to not want the huge pile of girl baby clothes generously donated by dh's colleague?

[ruthosaurus]

What a nasty, shallow heel of a woman I am - DH's colleague gives us 3 bags and a box for our unborn child (20 weeks today) and it makes me cry because they're so awful...

It's just that I'm not really into pink/Disney/slogans like "if you think I'm cute you should see my daddy" and tbh most of the stuff is worn, bobbly, stained or all 3. Also, I thought you weren't supposed to give kids second-hand shoes (unless actually pretty much unworn)?

DH is a v frugal Yorkshireman, bless him, so has coaxed me into sorting through and keeping some (like, a bin-liner full), before we return the rest so she can ebay it, but I don't LIKE the stuff we chose and feel bad for not letting her just ebay the bloody lot. Being guilt-wracked by all angles of this situation, I have written her a card thanking her for her gift.

He feels that we'd be daft to waste money on new stuff and that this is a gift from heaven.

I feel that I don't want to put my baby into worn-out, pink stuff with bloody Tigger all over it and that there is a faint possibility that relatives may give the baby clothing gifts as well.

We do already have a second hand baby alarm and car-boot high chair, and my mate is selling us a v cheap cot, and I'm wearing a maternity dress I bought on ebay - it's just these particular second hand things I don't like.

Plus, we don't even know we're having a girl. Not that it matters to a newborn baby, but I'm sure the bairn will, if a boy, just LOVE seeing photos of him wearing a "mummy's little princess" sleepsuit in years to come.

AIBU?

Weegiemum, I would have hated to have looked at my wee nb ds each time and been irritated by some awful clothes he was wearing and be then swamped by guilt for feeling that way. For a number of months I had bonding issues, due to an traumatic delivery/medical problems after, followed by mild pnd and make no apology for the superficial nature of this, but part of making him 'mine' and all the lovely feelings that come with that, was the pleasure in seeing him dressed in the clothes I chose for him.

As I posted earlier, I use 2nd hand clothes for my dcs, but I can perfectly understand not wanting to use very worn clothes that aren't to your taste i.e. pink and glittery, for a pfb.

The shabby ones YANBU.
The not liking ones I would keep. If your baby is anything like dd1 was, puking every five minutes they are handy for in the house for spares. Just don't wear them out iyswim.
Obviously stained/bobbled ones I would give back.
Babies don't care what they are wearing For the amount they cost and the life span you get from the clothes it ain't worth buying new ones! BTW if its a girl I have lots of next/mackay 0-3 and 3-6 clothes, slogan free going cheap!!!!! DD2 is 13wks and just gone into 6-9mth clothes!

PS the 0-3clothes were all brand new because I gave dd1 0-3 to a colleague of DH

You have got 20 weeks, to accidently put this black sack out with the rubbish

When I was pg with DS1, DH's work colleague gave us lots of stuff including a little baby chair.

I got terribly upset about it because no matter how I scrubbed it I couldn't get the stains of the fabric and eventually I got rid of it before DS1 was born.

Looking back now (having had three DSs and having been up to the ankles in human excrement more times than I care to remember) I think, blimey, what a prime case of PFB syndrom that was. But it was very real to me at the time!

So don't beat yourself up about it. YANBU.

Absolutely agree with the last post. For DD1 everything was brand new LOL. DD2 is wearing cast offs from everyone With number 2 its different. With number 1 you worry about every possible bug etc.LOL

I had a thought - if you are going to antenatal classes and there's stuff that is good quality but not to your taste, why not offer it around and see if anyone else wants it?