How can I divide my estate fairly between daughters and grandchildren?

[Ilikesundays]

Would really appreciate your views! I’m in my 80s and have three dds and 7 gcs. All are over 20. Two dds are married: one has 3 DCs and one has 4. Youngest dd is unmarried and has no children. I want to make my will and be fair to all of them. I was thinking of leaving all my property (f/h house, no mortgage in London + fairly substantial savings) to the gcs + the unmarried dd and nothing to the two married DDs. But on reflection this seems very harsh and unfair to them . How would you manage it? They are all working, bar two gcs who are still studying p/g.

Split equally between your three daughters. They can give some to the GC if they wish. I can’t see it would be fair to leave two of your daughters nothing.

Equal amounts to all three daughters.

It is highly likely your unmarried daughter will leave everything to her sisters children.

Do NOT sour relations between them by doing anything other than a third each.

It causes upset that is then your legacy.

Divide equally between your 3 children. How they then provide for their own children should be up to them.
All children should always have an equal share regardless of their situation.

This! Your daughters should get equal shares. Their children, if they choose to have more or fewer should be irrelevant in a way. If they have more children then their children get less but that is not on you!

you should do whatever you think - I’d be happy if I got no inheritance from my parents, if it means they enjoyed their retirement to the maximum.
having said that…
My mum is one of four; as of this year her last remaining sibling died. My grandma is 98 (and still going strong). My grandma has changed her will (with my mum’s blessing) so that us 10 grandchildren will get 1/10th of her estate each. You could argue that the grandchildren with less siblings are getting a raw deal.

Evenly between the 3 daughters, they then decide how/if they want to share with their children. Each of your daughters made their own life choices that have gotten them to where they are now, if that means that ultimately one ends up splitting it into lots of smaller pieces then that’s a decision they made, not one you factor in for.

or their husband cheated on them and took half the house in a divorce.

situation vary between families, but the reckless one would still have the greatest actual need.

I have one daughter who I could throw under a bus in a heartbeat knowing that she will always bounce back, she does not need anything from me as she will always succeed regardless of what I do, but her sisters are another story.

is it fair that I give an equal share to someone who would just consider it to be another tax bill to pay when there is someone to who it could make a real difference?

the key thing is to tell everyone ahead of time so that there are no big shocks.

Only you can decide, BUT if it were me making this decision I would divide my estate equally between my three children. Doing it the way you proposed is terribly unfair and a kick in the teeth to your childless daughter 😓
Plus, your grandchildren will no doubt inherit from their parents in any case one day. so it seems doubly unfair!
Your original idea seems sure to create division and resentment among your own children 😓

Divide equally between your 3 dc what they choose to give their children is then up to them this is what my parents are doing.
My brother owns his home and has 1 child i rent and have more children than him splitting equally between us is fair .

Splitting it 10 ways is treating them equally. Adult GC inheriting has no impact on the DC.

Splitting it equally between your children is always the fairest.

Its then up to your daughters if they want to give some to their own children.

Your DD without children can do what she chooses with it, and may leave money in her will to nieces and nephews one day.

My grandparents had 5 kids and left their estate equally between all 5 of them despite massive differences in salaries, but it was fair.

A good plan, I don't see why the married children should be penalised for being married as the OP's original plan intended.

Only divide between your 3 daughters. They can decide if they gift any money to their children and if your daughter who doesn’t have children’s ends up with them in the future she can do the same.

I would leave the money to the 3 children. If you want to do something like give each GC a sum (e.g. £10k) do that, but don't do any more. My DF would like to give the remains of his estate to my Dsis and I, but adjusted for my 3 DC and her 2 DC, so 2/5 for her and 3/5 to me. We are both uncomfortable with that for a variety of reasons.

As someone who got nothing from grandparents (it went to their children - my uncle split his with my cousins, my mum wasn’t in the same financial way and spent hers on clearing debts and living costs) I would suggest a cash sum to each grandchild and then split equally between daughters. What they do with it is then up to them (eg they might clear mortgage and then the grandchildren would benefit at a later stage)

I would without doubt split it between your three daughters.
Anything else and you will create bad feeling and division between your family that will never be resolved.
That is the only fair way.

Token gift to each grandchild of say £250 then the rest is split equally between the three children. It's the only fair way.

Three children, treat them equally and they each get a third of the bulk of the estate. You can always do a cash gift for each GC. They will later inherit from.tjeor parents.

I remember my grandad saying to my mum, 'I'll look after my children, then when the.times comes, you look after yours' (with respect to wills and inheritances).

Ultimately, it really is is up to you, but I think adding the next generation to the main estate distorts matters. As does overthinking things about who needs more etc. Circumstances change and you can't second guess. Keep it simple and divide by 3 and tell your daughters so they know what to expect.

How strange. The fairest thing is to leave each daughter an equal share and then a gift amount to each grand child.
Your children come first and grandchildren come second surely.

Your division seems odd and incredibly unfair to me. You chose to have 3 children and barring relationship breakdowns which you haven’t mentioned, these three children are your direct heirs. The responsibility for providing for your grandchildren belongs to their parents and their parents alone. Unless you are looking to create divisions and resentment once you are gone, your estate should be equally divided between your three children.
if you wish to leave small keepsakes to the GC that’s something else, but the main estate should go three ways only, that’s the only fair division.

No. Don't do this

Split 3 ways between your daughters, or leave a small amount to your grandkids

Adding your grandkids to an equal share introduces all sorts of resentment

YOUR kids are your heirs

Leave their kids to them

My DGPs divided equally between DC. DGC didn't get anything.

Leave it equally to you 3 daughters. They will in time pass on to their children. Anything else will cause resentment when you are gone and feels unfair on the childless daughter - which would be a shame.
If you really do want to do something for your grandchildren, then leave a small cash gift.

Personally, I would give a set amount to each grandchild (whatever you can afford) then leave the remaining bulk equally between the three daughters.

Of course it does. One DD will get only a tenth of the inheritance whereas family of DD with four children will get half of it. That is not fair, and I’d be pretty miffed if I was DD with no children and my mum did that to me.