Feeling uncomfortable after sharing a seat with a very obese passenger

[Bayleaftree63]

On public transport earlier. A very large woman sits nexts to me. She couldn’t get the seat belt
round her. Her body spilt over into my seat, leaving me squashed with what little space there was left.

On the journey I couldn’t help be annoyed at the lack of space I was left with and questioning how do people let themselves get to that size. Talking morbidly obese, not just larger - whatever the medical
term.

This isn’t about shaming, more I’m in disbelief people being that big are happy? Why wouldn’t you want to loose some weight for a healthier lifestyle.

I love the fat bashing on here. It’s just peak Mumsnet

Not everyone can afford two seats. Maybe they should make the seats bigger and accept less profit.

😂

Another Mumsnet post if things that never happened!

I was coming to say this, in case the op is genuinely curious and not just shaming. Some studies say around 50% of obese people have experienced CSA - difficult to accurately quantify but when you think about this it is easy to find compassion.

Come off it, internal flights are not public transport.

I’m surprised at the amount of people attacking OP for truthfully describing an uncomfortable experience she had.
I imagine that anyone who has paid for a seat but finds themselves squashed against a large stranger, instead of being able to use the whole seat comfortably, would feel annoyed.
I have family members who are large and I feel great empathy towards them, but I can also empathise with OP.

No doubt it is uncomfortable. It is uncomfortable being obese too. No issue with OP stating she was uncomfortable.

It's the faux naivety about how people become obese and the assumption that it is based on happiness or even simply to inconvenience others that is the rather silly part.

On the journey I couldn’t help be annoyed at the lack of space I was left with and questioning how do people let themselves get to that size.

Must admit, I am left questioning how people get to adulthood without knowing the difference between "loose" and "lose". I wouldn't have commented on it, but you seem to have made it open season for discussing people's limitations.

… is it?

Is anyone else getting this "large enough for 2" chair ad on this thread? 😃
Bit rude, algorithm

@DearZebra it’s the faux naivety of the “how can she be happy?” and “how did she let herself get that way?” questions that I think people have the issue with. As if it’s not obvious with a teeny tiny bit of thought, empathy etc etc.

Pic

It was the asking how someone can let themselves get fat is what OP is getting grief for.

There are buses in Aylesbury that have seat belts

I do think OP has a point. Yes, obesity is often a complex medical condition rather than a lifestyle choice, but equally, it's not the OP's fault that this other passenger was suffering from that condition. If I had paid for a seat on a plane/train/bus and the person sat next to me kept hacking up phlegm and swallowing it, or screaming at the top of their lungs for the duration of the journey, I'd be pretty disgruntled too - even though both of those are equally likely to be due to medical issues. They're still unpleasant to be next to.
Having a medical condition doesn't mean that your rights trump everybody else's or that everybody else is obliged to make their needs smaller in order to accommodate yours.

10000% a goady as fuck shaming post.

I’ve been every size from 8 to 16 over the years, currently a 10 (Mounjaro), but have always had a tricky relationship with food. I’ve also struggled to fit in a Japanese plane seat, not realizing they came in different sizes.

I’ve also been rammed against a morbidly obese man on a 7 hour flight. It’s revolting, and often (not always) being bigger increases sweating, which can cause odour, as it did in this man’s case. He should absolutely have purchased two seats, and if he can’t afford to meet his own seating needs on the flight, then he can’t afford to fly.

They should make it very easy to buy two seats, ensuring they are next to each other (apparently some people do buy two seats because they need them but then find they're not next to each other!) and refund one of them if the plane isn't full.

I think this is the policy for some American internal flights and it seems reasonable to me. Plus size passengers should not be treated poorly or shamed, and people should also be able to have full use of the seat they have purchased.

She maybe has a serious illness and is taking steroids. She would have been given the seat belt extension thing to fit before flying. Did you speak to her, bet she was really nice and felt awful for squishing you.

I wonder what would happen if they put two morbidly obese passengers in the seats next to each other. And tell them to just get on with it, like the smaller-sized people who have to endure it are told.

Maybe you should have suggested she eats less and moves more? I'd say that would have solved the problem. If you see any anorexic looking girls out and about you should tell them to eat, 2 problems solved. Tell gamblers to stop gambling too. And definitely tell alcoholics to stop drinking, they never seem happy!

It seems that this post is collecting the usual responses where people are super keen to express their disgust, revulsion and dislike of very fat people.

Perhaps this is what they should do!