Question for the 'mellow yellow' folk

[Sugarnspicenallthingsnaice]

I'm well aware that I am going to sound like piss troll but a quick search of my history should prove otherwise!

I'm on holiday with inlaws, I have a tendency to get irritable when I'm forced into close quarters with others so am after an honest reality check from you all.

MN has taught me that lots of people don't flush their pee every time, especially overnight, for environmental reasons or because of noisy plumbing. Cool, I don't leave mine but I understand why people do.

AIBU to think that even if it's your normal family practice not to, you might flush more often when;

1. staying with other people who you are not as close to (i.e. not related by blood, have not shared a home before and in one case not met before)
2. bathrooms are absolutely tiny and anyone entering after you is going to have to manoeuvre around the toilet in order to flush after you so they can use it
3. you are unwell and your pee looks like tea and reeks

AIBU to also think that the lid should be closed on unflushed pee, so as not to let the smell fill the room?

We are all jetlagged so up and down at all hours of the night and I'm getting very sick of being confronted by the sights and smells of other people's piss, but happy to be told if I'm being precious.

Other possibly relevant info - I am the only woman.

No?

My dad doesn't flush, very unpleasant when I'm visiting.

Whoever has pee the colour of tea + it’s stinky needs to get to a pharmacy or GP !!
our plumbing is so noisy + house so echoey I prefer to leave it during the night but put the lid down then flush first thing when everyone is up .
We don’t have stinky dark pee though as we drink loads of water .

You've got to the root of why I asked AIBU in the first place. I really am squicky about other peoples' toiletty stuff, and about letting anyone hear see or smell my own. Can't help it, but I do understand it's not normal hence throwing myself into the vipers' pit for opinions.

YANBU to have a preference this way - I also think men's wee smells awfully strong, but am never sure whether it's that men's wee in general smells stronger, or whether as a woman I can smell it more and as a man they can smell it less, or something like that? I am not sure.

Anyway I have only sons and a husband and despite growing up in an all-female "let it mellow" household I no longer accept that rule, because I find it incredibly disgusting.

The only thing that I would add is that it can be difficult to change automatic muscle memory so if they are not used to flushing they might legitimately forget.

How can you flush wee before you produce it?

Some people will just look for a way to blame a woman.

What the fuck? We should flush the toilet… the only time it’s acceptable is if it’s the middle of the night maybe. I remember once I’d just got DS down when I was at my dads and he flushed which didn’t wake DS but then he farted so loud he woke him up 😭.

I would probably say “hay you guys need to flush and also whoever’s pee that is you are dehydrated and need to start drinking more water.”

Fair enough, OP. Then no harm in asking the ILs, or, if they’re your DH’s family, getting him to ask. If they’re alternative is total misery for you.

Having shared a workplace with a ‘mellow yellow’ person and had to look at (and smell, on occasion) her fermenting piss on a daily basis for a couple of years, I consider there to be a special place in hell for those who subject other people to this. Generally speaking, I think people should not go leaving body fluids around for public view. This applies to pissing in a shared loo and also to changing kids’ nappies. Your piss isn’t an achievement you need to share.

I have complete annoyance for anyone who does not flush the loo after a wee. And to bring kids up to do it, so they don’t wake their parents or others in the night, is ridiculous. If someone can’t get back to sleep, then that’s on them!

Flush all the way. And definitely in your situation OP. Gross!

We tend not to flush wee when at home (saves water, we are on a meter), but if we had guests we would, and definitely if we were staying somewhere else.

Well it’s only shit, it’s not going to hurt you, but it would be downright disgusting to leave a shit in the loo.

Bloody hell where are people getting their standards from? It’s not medieval times people!

I’m on a meter as well. But I thought I was living in the UK, not the third world?!

I couldn't share a loo with my in laws, bad luck OP. It is gross too. We don't flush at night after the kids are asleep as they are both on either side of he bathroom but at least we are blood relatives 😆

Poo is a lot more dangerous than wee.

Same here. I am on a water meter. All the flushing really does add up, plus I am on a low income so I make savings where I can.
Of course if I have a visitor, I flush... but it is mostly me alone so I leave it.

Just - gross.

DH works away 7 weeks out of 8 and I have a toilet to myself (and I also accidentaly left the garden hose on for an entire 24 period back in May when i went away) and so I might flush twice a day because I know it's only me. But not if I were sharing a toilet with other people.

"If someone can’t get back to sleep, then that’s on them!"

That's such a selfish opinion. I don't like leaving the toilet unflushed, but I live with a really light sleeper who finds it really hard to get back to sleep when woken up. Sleep deprivation is miserable. I can't imagine a world in which I would knowingly wake them up and ruin their sleep every single night and then blame them. Perhaps you live alone but compromise is important! Even over piss 😂

If someone can’t get back to sleep, then that’s on them!

You could equally say, if someone can’t deal with a bit of wee left in a toilet, then that’s on them.

Is that not only if you mix ammonia with bleach? Anyway point taken about the cleaner having to fish it out - I’d try a clip on rim block then and remove it before checkout.

I live on my own and don't flush the loo at night. It feels like a waste of water. If I''m at someone else's house I usually ask if they usually flush at night or not, seeing as usually have to get up once during the night, so it's always helpful to know!

One will be fresh wee, one will be festering, stinking for a few hours or more wee .. I know which I’d prefer to have splashed 🙄

Don’t live alone, full family, and my DC have been brought up in a quiet household, but never afraid to flush the loo.

What, dangerous, sat in the loo basin?

My point still stands, not dangerous, but rank, grim and scruffy to not flush a loo when we live in a first world country with superb flushing facilities.

A first world country with ridiculous prices for water from companies who spew sewage into the sea.