to ask my neighbour to bring her laundry in?

[Lookingback01]

I've name changed for this because I feel a bit silly to be posting, but it's driving me crazy so I need some advice.

We live in a new build next door to another couple who recently moved in. Our gardens are pretty close together and only really separated by a small fence that we can easily see over when standing.

We're all mid-thirties and they're a nice enough couple, are polite and friendly, keep themselves to themselves and are pretty quiet, so no problems there.

The issue I'm having is that the woman is objectively beautiful, very toned, slim, etc. Today she's obviously taking full advantage of the lovely weather we're having here and has decided to hang her underwear out on the line to dry. When I say underwear, I'm not talking about the simple black briefs and maternity bras that I'm currently wearing, but beautiful skimpy Victoria's Secret type stuff.

I don't know if it's my hormones or what the issue is, but this is making me feel so jealous because I keep thinking that my DH is looking at her underwear and will start to fancy her, if he doesn't already.

I was thinking that I could write her a small, friendly note just asking if she would mind bringing them inside. I mean, they're so skimpy that they'll probably be dry by now, anyway. I don't have the nerve to ask her face to face because part of me knows I'm being ridiculous, but I can't help how I feel and have been sitting here crying all afternoon imagining her and my DH together.

He thinks I'm acting crazy and said that if I send her a note, he will go to his mum's for the night because it would be absolutely mortifying.

AIBU?

You are doolally.

🛸wheeeeee

No, you can't tell anyone what they can hang out.

YABU and batshit

Don’t do it! Your husband’s right, you’re going to sound bat shit crazy and a 6ft fence might soon appear.

If you’re coveting VS underwear then just order some nice VS underwear for yourself

Pregnancy is a crazy time but I think you know you can’t ask your neighbour this

Crying all afternoon?! You sound bonkers.
Your poor husband. 😂

What am I reading?! Hell no, of course you can’t, she’ll think you’re quite mad!

I can't help how I feel and have been sitting here crying all afternoon imagining her and my DH together.

Did you ever have irrational and paranoid thoughts like this before you were pregnant?

If so, you need to see your GP. You need help.

I’m 36 weeks pregnant in 32 degree heat and I think it’s borderline offensive to use either of those things as an excuse for this sort of thinking. Hope for your sake this is a wind up because this sounds far more than hormones!

Oh no, you can’t do this. You will sound bananas. I’ve never had kids so forgive me if I’m way off base but could the pregnancy hormones be making you feel like this?

Get a taller fence.

Tbf it’s a bit grim hanging out skimpy underwear on the line lol! I always hang my washing in such a way that our undies are concealed !

Do you think you need to look after your mental health a bit more, build up your self-esteem, relax, get support from GP, friends or a counsellor? It's not right that you feel like this about your neighbour's washing and it's spoiling your pregnancy.

You’re almost there. Now realise that these are your problems, and not your neighbours, and it is not her job to solve them for you. It is your job to own your feelings and deal with them like an adult. And that might involve therapy. But it definitely doesn’t involve your neighbour shame drying her clothes.

Your hormones and the heat must be getting to you. Please don’t do anything. These people are your neighbours. You’ll embarrass yourself and your DH and have to live beside them for years!
Have a cold shower and an ice cold drink.

If some muscly man lived next door and hung his crotchless pants on the line would it make you fancy him? Of course not.

I do have some sympathy as in my second pregnancy my hormones made me think my husband fancied everyone but me. I’ve never felt like it before or since and am not insecure at all. But for some reason for a few months when I was pregnant the jealousy was overpowering.

This will pass and one day you’ll be mortified at having posted this or even thought it!

Hi it's me! The sexy skimpy underwear neighbour. Please send your husband over pronto!

Oh, another random post about women's underwear. Must be in the air this month.

Please don’t do this. It’s your hormones making you crazy and you will be mortified afterwards and she will think you are nuts/weird.

Ah, I was going to say "are you pregnant". I can't believe someone said hanging your undies out is grim! How ridiculous..I wore skimpy undies when I was pregnant. I couldn't stand maternity stuff. I just used bigger bras when breastfeeding.

Are you newly postpartum? I see that you are pregnant and as such this makes a little more sense. It's ok to feel jealous but it is your responsibility to handle those feelings and acknowledge them for what they are.

You may think she's all that but she's just another person on planet earth living her life. Leave her live hers and you live yours. Your DH is with you and not her, for a reason.

I’ve read some wild posts today but this wins, don’t do this just for your own sake she will probably just laugh at you.
it’s rubbish being pregnant and not feeling yourself but it won’t be forever & it isn’t your neighbours problem
once your upto it postpartum get your body in good shape and go underwear shopping

Writing this from my house in Spain.

You will have the last laugh OP. The strong sun will fade her colours. My washing is hanging out inside out and in the shade.

If he is doing that you have a DH problem not a neighbours knickers one

It's tricky being pregnant in this heat, but I can't believe anyone voted for this being a reasonable thing to do 😂I'm sure your husband loves you and you're growing a BABY. That's pretty badass xxx