Has anyone ever actually called a friend at 3am?

[BathroomShales]

We’re often told on MN that unless a friend will pick up the phone and support you at 3am, they aren’t really a friend. It’s just superficial.

But has anyone ever actually called a friend at 3am for support?

Also, assuming it must be something pretty serious for a 3am call. If so, I’d probably help out an acquaintance if they called at that time too.

It’s a load of bollocks isn’t it? And what’s wrong with a few superficial friendships if you’re getting good craic from them?

AIBU?

A friend no, but I once called my mum. How ok I’d be receiving such a call depends more on the situation of the caller than who it is. I’m not doing night calls for medium level dramas even with good friends, I think we’re not at high school anymore, but in a serious crisis I would help friends and acquaintances.

My phone is on silent or off overnight. I wouldn't object on principle to speaking to a friend in an emergency at 3am, but the issue wouldn't arise, and I'm not going to leave it on in case anyone wants me then. Probably be more likely to be a bum dial anyway!

I had a phone call at 2.30am once from a friend in hospital suffering a psychotic episode

Not sure it was 3am, but it was very early .
My cat had to be put to sleep.i was at the vets.
My children were due back at 9. Ex
was not understanding of anything.
I reached out to a friend.
She totally stood up. Was there when needed.
We are not clingy friends.
We just know each other.
If she asked..I would know it was important.
And I would do anything for her.

Aye someone once rang me at 2am with some drunk shite (in the days before smartphones). It proved she was a batshit drama llama and I gave her short shrift and blocked her. Anyone who actually disrespects your sleep like that can piss off. My phone is strictly on DND from 10pm to 8am now that it's a thing.

A friend used to call me at 3am frequently as she had serious MH issues. I was very tolerant for a good ten years but in the end, I felt used, burnt out and backed away from the friendship. Mutual friends still think I am a selfish heartless cow. But they were not the ones being treated as an emotional support human.

Not quite 3am, but both DH and I have rushed out to help friend in the middle of the night for varying reasons. I have also asked friends for help at the last minute (and asked my mum too!).

If anyone calls me at 3am they would have no luck. Im on do not disturb/sleep mode. Clearly a shit friend 😂 and I wouldnt dream of even sending a message at that time...

I did last night as we were locked out of our Airbnb and they were asleep inside it!

Same but it was my sister. The only other people to call me at 3am are exes who have had a drink and decided they want to reconnect... those phone calls don't ever get answered. Neither do the "sorry, sorry, sorry!" text messages when they wake up and look at their call log the next afternoon...

A call to look after someone's kids type emergency sure i would not hesitate to help but i would not call someone for chat nor would i be impressed to receive one

Ive phoned a friend at that time. I’ve also had calls in the middle of the light from my Mum, daughter, brother, and a friend. Ive got no problem with someone close to me contacting me at any time if they need my help or support. I would never dream of turning my phone off overnight, but if I did, they woukd ring me on my landline anyway 😆

Didn’t realise that was a popular opinion on here. But no, I have never contacted anyone at 3am. I suppose I’m lucky I’ve never been in such a dire situation that I needed to.

I have always wondered this OP.

The last time someone called at 3am it was a teenaged friend of my DDs needing help, she couldn’t reach her own DPs so called me. She needed actual help and advice, if someone called me at 3am for a chat I’d be pretty non-plussed.

In MN people also seem to have friends regularly calling with relationship dramas. This doesn’t happen to me in real life.

I once invited 2 people to join a video conference call at 2am but that's 'cos I don' t know how to work my phone!
One of them answered by text "is everything OK?" - she's passed the test for "who can I rely on? ".

My phone is also on DND overnight but unlikely anyone would contact me in an emergency too be honest! Hypothetically a genuine emergency yes i would help out friends or family but can't say its ever happened.

My phone is on silent overnight so I wouldn’t pick up and I don’t think any of my friends or family would either. If I knew there was some sort of crisis with my friend or family then I have and would leave my phone on ring.

I never have but I’ve had a school mum friend call me needing urgent childcare at 3am once and I did go and help her. Her husband was having an episode and paramedics were trying to get him into an ambulance, it had woken her small children and she obviously didn’t want them witnessing all of this and had nobody else to help, I didn’t mind and was happy to help.

My (male) best friend called me at 2am around 30 years ago. He had heard some news that really upset him and he feared that he might do something stupid. I had been asleep but came to and we talked for about 45 minutes. He promised that he wouldn’t do anything other than drive to his parents’ house and would call me after I got back from work.
I was glad I was able to be there. As a result of that call and some devious work on my part, last year he celebrated 25 years of marriage to the love of his life, but when he called me, he thought he’d never see her again.

No I've never contacted anyone at 3 a.m. There are a few people I probably could, if I really needed to.

I've phoned my dad in the early hours when I went on holiday for the first time and got stranded at the airport. I didn't have the contact details of my family I was staying with or any local currency so had to reverse charge the called;!
Lesson learned rather fast!

No, I've not called anyone but in the days when i had a landline i used to get calls from a drunken woman around 3am. I've also had calls from people phoning in sick at 2am and being surprised that I'm not X hotel.

I turned up on my friend's doorstep at 3 a.m. (this was decades ago) after fleeing domestic abuse. Fortunately she answered the door!

I haven’t but I am comforted to know that there are people I could if I needed to. Isn’t “3am” really just an analogy for a friend who you know you could absolutely rely on if something awful happens?

They’d not get through.

Only family will get through on my phone between 10pm and 6am. I need my sleep!!