes as lovely as you say he is. I suspect there’s more you don’t know, or you’re a big deluded.
In any case, it’s between the two of them and it’s up to her whether she names him or not.
He can seek legal advice after the birth.

only on mumsnet

What I posted is considered in the best interest of the child, however its well known that family crts dont always work in the best interest of the child.
Its unusual for a dad to get one single 6 hour visit per week with a 3 month old especially after only a couple of visits at mums house as there would be no bond and hes essentially a stranger to the child and at 12 weeks the baby is only beginning to realise that its a separate entity to its mother. So separating such a young child from the mother without someone the baby has a bond with is actively harmful. Honestly that judge needs his head examined

I dont know who told you this but it is completely individualised to the child and their specific needs. For example, a breastfed baby under 6 months is seen differently to a 10 month old formula fed baby.

Furthermore, the relationship itself could have meant that one parent was pressured to provide rather than be a primary caregiver. Just because it made sense when you were together that dad worked 80 hours a week and so he didnt get much time with the baby, if he now wants to arrange his life to accommodate more childcare and to become a primary caregiver, courts can and do see that and decide that the child can have significant time with them. Even 50/50.

Don't mistake primary carer status for "Mum". They arent synonymous.

You dont get to isolate your child from its father, and then have a judge say that because you successfully managed to alienate the child from its father for that time and he's had to wait to take it through court, then dad gets little visitation.

You will lose your children that way.

All these women who read books like "how to be a toxic ex wife" and "keeping your kids from their daddy" need to burn them

They’re not married. So legally in UK she does not have to put any man on the birth certificate.
Only after the birth and registration of baby the father can apply to be added.
pregnant women do not usually kick out safe, loving and kind fathers. There may be more to this than you know.

Responsibility ... not rights

It’s nothing to do with you.

This relationship is clearly awful and they should separate. He should concentrate on being a good Dad, calming down and hopefully they can get on well enough that she names him on the certificate.

It's emotional abuse to alienate your child from their birth family. It could cost you any rights to see your children.

Your child has the right to a family of origin. They have no responsibility to ensure you do not misuse your power and alienate them from their birth parent. It's vile to suggest they are responsible for you cutting them off from their birth parent in revenge.

Sorry should have specified it's parental responsibility not parental rights.

Child's rights.
Parent's responsibilities.

FWIW assuming there's no abuse I do think the child has the right to a relationship with both parents.

Of course they do. If you purposely obstruct your child from access to their parent by leaving them off of the BC, then you are abusing your child. People are so caught up trying to get vengeance on a disappointing partner that they assume you are talking about the parent having rights to the child.

No, not "on Mumsnet" 🤣🤣🤣
Every solicitor I've ever used offers 1/2 free initial consultation.

course they do. They might do a case assessment to quote, an assessment isn’t legal advice. But even so, if my solicitors had given the first 30 mins free it still would cost £150 since the minimum appointment to gather the info they need is an hour.

You need to find better solicitors. 🤣🤣🤣

I’ll await your recommendation for all the high quality solicitors who do a free half an hour. Suspect most of them will be a call centre full of students

He should speak to a solicitor to get everything in place for the access and support he needs

Why? Do you need one? Just walk into your local solicitors and ask if it’s a service they offer.

I told you didn’t I that I spent £375 Friday afternoon? I reviewed every suitable firm in my large section of the county, and north London. They don’t give free time, no.

Maybe they didn't like the look of you 🙄 or your attitude.
I do that know why they didn't give you half hr free, but just because they didn't doesnt mean that other's have the same experience as you. Its not just a "mumsnet thing" however many times you say it. Although attitudes like yours, certainly appear more common on here than in real life.
I won't be responding again, I have better things to do with my time, than arguing with people trolling. Have a good day.

I'm really surprised at the overwhelming support of weaponising a child like this because they've had a row. Pregnant or not, that's indefensible behaviour.