AIBU for refusing an expensive pre-booked weekend away with in-laws?

[Floff1]

AIBU for not wanting to go on a weekend away with in laws.
Somewhere was pre booked without warning, no heads up for pricing etc then got told to pay over £200pp for a 2 night stay, a few people dropped out and now the price has increased over £100. That's over £600 for myself and partner. We can't afford it, living literally week by week just to put food on the table, we don't air our finances but it's no secret to them that we struggle.
I'm a bit annoyed that something was booked with no mention of a "hey thinking of doing this are you OK with it/ what's your price range" or similar.
I've mentioned to my DH that he needs to say something because if we drop out the price will increase again for others, and i dont like the thought or burdening others, he keeps saying he will sort it but nothing.
Not only this but this weekend away means my family of 6 will be sharing one bedroom, which doesn't really appeal to me forking out this much money (which we don't have anyway) to all share one room when a few others will have rooms to themselves even though they are partners.
I dunno. Am I overthinking and causing unnecessary problems in my own head?

Six people in one room? No way!

That’s an absolute no from me. Why on earth would you put yourself into financial hardship to go on a trip you don’t want to go on, and be cramped in a room all together. That’s nuts.

1 bedroom 6 people £600 - no way!

I would have said no, the minute this was suggested.

When were you told and when is the trip? If you’ve known for weeks and it’s next week and you’re only now thinking about telling them it’s too expensive, then why?!

We were just told that it was booked months in advance, before the price went up, I said to DH I/we can't afford that from day one so he said he will sort it, it's his family so left it to him. Told very recently the price went up and needs to be paid in 2 weeks

Fuck no. And your DH is a spineless muppet. He should have said something ages ago

Say you aren't going. You didn't ask to go and you can't afford it.

It is your DH's problem. But in this case, given it affects others and your DH is ostriching out this issue, I would tell your inlaws - Sorry, we really can't do this - not within our budget.

Refuse to go and don't pay anything. They should have asked whether you and your family wanted to go before booking. They should very annoying.

send a message to his mother right now saying you cannot afford it and her out of everyone, should understand that.

Tell DH that if he hasn’t told his family by 6pm tomorrow, you will do so instead.

Tell them before someone else drops out too, and it makes it every more expensive for others if you drop out!

Your DH needs to sort this ASAP. They absolutely should not of booked without asking you but you are both wrong for not letting them know immediately. They have no chance to cancel and get any money back or find someone else to take the place

I think you should have said no when they told you they’d booked it.

Your DH sounds a bit pathetic. No way would I do this.

The people dropping out should pay their share, unless they hadn’t agreed to go either. The remaining people shouldn’t be picking up the tab.

Absolutely not. Who booked it? Why do they think they can just do that without discussing first?

Send a message to MIL saying “I’m so sorry, DH and I discussed this and we agreed we can’t afford it and this was ages ago. He said he would sort it and tell you but he clearly hasn’t. We just can’t afford it, and especially with the new price. Hope you all have a good holiday”

Happens often 🙃

Do you mean they have form for this kind of controlling batshit behaviour?

If so, that’s even more reason why you should have been ready to shut it down and refuse to go as soon as you were informed.

Exactly this.

£200 a night for a family of six doesn't sound too bad, as it's obviously being charged per adult. All in one room will be a bit crowded though. However, if you can't afford it you should have said immediately you were told the price! The longer you've left it, the more people have dropped out and now it's even less affordable and more inconvenient when you cancel. If you had said sooner maybe a refund or change of booking would have been possible? Don't wait for your hopeless DH, let the organiser know this evening. (Or take the money out of DH's gym membership, phone contract, Sky Sport subscription etc)

It was £200 per person, not room. It’s now over £300 per person, so over £600 for a single night.

I just can’t imagine allowing this to happen. If someone in our family turned around and told me they’d booked a trip away on xxx date at xxx place and I owe them xxx amount for it, I’d probably laugh in their face assuming they were joking. It would just be a straight no.

“Sorry we aren’t free that weekend.” / “Sorry I like to have some sort of say in where I’m going.” / “Sorry, not really sure why you’ve gone ahead and booked that without checking first.” / “Sorry but that’s not suitable, we don’t all want to sleep in one room, I would have preferred some say in choosing accommodation.” / “Sorry but we’ve already used our holiday budget this year, we had no idea you were planning on doing this.” / “Sorry but you can’t just spring this on us unexpectedly, we can’t make it.”
Etc etc etc.

This.