How can I divide my estate fairly between daughters and grandchildren?

[Ilikesundays]

Would really appreciate your views! I’m in my 80s and have three dds and 7 gcs. All are over 20. Two dds are married: one has 3 DCs and one has 4. Youngest dd is unmarried and has no children. I want to make my will and be fair to all of them. I was thinking of leaving all my property (f/h house, no mortgage in London + fairly substantial savings) to the gcs + the unmarried dd and nothing to the two married DDs. But on reflection this seems very harsh and unfair to them . How would you manage it? They are all working, bar two gcs who are still studying p/g.

Well that’s life isn’t it? OP hasn’t said she doesn’t trust her daughters to look out for their children. If she had reason (one of her daughters was seriously irresponsible with money for example) she could pass her third directly to the GC instead. Some posters were suggesting dividing into 10. Personally I don’t think this is fair. Dividing into quarters with a quarter going to the GCs is the next fairest option. But obviously it’s completely up to OP.

I would leave everything equally to the 3 DDs. If you do decide to include grandchildren, an equal share to each of them.

I would leave a certain amount to each grandchild then split the rest between the three daughters

Do what my late relative did, which was to leave their estate equally between their three children. The number of grandchildren was not taken into consideration.

Unless you need to make provision for someone who would need ongoing care and financial support through their lifetime (severe disability etc), then anything else is going to cause irreparable damage to family relationships, because it will be perceived as unfair.

This.

A smallish gift amount to each gc.
Then the rest is split equally between the 3 daughters.

In this case I would ask the 2 DDs if that would upset them or if they think it would be well managed for tax.

another option is 1/3 dd, then 1/3 between each of the other 2 DDs and their dc. So 1/12 each to the dd and her 3 dcs, and 1/15 each to the dd and her 4 dcs.

This is how my grandparents have done it. 3 children get a quarter each and third quarter divided between 5 grandchildren. Since my mum has passed away her share is then divided between my sibling and I.
Seems fair and then if the married parents want to they can pass their share onto their children.

I would do quarters.

1/3 each to all the children and 1/4 between the grandchildren. It doesn't matter if more grandchildren come along if you nominate the 1/4 as a class rather than named they will be included.

That way all their lives are enriched by you and it doesn't create an imbalance if the better off child gives gifts to their children and the less well off child doesn't. It's what I want my mother to do so much child directly inherits when young enough to help her get on the housing ladder.

Split equally between your children. They decide what goes to the next generation.

Please leave it equally to all of your children and allow them to pass on as they see fit. This is the only way that seems fair. In a society that often treats child free or smaller families like they are “less than,” any other split risks reinforcing this stigma.

Divide equally between the 3 daughters.

Couldn't you give your 3 daughters each a sum of money now and get the pleasure from that then leave the rest of money and assets in your will, shared out between them all, then everone's happy.

Purely personal view but IIWY I would divide it equally between your three DDs.

Then the grandchildren share is split between more, that is all.

Divide equally between your 3 children. Then they can pass onto their children as they see fit.

If you divide it in 4 that’d be quarters, not thirds!

Leaving to grandchildren is more complicated. I'd just divide 3 ways to the daughters. They can then decide if and how they share with their kids.

I would divide equally between your children and give a set small amount to the grandchildren. The grandchildren will be provided for by their own parents. The marital status of your daughters should be irrelevant.

The money and assets can’t be reallocated once already divided out.

I would start with the premise that you’ll divide it equally between your three daughters. However I’d then discuss with the two with children if they’d prefer it went straight to the GC and go with their wishes on that.

eg my parents are leaving “my share” directly to my DC at my request.

However the daughters could also vary the will to achieve the same if they’re aware of this option.

@Ilikesundays

Sounds like you have a very large estate and likely a significant amount of IHT will be owed, so set some aside to allow this to be paid off. HMRC will want the money even if the house is not sold or going through probate so it maybe hard to gather enough cash to pay the tax. You may have already planned for this.

Re: split - I would give to all 3 daughters equally. Who knows what life holds from them.
Perhaps give a smaller amount to each grandchild e.g £10k or whatever seems a small but significant sum relative to your estate.

This Is so difficult to decide what is fair. You could leave your whole estate equally between your 3 daughters as this seems a very straightforward option. I do worry though that with having daughters, if they died after you then it’s more likely their spouse would remarry and all your daughter’s inheritance go to the new wife and her children. Very unlikely to happen if you had sons that died after you.
It’s likely that your unmarried and childless daughter would then leave her estate to her nieces and nephews.

I read your update which says that you are planning to leave it equally to your daughters, which I think is right and fair. You could also add a clause that if a daughter pre-deceases you then their share goes directly to their children in equal shares.

I would do exactly as you are planning.

It's your estate to leave as you wish.

If your childless DD is not financially well off at all then you could consider dividing all into ninths, leaving her 2/9ths. You are very generous.
Speak to your lawyer and make sure your Will is water tight.