to ask my neighbour to bring her laundry in?

[Lookingback01]

I've name changed for this because I feel a bit silly to be posting, but it's driving me crazy so I need some advice.

We live in a new build next door to another couple who recently moved in. Our gardens are pretty close together and only really separated by a small fence that we can easily see over when standing.

We're all mid-thirties and they're a nice enough couple, are polite and friendly, keep themselves to themselves and are pretty quiet, so no problems there.

The issue I'm having is that the woman is objectively beautiful, very toned, slim, etc. Today she's obviously taking full advantage of the lovely weather we're having here and has decided to hang her underwear out on the line to dry. When I say underwear, I'm not talking about the simple black briefs and maternity bras that I'm currently wearing, but beautiful skimpy Victoria's Secret type stuff.

I don't know if it's my hormones or what the issue is, but this is making me feel so jealous because I keep thinking that my DH is looking at her underwear and will start to fancy her, if he doesn't already.

I was thinking that I could write her a small, friendly note just asking if she would mind bringing them inside. I mean, they're so skimpy that they'll probably be dry by now, anyway. I don't have the nerve to ask her face to face because part of me knows I'm being ridiculous, but I can't help how I feel and have been sitting here crying all afternoon imagining her and my DH together.

He thinks I'm acting crazy and said that if I send her a note, he will go to his mum's for the night because it would be absolutely mortifying.

AIBU?

You just can't 🙈

She will think you are batshit. You should look into a higher fence or some extra panelling so you can't see through the fence. It is likely just hormones but if you suffer from low self esteem I would take steps to work on that.

This is one of the most unhinged things I’ve read on mumsnet.

In the 70s/80s Pippa Dee parties were popular and the neighbours would usually be invited round, meaning that about 4 women living in close proximity would end up with the same jumper. I remember finding it hysterical that my mum would check next door didn’t have hers on the line before she hung hers out, because the neighbour’s was a smaller size 😂 I grew up in a council scheme so houses were pretty close together.

OP I’m sorry you’re feeling like this, but you have no reason to be jealous. You’re more likely to damage your relationship by making out he can’t control himself over next door’s knickers

I haven't read the full thread.
At first I though this might be rage bait and I was going to reply - STAY IN YOUR LANE! 😆

But I read your replies and I remember how hard it was being pregnant and feeling all kinds of mixed emotions. 🫂

So the only thing I can add is;

1. Please DON'T speak to your neighbour 🙅‍♀️
2. Please buy nicer underwear for yourself 👙
3. Please invest in buying /building/erecting a taller fence to enable privacy! 🪵

I hope you feel better soon @Lookingback01 💕

Have you asked her yet @Lookingback01 ?

My previous neighbour’s wife hung out his very large unfashionable briefs . I would love to have suggested they hang those items out of my line of sight . It really spoilt the view !

There is really no depths of batshittery that mumsnet will not sink to
Dear god

Absolutely not. A whole other level of crazy.

How would you feel if she asked you to take your maternity bra off your washing line because they offended her? You never know what is going on for people maybe she is jealous of your situation....

You are hot and hormonal. You are not being g rational ATM. Promise to buy yourself some new sexy underwear after baby is born.

Replace your fence and your knickers.

Yes you're being batshit , totally, totally batshit but what I can't fathom is you drawing his attention to them on the line and telling him about it, you're literally putting the idea in his mind to think about her in the underwear 😂

You can always tell when the schools are off. Bang on time as well.

You've got to take a more philosophical attitude.
My washing line is near the next door neighbour's wall which as well as being quite high is a popular spot for the local cats to chill out on.
They often fall asleep and I like to think that if they were to fall off and wake up mid fall they'd be able to use my knickers as a parachute.
I see my neighbour's super skimpy sexy size 8 undies and think 'Hmm. You won't be saving Tiddles' like I am and I feel all superior.
You should try it.

OP I wouldn't want to see my neighbours skimpy underwear on the line either but for other reasons, and i would not hang mine up for neighbours to see. You need to get an older male relative to come over make an orqward comment to her about how nice they are and where she gets them from, that should stop her (or get a higher fence) I don't think you can write a note.

Contact the local diocese.

This is bordering on abusive behaviour from you and I get tired of the hormones excuse. It reminds me of that tv show years ago about that woman who wouldn't let her husband look at or talk to other women because she was so jealous. It should have very much stayed an inside thought.

So I wasn't imagining it when women coldshouldered me or acted like they hated me in my skinny, lingerie-wearing youth.

I hope the neighbour buys a deck chair, a jacuzzi, and a trampoline.

Zero sympathy for haters.

The schools are not off. Not in England and Wales anyway.

And what if they were? Why would children be posting on Mumsnet?

Why do people always make this ludicrous comment? That if a daft thread is posted it must be schoolkids?

If RC, that won't help, as sex within marriage is a good, and the beauty of embodied creation a cause of rejoicing.

I agree OP could do with pastoral support or counselling.

Yeah, they will probably enjoy looking at the hot neighbour.

Or would she be too old?

...enlist men to harass her into shame? Fuck that

For all we know, she is an Anglican ordinand. Some young clergy are VERY fit.

Well the schools are all out early. They need to practice their essay writing