To call off girl’s holiday on the day?

[whereismyhisband]

I’m due to go on a girl’s holiday for a week with a friend, an all inclusive to Cape Verde.

This friend had warned me that she’s somewhat of an anxious traveller, but that it would be fine.

Our flight is at 4:45pm. Our airline has said be there a maximum of three hours early.

The airport is half an hour from my house and my job is 15 minutes in the other direction from my job.

I am working until 12, so that I only needed to take a half day of leave.

She has been texting me since 6am asking if I’m sure I want to work today, and asking if we should leave for the airport at 10! I can’t deal with this today, I have a lot to do before I finish at work and don’t see the need for it. I’ve never traveled with her before and to be honest if I’d known she was like this I’d not have booked it. AIBU to just not go?

Not now, maybe tomorrow, try and talk about her unreasonable behaviour.

At the moment, you are pissed off and it probably wouldn't land right if you were to say something now.

There's feeling a bit nervous vs hundreds of texts plus numerous phone calls - she does sound like she needs therapy, maybe CBT would be helpful.

I’m glad you decided to go, @whereismyhisband - it would have been a shame to miss a holiday.

Has your friend calmed down, now you are in Departures well ahead of time?

You’re a delight.

It would be an absolutely horrible thing to do to cancel on the day , not only that you could be doing YOURSELF out of a fantastic time . the girl is anxious & wound up . If she gets on your nerves when travelling go & have a glass of wine , put your ear pods in & relax .

Oh god are people still actually believing this is real. She left work, got home, showered, to the airport, through baggage and then security in 50 mins. I'm afraid she wont be able to talk to her imaginary friend about how unreasonable she is for sending 100 imaginary texts 😂

I once went on a flight to Dublin on one of those tiny Dane Dare planes.

They had thoughtfully put out a free newspaper and on the front page...a big photo of an airplane crash!

Tell her you can't get out of work in the morning

That’s the impression I get too. There seems to be very little empathy for the anxiety friend is obviously feeling. A reassuring ‘you go to the airport whenever you like, I’ll text when I finish work and am on my way’ is really all that’s needed.

Annoyed by friend messaging but had time to comment on here 32 times 😂

Works been and done… at the airport now!

Surely this type of behaviour would’ve been spotted before? If you’re close enough to be holidaying together?

This. It’s not anyone’s job to answer the same questions over and over again, to satisfy someone else’s anxiety. If she’s anxious, she goes early. Nobody should never be expecting people to change their behaviour to satisfy their anxiety. Work on the anxiety, don’t put your ridiculous asks on everyone else.

They're already in Cabo Verde and she's by the pool.

Stop being so mardy - you’re off on holiday (and a lot of people can’t for whatever reason) so stop with the whinging and choose to have a good time.

🤣

This

😂

Well that was a load of shite.

You do sound quite mean about your friend. As annoying as it is she clearly is distressed.

next perhaps advise her to get some meds to help her calm a little. Can you get anything abroad for the trip back from a pharmacy.

did You get your work done though - I can see the number of posts!!

Goodness knows how the holiday will go with these two! 😂🫣

Anxiety disorders are real
it’s more than being stressed
this woman clearly has an anxiety disorder related to travel
OP’s approach will not help, it will make the woman feel more out of control and unsafe
I’m not saying that reassurance and moddycoddling is helpful -
but an empathic, supportive stance would be good -
the woman / people with anxiety disorders cannot just switch it off / pull themselves together because the people around them are pisssd off
usually the person with the anxiety disorder is the most pissed off at the hassle /
distress of living like that -
she needs therapy / maybe medication
and some TLC -
OP - anxiety disorders can be really distressing and severe and incapacitating -
just be a decent person - she can’t help it

This is above kindness and yes, what OPs friend was doing would take too much from me.

that doesn’t mean I should be banned from travelling with others as you suggested 😂

Yeah...hope you cancelled. You don't sound suitable and calm as a travel companion. It would be better fir your friend

You really are coming across horrible. Im sure she sent you over 100 messages from 6am - 9am 🤦‍♀️
The fact that you didnt even get the flight times right shows why shes extra stressed.
In fact I cant even believe this is real....

By all means stick to your guns about arrival time but be kind and understanding to her anxiety!!! You were fond enough of her to book a holiday with her after all!

You might as well have taken the morning off, you have not been very productive!