To think life is more of a pain in the arse than it's worth

[CurdinHenry]

Another day another random assortment of hassle and pain

And this is pretty much the best it's ever been (ok the 00s were better)

Aibu to wonder why this is a secret truth?

Wow, I don't resonate with this at all. I'm grateful for my life every single day, not saying it's perfect and a there are things we can't control but I'm bloody grateful for everything I have. Genuinely deeply grateful. I think your post is offensive to people suffering from terminal illnesses or trapped in a war zone, who would give anything to just live. I also resent people who take one look at me smiling and laughing and assume my positive outlook has been handed to me freely with no effort. I've actually done a lot of work on myself to overcome a lot of anxiety and depression. You sound depressed OP, there's help available..

I'm generally pretty optimistic and 'make the most of things' in my approach to life. I don't find the idea that life is futile or has no meaning at all problematic. That alone makes the meaning to just make the most of the here and now. I'm content with that.

I felt happier as I got older (55). Learning about philosophy helped a lot. And Buddhism. I think people search for happiness in the wrong places. It's never going to be external, well not to any extent.

Says someone who's never had depression....
You're v lucky

It impacts your life if you are sensitive and are an empath

Hard disagree.
Yes it can be hard to be a human. It’s the human condition. Lives of quiet desperation and all that. And it’s why so many humans invented the various gods.
But I am deeply happy in my 60s and still fascinated by everything. No need for a god or promise of heaven. Getting older helps. And being lucky.
A garden
A book
A cat
A cup of tea
Watching videos of birds raising their babies.
There is so much to be joyful for.

I was thinking about starting a thread similar to this. I wonder if most people see life as a gift? I never have.

I remember thinking I wish I had never been in existence from
as early as 6 years old. It doesn’t mean you are suicidal, you’d just rather not have to deal with the bother.

Are there are a significant amount of people who feel the same way but feel they can’t say it?

This is me also. Different conditions. Been particularly bad this year. I mean it’s always bad, but this year it’s off the scale. Even my youngest said, mum you never seem to get a break. I’ve become a shell of myself this year.

Since I was 15. I’m now in my 60’s. Daily. Most days I cope, as it’s not too bad. But this year, simply been unable to really leave the house much and not on my own. Can’t really see an end to it at the moment. Hopefully the new meds start working quickly! I just feel for dh as he has to do so much more.

I'm having a good time 🤷‍♀️. Sorry you're not.

Hopefully for your your good time doesn't end abruptly so that you can empathise with those who maybe aren't so lucky.

Uh, I did. That's why I said sorry that the OP isn't.

I was just making the point that not everyone thinks life is shit. And I've had plenty of hard times too.

The shrug emoji made it look a bit sarcastic.

There's hard times and then there's hard times. I guarantee you won't be having such a good time for years if one of your children, your husband or yourself die or is diagnosed with a terminal or serious illness next week.

The shrug emoji was about me having a good time. Not after I said sorry.

I've lost several family members to various things. Yes, if I lost my husband or child tomorrow my life would be shit for a while. Doesn't mean that everyone else's lives are also shit and that they're all lying about it.

I disagree, despite being in the ‘life is amazing, albeit with some tangibly shit bits’ camp myself. Some of what we’re seeing is not mental illness but just different personality styles. Even from the youngest ages, we see the world in different ways. I have one child who is very light hearted and one who has been always close to ennui from her earliest days. She’s not unwell, and my looser living child isn’t an idiot either. They are just very differently wired.

I was responding to a post by the OP, who apparently is not suffering from depression.

No, I have never had it and agree that I am lucky. I do have one friend who suffers from it, but even she seems to be able to find joy at times and I can't imagine her making a post like the original one, which seems to be from someone who simply can't be bothered looking for the good things in life.

No, some people are in happy oblivion about how life can be. I remember being there too.

Losing elderly relatives or parents isn't the same as some tragedy that involves your child or even your spouse. That's in the natural order. Though at least the spouse is more in the natural order than a child if you get old enough. Even with all I've been through and losing a child and finding out my other children are at risk, I can appreciate that I'm not in the position of those poor people who lose their whole family in one swoop. What a nightmare.

That's not to say I'm not having a good time. I'm having a good time at the same time as managing the shit. I'm quite content with the idea that life has no deeper meaning and we're all just creating our own meaning on whatever level we choose.

Some days it does cross my mind that the only escape I have is when I do eventually die, but I still want to get really old. Meanwhile, I'm creating my own fun and joy.

Objectively gash around here. You are a wordsmith.

I don't think I'm in a happy oblivion. I lost my dad, when I was a child, in pretty awful circumstances. I've also lost a sibling to cancer, when they were very very young.

"I'm quite content with the idea that life has no deeper meaning and we're all just creating our own meaning on whatever level we choose." I do agree with this though.

Those are indeed among the significant life events, so you've been there. I didn't mean you are specifically in oblivion. A lot of the general population seems to be though. Lucky them. I know I was and I'm very lucky that I got to be in my 40s before I found out how blissfully naive that position was.

Everybody does not remember their child/teen/young person years with fondness and affection!!

People keep having children because the maternal urge is very strong in most women. It's as simple as that. Most people don't sit down and consider the state of the world before trying for a baby. They just really really want one, to fill their maternal need.

I very much doubt that couple is happy. Maybe they put on a smile for those around them but I can’t imagine them being genuinely happy after that traumatic event.

Many people can be genuinely happy again after very traumatic events, whether you can imagine it or not.

Yes of course, but losing 3 children in a freak accident? I’m not so sure that anyone could after this.

Life is what you make it. You can chose to moan about the storms or learn to dance in the rain!