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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To feel sad about this?

831 replies

justalittlesad · 27/06/2026 14:59

I’m in my 20s and live at home. I don’t earn a ton, but what I do earn goes into savings for a house.

My brother has just announced he’s leaving to Australia in September. My parents have gleefully announced that they will be travelling down to see him at Christmas.

We have no other family - it’s the four of us, my grandparents are dead and I am not particularly close with my aunts and uncles.

I can’t afford the airfare down to Australia. They’re talking about taking most of December and January down there. I can’t afford a hotel for that long, nor do I have the annual leave for it. When I asked what about me at Christmas, they shrugged their shoulders.

They’re looking at business or first class flights, but even the cheapest flights with 2 layovers are £1,400, which is basically my entire monthly salary.

I do understand it’s their choice, they’re adults and he’s an adult and it’s his decision to move. But AIBU to feel very sad at the thought of Christmas alone? I work up to December 24th and go back in between Christmas and new year, so it really will just be me. I’m really upset by it, because Christmas has always been my favourite time of year because of the family aspect.

AIBU? I feel like if I say anything I’ll be called selfish.

OP posts:
MummyMIH · 02/07/2026 23:07

Moonnstarz · 27/06/2026 23:11

Do you have adult children? What happens if one has a partner and a child and wants you to spend Christmas with them but they live a long way away, but you have another child who lives alone. Will you always prioritise the child who is in their own and hope that maybe they will find someone or choose to do something with friends one year so you get to spend Christmas with your other child and their family?

I think as adults it becomes difficult unless everyone remains near their parental home along with any partners and their family also living in the same town.

I’d expect that my child who wants me to come and spend Christmas with them would also invite their sibling.
I don’t think it matters where people live, lots of people travel to spend time with loved ones at Christmas time.

OnMidnightsLikeThis · 03/07/2026 19:50

justalittlesad · 27/06/2026 19:45

I didn’t know real trees came in parts

Do you not understand that you can stand on a chair or ladder? You do seem a bit dim….

ALovelyPinkUnicorn · 03/07/2026 20:26

MummyMIH · 02/07/2026 23:07

I’d expect that my child who wants me to come and spend Christmas with them would also invite their sibling.
I don’t think it matters where people live, lots of people travel to spend time with loved ones at Christmas time.

She is invited, just doesn’t want to pay or take leave.. so if she’s not going her parents shouldn’t either apparently?

hereforthelolz · 04/07/2026 12:58

MummyMIH · 02/07/2026 23:07

I’d expect that my child who wants me to come and spend Christmas with them would also invite their sibling.
I don’t think it matters where people live, lots of people travel to spend time with loved ones at Christmas time.

She can go. She’s made a choice not to.

UhOhRatPoo · 04/07/2026 14:40

hereforthelolz · 04/07/2026 12:58

She can go. She’s made a choice not to.

Not true. She doesn’t have enough annual leave.

hereforthelolz · 05/07/2026 21:32

UhOhRatPoo · 04/07/2026 14:40

Not true. She doesn’t have enough annual leave.

She could ask her employer if she could take some unpaid leave. I've never met an employer who has said no with enough notice.

OP said she has 8 days, which coupled with weekends and bank holidays - is a decent enough amount of time.

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