Inconsequential but HIGHLY irritating things your DH does

[itslikecakesbutitsnotcakes]

I’m not talking ‘fails to do any housework’ or ‘won’t parent his own kids’ but minor irritations that make you want to scream but you can’t because its so petty. For me

Refuses to use the automatic windscreen wiper. Instead he waits until he has no visibility and then manually flips the wiper on once. In heavy rain he’s doing it every couple of seconds. Just put the bloody auto wipers on!!

Unloads the dishwasher but leaves select things stacked up ‘near’ the cupboard or drawer they live in rather than putting them away. Apparently they are left there to ‘thoroughly dry’.

Rage!!!

My husband's sneezing is so loud it sometimes hurts my ears

whistling and strumming fingers LOUDLY. Does my head in. Usually when I’m on the phone to crying to have a conversation with one of the children.

Leaves a used glass on the countertop over the dishwasher and doesn’t put it into the dishwasher. 🙄
I must ask him why.

Wakes me up from a siesta. Just for once Id like to wake when I was ready, but no, helpful Harry wakes me with a cup of tea when he wakes. Yesterday Id been asleep all of 10 mins 😠

Puts his half read newspaper down on a seat - just ragebait for me. I never say anything because i am aware I’m being unreasonable. BUT SEATS ARE FOR SITTING NOT STUFF.

Scrapes his plates at the end of a meal, like collecting every last scrap and smidge of sauce.

I don't underfeed him by the way, he gets very good portion sizes and then some!!

Haha, this!!

Not completely inconsequential because it would be burnt/ be half a meal but he declares we need to sort dinner, picks something puts the thing that needs cooking longest in the oven then leaves to do some other job like washing the car or mowing the lawn. Never ever returns to check on it.

Similar to the husband defrosting the stew, if he reheats/ reuses something I’ve cooked as dinner the next night he’ll be like ‘how is it’ and ‘hope you enjoy it’ like he’s expecting to be complimented on his cooking skills. I always say ‘it’s very nice as it was yesterday when I cooked it’. (He does also cook, and asks you how it is almost before you’ve had chance to take the first bite).

Another thing if he wants a taste of your meal/ a bit of your chocolate bar etc he’ll say ‘shall I have some’ in a tone like that would be a treat for you. If it’s eg his turn to cook or do bedtime but he’s busy with something, or I offer in some other way to help him out with something, he’ll say ‘yeah if you want to’ like he’s doing the favour. It drives me unreasonably mad - like doing stuff for him is an incredible treat for me. To be fair, this is how his mum has raised/ treats him - like she lives to serve him. But I’m not his mum!

I promise otherwise he’s pretty great, these things drive me up the wall though.

He cooks and you literally take one bite and he says 'so how's your dinner?'

I don't know its barely touched my fucking tastebuds mate

When we do a big shop from costco he does not help put stuff away. He will bring it into the kitchen then promptly disappear upstairs to change clothes wash face! anything but help put it away. He does an in between shop every friday at morrisons the receipts for the shop are always left on the side always. This consists of 3-4 bits like milk/bread. This he at least puts away

If I say hello to a colleague or acquaintance while we are at the shops he doesn’t wait until they are a safe distance away before asking who it is. Usually they are still only standing a few feet away while he loudly whispers ‘who’s that?’

Chops his spaghetti up with a knife and fork before eating it. The whole plate, chopped in one go. I don’t know why….but that is sooo irritating. I eat mine the Italian way, twirled on a fork ….

Pretty much, ‘how is it, is it ok’ me ‘yes, lovely’ , 2 bites later ‘hope everyone is enjoying it’ etc.

It’s the same old wanting a parade for doing an everyday task basically.

So many of the things already listed. A few more that I haven't seen on the thread:

Sometimes when we are having a minor disagreement, he will hum quietly while I am speaking. It drives me insane.

He has an aversion to throwing things away. He's not a hoarder by any means, but he always wants to keep things like cardboard boxes, just in case he needs them someday.

He still ties his shoelaces as a child might, with two bunny ears rather than the standard one loop method.

I'm sure he has a list of things I do that are intensely irritating as well!

what thrashing about on the window every morning?

Sometimes when we are having a minor disagreement, he will hum quietly while I am speaking. It drives me insane.
Sorry, that made me laugh. What a weird thing to do.

Do you want them to be hand dry with a tea-towel? Not sure if I understand what the issue is.

That is not accidental.

Leaves open the doors that need to be closed and closes the doors that need to be opened.

Puts the toothpaste back in the pot upside down, so it all gathers at the wrong end of the tube.

Empties the dishwasher, then just leaves his dirty cups, etc on the side.

After a food shop rather than put the food away in the cupboards and fridge, he arranges it all carefully on the kitchen island. He'll then fuss about with it slightly moving one thing over, adjusting another thing. Just put it away directly. Arrrgggghhhh!

And getting into or out of the car. Always the last. Always has the least to do. We're in the porch, shoes off, coats hung, through the front door, kettle on and he's still sauntering across the drive.

The loud throat clearing....

Same with mine! And every single bloody time he sneezes he says "Oh dear".

He still ties his shoelaces as a child might, with two bunny ears rather than the standard one loop method.

I need to know now. What's the standard one loop method?

Obsessive ‘Bin’ behaviour … frantically keeping a check on recycling - huffing as he takes items out of the recycle pile and designates the correct place to dispose….. marching through the house with recycle bag held aloft and announcing ‘I’m coming through… clear the way’ checking the arrival or not of the bin collection, actually noting for god sake - which neighbours are ‘late’ to take theirs out and generally being a pita.

However is utterly oblivious to cleaning up after himself in the bathroom - mat left on the floor, soggy, toilet frequently unflushed, a wreck of crumbs and butter contamination in the kitchen and never ever ever will take a cup or mug back to the kitchen ….drives me absolutely mad…. From one obsessive passion to utter and total disregard of every day keeping things tidy and functional. And the sanctimonious attitude about how important his job as ‘bin manager ‘ is whilst I clear up around him EVERY day.